


Green

by Cottonstones



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Fake Marriage, Friends to Lovers, GGBB 2017, M/M, Oral Sex, Riding, Rimming, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-11 17:45:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 62,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11719341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cottonstones/pseuds/Cottonstones
Summary: When Jack is on the verge of being deported for good Vernon decides to step-in on a whim and save him the only way he knows how. He decides to marry Jack to allow him a green card. Dealing with immigration isn't easy, but neither is pretending to be in love with one of your best friends, and what happens when Vernon realizes that just maybe he's no longer pretending?





	Green

**Author's Note:**

> I've been sitting on this idea for a long time and wanted to do it and I knew the Game Grumps Big Bang Challenge would be the perfect time!

Vernon is at his computer, answering emails that are being sent between the different sections of staff working on the Dream Daddy game when Jack gets back from grabbing lunch for everyone. The first sign that something isn’t right is that Jack hurriedly sets the food down on the long section of table that makes up their brand-new eating area. He pushes a hand through his hair and then visibly counts the bags. Vernon frowns. Jack isn’t usually frazzled, especially by a lunch pick-up; out of everyone in the office Vernon can depend on Jack the most to keep an upbeat attitude and lift everyone else’s spirits. 

Vernon frowns, but he’s not one to pry unless the person looks like they’re willing to talk. He tries to go back to his emails, but his eyes keep drifting over to Jack. He’s about to give up on being productive and go and check in on him when Matt and Ryan notice Jack’s return. 

“Hey! Lunch is here, guys!” Matt yells, signaling the rest of the office. 

Vernon watches as the two youngest members of their team approach Jack. Ryan pats him on the shoulder as he and Matt begin to paw through the bags to find their lunches. Jack smiles in response to the touch, but Vernon notices that it fades fast, his gaze sliding downcast to the floor, his mouth pulled into a frown. The rest of the Grumps pad into the room to collect their food. Vernon has his own order somewhere in the bags, but he still hasn’t moved from his desk. He can’t help but be a little worried about Jack. 

Arin leans over to grab two containers from the table - either his and Dan’s or his and Suzy’s - Jack spots him and Vernon watches from a distance as Jack places his hand on Arin’s shoulder to get his attention. By now Vernon is standing and moving towards the table but he’s not close enough to hear whatever words pass between Arin and Jack. The ball of worry in his stomach grows bigger, gains momentum, when Arin’s eyebrows thread together and he nods, tilting his head towards the back hallway near the bathrooms. 

The two of them disappear together and Vernon watches them until Ross’s voice cuts through the noise of the kitchen, diverting his attention. 

“Vernon, did you order the burrito?” 

“Um, yeah, thanks,” Vernon says as Ross hands off a Styrofoam container, “Hey, uh, has Jack seemed okay to you today?” Vernon asks, as casually as he possibly can. He has no reason to be alarmed and he doesn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to something that isn’t his business, but at the same time he couldn’t deny that something was off about Jack. 

Ross glances around as if trying to suss out where Jack had gotten to. He shrugs, “I don’t really know. I haven’t been around him much today, been too busy working. Why? Did something happen?” 

“No,” Vernon says, shaking his head, “Forget it. Everything’s fine.” At least he hopes so, but he doesn’t want to go spreading worry and doubt where there might be no need for it, calling fire at the first sign of smoke. 

He takes his lunch and finds a seat at the wide table they’d installed to fit the growing number of people working in the office. Arin’s not back yet and neither is Jack while both Suzy and Dan have come out to claim their lunches. Vernon thinks about asking one of them, but he doesn’t know how to do it privately, the both of them seated across from him at the table. If he brings it up now he’d alert the whole group, and if something really was going on with Jack then everyone would know and Vernon would be the giant asshole who outed the issue. 

Vernon tries to push down the surge of anxiety that’s moving through him in time with his pulse. He gets anxious easily when it comes to his friends, when he thinks something’s wrong, and his natural drive is to fix it. He tries to focus on his food, on eating, on reminding himself not to jump to conclusions. As far as he knows Jack is fine, everything is fine, and life will go on in the office like it always has. 

He’s about half-way through his burrito when Arin and Jack finally return. Jack looks no happier, in fact, he looks sadder than before. Arin too seems stiffer than usual, his body tight as he approaches the rest of them at the table.

“Here you go, buddy, I saved you a seat,” Dan says, patting the open spot next to him. Arin nods gratefully and he drops into the spot next to Dan, setting his lunch down on the table in front of him. 

The last untouched meal on the table is Jack’s and he stands there for a moment, eyes scanning the lot of them, looking like a child who can’t find a seat amongst the popular kids in the lunchroom. Vernon knows that feeling, maybe they all do in one way or another, and it pains him to think that Jack could look at them like that and not see a place for him to fit. He scoots over, pressing in against Barry. 

“I got you, Jackie,” Vernon says, nodding towards the open spot next to him on the end. 

Jack smiles, and it’s close to the real, genuine, Jack Walsh brand smile that Vernon is familiar with, but it’s lacking something, the spark that makes it authentic. 

“Thanks, Vernon,” Jack mumbles and he grabs his Styrofoam container as he sits next to Vernon, the cramped space at the table causing their thighs to touch. Vernon’s anxiety ratchets up a notch. Jack really doesn’t seem okay, Arin doesn’t seem fully like himself either, and Vernon just wishes he knew what was going on, even though it’s not his business to know unless Jack decides to tell him. 

Lunch passes without any mention of what might be going on and Jack and Arin slip into conversation with everyone like usual, but again Vernon notes that Jack seems dimmer, isn’t his usual upbeat self as he sits, and chats, and laughs, but when the eyes slip off of him he’s pushing his food around with a fork, looking like he might cry at the drop of a hat. 

After their meals are done Arin and Dan head back to finish recording their session, Matt and Ryan head back to the editing bay to work on episodes, and everyone else more or less filters off to their personal areas as business goes on as usual. Everyone is in their usual place except for Jack. In fact, Vernon doesn’t see Jack after lunch. He might be sorting mail in the storage room or doing another mundane task that isn’t the most fun or glamourous, but helps hold the office together, but Vernon doesn’t know where Jack is and that ball of worry sticks around in Vernon’s gut. 

At some point during the recording session Arin comes out to grab a drink. Vernon sees him and he bites at his lip as he debates bringing it up, tries to remind himself that it’s not his business, but in the end, he pads over to Arin as he’s elbow deep in the fridge digging around for his favorite flavor of LaCroix. 

“Hey, Arin, you, uh, seen Jack around?” Vernon says, aiming for casual but worried he’s coming off too obvious. 

Arin straightens up with his favored can in hand, “Oh, I gave Jack the afternoon off. He had some stuff to deal with.” 

“Oh,” Vernon says. The knot in his stomach growing bigger. Jack was a wonderful person, kind and sweet, and Vernon was always amazed at the way he held himself. Jack acted like the world wasn’t a shitty place, and that if he just threw enough kindness and positivity at it, the world would change around him, would be like him. Vernon admired it, even if he didn’t think it was a realistic way to live life. The thought of living with your most vulnerable self out in the open, it terrified him. 

“Did you need him for a recording thing? Because Ryan could fill in or-“ 

“No,” Vernon says, “No, I was just curious. I hadn’t seen him after lunch and didn’t know what was up.” 

Arin nods, he messes with the bun of his ponytail, the can of LaCroix sweating in his hand, “He’ll be back tomorrow. No worries.” 

“Okay,” Vernon says, though he feels like there’s more, something brewing under the surface, something else Arin wants to tell him and if he just waits long enough maybe he’ll hear it. 

Arin hesitates just a moment before he closes the fridge. He nods towards Vernon as he pads back towards the recording room, set to finish the current session. Reluctantly, Vernon heads to his desk to try and get back to work, willing himself to not worry about things that are out of his control. 

\--

The next morning Vernon’s back at the office, a coffee in hand. He’s at Suzy’s desk, leaning against the sleek edge as he regales her with the pros of grinding your own coffee at home. Suzy laughs at him, it’s not mean, but fondly. Vernon knows he can sometimes be pretentious. He knows it, and embraces it, but damn does his hand grinder make good coffee. 

“I’m serious. I’ll bring you a cup and you’ll be sold.” 

Suzy smiles, “Is coffee going to be your next venture?” 

“Maybe after the game is all done.” 

Suzy opens her mouth to reply but then Arin’s voice is echoing loudly through the office. 

“Hey, can I get everyone over here a minute? We’re having an impromptu meeting!” 

Arin’s announcement is met with a bout of groans that reminds Vernon of being in high school, like Arin’s the teacher who just informed the class about a pop-quiz. Vernon glances at Suzy, as if trying to see if she knows more about this meeting than he does. She just smiles and shrugs, but like the day before with Arin, it feels like there’s something else, something more to be said. 

“Let’s go,” she says, standing and touching softly at Vernon’s elbow. He nods and the two of them head towards where Arin’s leaning against the wall next to the food tables. He looks normal if not a little tense, his body drawn tight as he knocks on the wooden table top next to him with his fist. 

“Come on, guys!” 

“We’re coming _dad_ ,” Ross says, earning giggles from Matt and Ryan. 

Vernon slides into a seat, hands curled around the warm ceramic of his coffee cup. The scent a comfort to him. They usually have their company meetings on Mondays, but today was Thursday and this was coming off the heels of Arin and Jack being weird the day before. Vernon bites his lip, chewing nervously at the small peeling pieces of skin. 

As if he were summoned by Vernon’s thoughts, Jack eases into the room, not taking a seat like the rest of them, but standing at Arin’s side. He looks even younger and smaller when he’s stacked up against Arin. Jack looks a little better than yesterday but not by much. He won’t meet anyone’s eyes, his face looking off into the distance. 

Once everyone is settled Arin clears his throat. 

“Alright, I’m sorry to say that this meeting isn’t really a happy one.”

Vernon’s heart sinks. Fuck…was Jack leaving them? Was he quitting? He wouldn’t be the first person to ever leave the Grumps, but he’d be one of the more surprising exits. Vernon’s only ever heard how happy Jack was working with them. What would make him want to leave? Vernon didn’t think Jack was getting fired and if he was, no way in hell would Arin announce it in front of everyone with Jack right next to him, that was way too cruel and not at all Arin or the Grumps’ style. Arin cared about his employees like family, went to the ends of the Earth for them, especially when it came to Jack. 

“What’s going on?” Dan asks, his voice small, a frown taking over his face. It really must be serious if it was something coming from Arin that Dan didn’t know. It was rare for Arin to keep much of anything from the other man. Vernon glances around the table finding much of the same confusion spelled out on everyone else’s faces. 

Arin glances at Jack, “Do you want me to…?” he trails off and Vernon’s nerves are through the roof. 

“I suppose I can...” Jack says, his voice somber, “Um, I got a call from Immigration while I was picking up lunch yesterday. They’re claiming there’s an issue with my Visa, which I’m used to, but…” Jack takes a breath, “But they said the issue is serious and they want to send me home… and not for a few months like usual…they want to send me home for, like, _five years_.” 

“What?” Dan says, “What the fuck? Arin? Can they do that?” 

Arin looks helpless, his arm sliding around Jack’s shoulder, squeezing the smaller man. 

“I don’t know. I guess so? They told Jack if they can’t sort this out then he’s going home within the next two weeks.” 

“The next two _weeks_?” Brian asks, “This doesn’t sound legal.” 

“Immigration are assholes,” Ross says, his face grim, “I swear to shit they _love_ to make people’s lives harder.” 

Ross is the only one among them with any actual experience dealing with the immigration process, but from all the stories Vernon has heard, he knows that it was a nightmare for Ross. He can’t imagine it being any easier for Jack. 

“So, I guess, the point was to make this known. It’s pretty serious and Jack is one of our own. We’re going to try our hardest to keep him here with us,” Arin says, rubbing at Jack’s shoulder, and Jack forces a smile, but he looks far from optimistic about his fate. 

Vernon feels sick, feels pissed and scared on Jack’s behalf. He and Jack both began working for the Grumps around the same time, both thrown into this new world, and as such they had a kinship, they spent a lot of time together as they both gained their footing at their new jobs. Jack had gone home before, and each time was hard, it was hard to say goodbye, to know he was going to miss out on moments with everyone else, but there was always the promise that he’d be back again before too long. This…this feels scarily final. 

“Ross, how did you fix your issues?” Barry asks. 

“I married Holly and Arin signed the paper work saying he’d be my legal guardian if Holly and I couldn’t support ourselves.” 

“So, we just have to get Jack married?” Matt asks, somewhat serious, but also trying to lighten the mood in the room. 

Jack’s brows furrow, “There’s really no one I’ve dated here that I’d be comfortable marrying. Ross and Holly were in an actual relationship. I’ve had some flings with girls here and there, but nothing serious enough to consider marriage.” 

“Dude, it could be a marriage of convenience, you know? Just to sort your issues out and then you can get divorced?” Ross says. 

“Ross!” Suzy says, her face surprised as she turns to face him, “That isn’t fair to Jack or the girl he’d be marrying.” 

“What!” Ross says, looking genuinely surprised, “I’m trying to brainstorm how to keep him here! She could be in on it too! What’s that thing? Like…an arranged marriage, you know?”

Brian sighs, “I can’t believe I’m saying this but…Ross has a point.” 

Jack frowns, “I appreciate the help, but I’m not comfortable asking someone to do that for me. I’ll try to find a different way to stay here.” 

The room goes quiet, filled with unanswered questions, unvoiced opinions, thoughts and worries. Jack is one of the best people Vernon knows and it isn’t fair that this is happening to him. It sucks that it happens to anyone, but Vernon can’t imagine not seeing Jack for five years, can’t imagine never hearing his laugh, never making jokes with him as he sorts the Grump mail, never hearing that Irish lilt as he regales with them a story from his weekend. 

It goes without saying, but if Jack left then they’d have to replace him in the office. Ryan fills in when Jack is gone, but he’s only getting busier with editing and working on SuperMega content with Matt. It would be impossible to ask Ryan to take over for five years, and then, if they did replace Jack, what would happen when and if he came back? Would there still be room for him? Would he be welcomed back? And, in five years’ time, would Game Grumps – at least as it exists right now – even be around to come back to? 

“We’re not giving up, Jack,” Arin says, clapping Jack on the back gently, “We’ll think of something.” 

The others nod, but no one’s offering up ideas. They were content creators for YouTube, musicians, what they did they know about fighting the legal system to keep their immigrant friend in the country? Vernon sometimes considered himself cynical, blaming it on his age, and being on the internet for far too many years in his life. He was used to disappointment and bad shit happening. He didn’t want to believe that there was no way to save Jack, but he couldn’t help but feel like their options were limited. 

“Thanks guys,” Jack says, forcing a smile, one that looks odd for his face, “I appreciate it.” 

“I guess that’s all. Jack and I are going to work on this so if you have a suggestion come let us know.” 

The others nod and some words are murmured, but no one offers anything solid. They’ve had serious issues before, obstacles to tackle, and more often than not Arin would find a way to fix it for them. Arin was their fearless leader, their boss, and a lot of the times he felt like the ‘Office Dad’ that you could turn to for help. This felt out of his scope. What could Arin do to fix this? It felt odd and a little scary to realize that the one person who can usually fix anything might not be able to solve this. 

The ‘meeting’ is over but Vernon doesn’t feel like jumping back to work. Judging the slow way that the other Grumps leave the table, he’s guessing the feeling is mutual. The office is like a home, the people in it are like family, bonded by this wild ride they are all taking together. To hear one of them is going through a tough time is like they are all sharing that pain. Jack is one of them, a part of them, a part that Vernon isn’t ready to lose. 

He goes back to his desk; his emails open from this morning. He has a few from Leighton, asking him about some details for the game. She’s due to fly in to California in the next few days so she can be on-site in the office to work on wrapping up the game. It’s what he should be focusing on, but he can’t. Vernon won’t admit it to anyone else, but he spends the rest of the work day Googling, reading up on immigration, on what they can do. He’s not one for legality, but he’s trying to understand it, like a warrior who wants to learn about the terrible creature they’re meant to slay. 

What he keeps running into is getting married for a green card. It sounds like a stupid idea, the websites keep stating the marriage needs to be _real_ and not a sham, and Jack himself said he doesn’t want to dupe anyone into a pretend wedding, but that seems to be their easiest route. If Jack married a citizen he could stay. It seemed simple, but doing it, well, that felt anything but.

After a few hours Vernon’s eyes are burning from reading dozens upon dozens of websites full of advice that are varying degrees of helpful. His butt is asleep and his mind is tired, worn from running in circles trying to solve this problem. He decides to take a break, pushing out of his seat and hobbling towards the bathrooms. 

He’s not expecting to find Jack outside the bathrooms, his face in his hands. Vernon freezes, unsure if he should just walk away or say something. He’s not the best with emotions, most of his are intense, blooming inside of him in overwhelming surges that more often than not cause him to spill those feelings out in sappy praise to his friends and loved ones. Jack is upset and alone, and Vernon is his friend. 

“Shit,” Jack says, his voice small, slurring a bit as he brings his hands down from his face, “Sorry.” 

“No,” Vernon says quickly “I’m sorry. I was coming to use the bathroom…I didn’t mean…do you want me to go?” 

Jack shakes his head, “You don’t have to.” His face is red and splotchy, but he doesn’t look like he was crying. Maybe he just feels overwhelmed like Vernon does. It’s all worse for him, more intense. This is his life. If Vernon doesn’t find a solution then he can’t help Jack and Jack will go home, but Vernon’s life will stay the same. If _Jack_ can’t find a solution, everything changes for him, “’M sorry, I just needed a second. Arin’s on the phone with a lawyer and it’s not going well and…” Jack trails off, “I’m sorry.” 

“Hey,” Vernon says, stepping close to Jack, his hand finding Jack’s shoulder, “Hey, it’s okay. You need to vent? You can vent to me. I’m your friend and I care about you.” 

Jack smiles, but it’s broken and something aches deep inside of Vernon’s chest at the sight of it. 

“Thanks Vernon. I want to believe I can stay here with you all, but…it isn’t looking good and I’ll probably go home.” Jack’s body begins to shake under Vernon’s palm. It’s hard to watch the cheery and bright Jack that Vernon knows so well fall apart around him, “I’m just…I’m gonna miss it here, with you all, you know? And working on what I love, _doing_ what I love-I…” Jack trails off, makes a dry almost sobbing noise. 

Vernon tugs Jack close with the hand on his shoulder. He wraps Jack in a gentle hug, with Jack’s face pressed against Vernon’s neck, Vernon’s hands fisted in Jack’s grey hoodie. He can feel Jack’s heart beating so fast, and his body trembling against Vernon’s. Jack isn’t crying but he’s close. All Vernon can think about is what he read, what he saw, what Ross said. It repeats in his mind again and again, and again. 

Vernon squeezes his eyes shut and he clings to Jack. His head is a whirlwind of too many emotions, too much worry for Jack, for the office and team he loves so much. 

“I’ll do it,” Vernon whispers, surprised at his own voice, at the words slipping out of him. 

Jack freezes in Vernon’s arms and lifts his head, his eyes huge and dark, “Wh-What?” 

Vernon swallows, his throat like sandpaper. “What” was _right_. What was he doing? What was he _saying_? Maybe he was being stupid and impulsive, but he couldn’t sit by and do nothing. He can’t watch Jack suffer this way. 

“I’m saying…I guess, that I’ll marry you so you can stay in America. You need to marry a citizen to stay here, well, I’ll do it, Jack.” 

Jack gapes at him like a fish. Vernon’s insides feel like they are shriveling up. It was presumptuous of Vernon to even offer, boldly and idiotically without considering the fact; _Hey, maybe Jack doesn’t want to marry you?_

“Why would you want that, Vernon?” 

“To keep you here. You’re one of my best friends and I can’t really stand the thought of not seeing you for five damn years, man. I’d rather you stay here, stay with us.” 

Vernon knows it’s weird. It is. He’s holding Jack in the middle of the office and goddamn offering to _marry_ Jack to allow him his green card. Everything about it is weird. Vernon’s never dated a boy, and though he can appreciate a good-looking man as much as anyone. He’s never acted on any attractions that might have sprung up in his life, doesn’t consider himself bisexual, but he’s not dating anyone right now and his prospects are dim, so if he can pretend to be married to Jack he’s not hurting anyone and he’s solving Jack’s issue. 

“This is a lot to ask. I mean, are you sure you know what you’re saying?” 

Vernon steps away from Jack, putting some space between the two of them. The conversation is already strange enough without Vernon holding Jack as they discuss it. His head is spinning, throwing up every red flag on just why this is a bad idea. 

“I know it won’t be real and I’m fine with it. I won’t be expecting anything like someone else might. I know this sounds insane, but I’m willing to do this for you, Jack, to keep you here. If you want my help.” 

“Of course, I want help and I want to stay, but this is a huge favor to ask and I don’t know how-“ 

“Don’t worry about it. Let me do this. A lot of good things have come my way in my life, the least I can do is pay it forward, right? We get married, you get your green card, and boom! Six months later you’re a citizen and we get divorced, and life goes on as usual.” 

Jack looks skeptical but he’s not flat out saying no, which is good because Vernon isn’t sure he could handle the rejection, even if it’s just of a fake marriage proposal. 

“I do think we should talk to Arin about this,” Jack says. 

Vernon winces at the thought of admitting to Arin what he’s getting himself into, afraid to hear what a monumentally stupid idea their boss will think it is, but if he’s going to be fake-married to Jack then he has to pretend it’s real, they both do, and a part of that is letting their friends and co-workers know that it’s happening. 

“I guess it’s kinda like asking your dad for permission, right?” Vernon says, falling back on humor because it’s all he has, his go-to when things feel tense or awkward. 

Jack laughs, which is a good sign, a smile crossing his face and Vernon hadn’t realized just how much he missed Jack’s true smile until he saw it again in this moment. 

“I guess so,” Jack says. He moves past Vernon, heading towards Arin’s office. Vernon’s glad that Arin’s had his office moved into a more secluded part of the building, just so they could have this conversation in private, at least for the moment. The closer the more Vernon can hear Arin talking. He sounds firm, humorless, so unlike himself that it’s a little unnerving. Jack hovers outside the closed door, sucking in a breath. 

“I think he’s talking to the lawyer still,” Jack says. 

“Alright, well, thanks for your time. Please call me back ASAP if you learn more.” Arin says, and then there’s quiet. He watches Jack, not daring to move until he does. 

Jack is braver than Vernon, or maybe he’s more comfortable with Arin. Either way, he opens the door faster than Vernon would. He holds it open to allow Vernon to pass through after him. Arin is seated at his desk, his chin in his hands. He looks stressed and that’s a look that Vernon is used to seeing on his boss, especially with all the projects the company has been picking up as of late. His eyes flicker first over Jack before switching over to Vernon. 

“The lawyer is going to give me a call back in a little while,” Arin says, his voice losing steam, like he’s aiming for careful, reeling himself back in for Jack’s sake. 

Jack nods and drops into the seat opposite Arin’s desk, Vernon picking up on the cue and doing the same in the other seat. Now he feels the nerves dancing in his stomach like butterflies. He’s reminded of high school, like Arin’s the principal and he and Jack are about to land a detention. 

“That’s great, thank you, Arin. Um, but, well Vernon has come up with an idea,” Jack says, glancing over at Vernon. 

Arin arches an eyebrow, his gaze turning from Jack to Vernon, “You did?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, practically squirming in his seat with Arin’s eyes on him, “I, well, I guess I decided that… _I’d_ marry Jack, you know, to keep him here.” 

Arin is quiet. He stares the two of them down, eyebrows furrowed in thought. Vernon’s heart starts racing. He’s putting a lot of himself on the line for this, to save Jack, and he knows it’s impulsive, but he’s sold himself on the idea and he’s worried that if too many people begin poking holes in it, highlighting all the ways it won’t work, that Vernon will give up and that Jack will be back to square one. 

“You’re serious?” Arin says. His face a solemn line. 

“I wouldn’t joke about this,” Vernon says firmly. 

Arin’s lips purse and he runs a hand over the top of his head, smoothing the little flyaway hairs that are poking out from his messy ponytail.

“So,” he says, moving his finger back and forth between Jack and Vernon, “You two have been…?” 

“No!” Vernon says, his face growing hot and his words too loud and sharp in the room, loud enough to have Jack jumping at his side, “No! I just…I just want to help him out. I’m not seeing anyone and Jack’s one of my best friends. I just…I thought it would be easy. I want to help him, Arin. I don’t want him to go home.” 

“We all want to help him,” Arin says, “But we have to be reasonable about this.” 

Vernon nods, feels shame wash over him, his face getting red, but he holds firm. 

“I know this seems crazy. I was reading a bunch of shit online and every website says one of the fastest ways for an immigrant to stay in the country is to get married, you know, get their green card. Jack and I can stay married long enough for him to get his green card and then we’ll get divorced and everything will go on like it always has and Jack doesn’t have to worry about renewing his Visa anymore.” 

Arin is quiet, studying them. He flips his gaze from Vernon to Jack. 

“Jack? You’re fine with this?” 

It really is all up to Jack. Vernon can volunteer as much as he wants, but if Jack isn’t into the idea then Vernon can’t do anything. It felt like his life that he’d get turned down even when he’s pretending to ask someone to marry him, his romantic bad-luck a constant for him. 

“It’s a lot to ask. I don’t want to derail Vernon’s life. I don’t want to make trouble for him, or you, or anyone else, but I don’t want to leave either. I love it here, I want to stay.” 

Arin sighs and sets his hands down on the desk in front of him. 

“Look, marriage is serious. It’s not a game. It’s hard work and it can suck sometimes. I don’t want to make a mockery of this, but at the same time I want Jack to stay here too. If we go through with this then we’ll have to be serious about it. It has to look real. Hell, Ross and Holly really were in love and getting married and they still had a hard time trying to prove that their marriage was for love, so we have our work cut out for us.” 

Arin taking it seriously makes it feel realer. If everything goes according to plan he and Jack are going to get _married_. The commitment of it feels distant, a far-off repercussion of a choice he’s making now. Vernon knows he needs Arin’s approval, he needs to make it real to someone other than he and Jack so he can’t welch out on the decision. He’s in it now. 

“All we can do is try,” Vernon says, “And I’m willing to try if you are?” he asks, tilting his head to look at Jack. 

Jack, with his dark hair pulled into a small bun, long pieces slipping loose and falling into his eyes. He smiles, nods, “I’m willing to try.” 

“Well, shit,” Arin says, “I guess we’re planning a wedding then.” 

\--

As it turns out the news of the impending wedding spreads fast through the office. Not everyone thinks it’s a great idea. Suzy is pretty resistant until Vernon tells her she can take the reins on the wedding planning. He has no clue where to begin on planning a wedding and even less of an idea on how to make their fake wedding look real. 

“I still don’t think this is the safest idea,” Suzy says, “But I can make it look believable.” She buys a thick white binder and sits at her desk, starting to sort out the details.

Brian and Ross are also big proponents that this is a bad idea. Brian because of logic and potential legal trouble and Ross because he’s been through the experience once before. 

“I hope you two are in this for the long haul because they’re going to be checking in on you and shit,” Ross says, “I can help you, Holly too, give you some tips, but it was a little easier for us. We’re actually in love.” 

Vernon flushes. He loves Jack, he does, just not in the same way that Ross loves Holly. 

“So, you’re saying we’ve got to use our acting skills?” Jack says, smiling. Now that the threat of him being deported in a week or so seems less likely, he’s slowly easing back into his usual self, the Jack that Vernon is used to. 

“Yeah, which is easy for you because you like that sort of thing, but what about him?” Ross says, nodding towards Vernon. 

Vernon fidgets under the combined force of Jack and Ross’ gazes. He’ll embarrass himself online for humor and for charity, he’ll act stupid and let Brian post it on Instagram, but acting like Jack’s husband is a whole other ballpark. It reminds him of high school and those dumb plays where suddenly you’re paired up with one of your friends and they’re expecting a kiss. 

“I’ll be fine,” Vernon says, squaring his shoulders. 

“You’ll be fine kissing Jack?” 

“I could do a lot worse, honestly,” Vernon says, bumping his shoulder against Jack’s. He watches Jack grin, swears he sees a faint pink to his cheeks. 

“Oh my God, maybe you are gonna be fine after all.” 

Vernon snorts and Jack lets out a nervous giggle. 

“Whatever coaching you have, we’ll take it,” Jack says, patting Ross on the shoulder. 

“The kissing I can’t help you with. You’ll have to figure that out on your own.” 

“Hey, Jack!” Barry calls from his office, his head peeking out the door, “Arin wants to know if you want to do a lunch run?” 

“Yeah, I can,” Jack says, he nods towards Ross and gives Vernon a gentle pat on the back as he strides towards Barry, “I’ll be back!” he calls back to Ross and Vernon. 

Life in the office has resumed as normal with the wedding in place, it’s just laced with this energy, this hyper giddiness that has swooped in and replaced the sadness and worry that had hung around them like a tangible fog. Vernon feels more relaxed, more focused, like everything will be okay. He’s naturally jaded and cynical, but he’s optimistic about this, about this working out the way he wants it to. 

Vernon is at his desk working when Jack approaches him. 

“Hey, I wanted to know what you wanted for lunch?” 

“Oh,” Vernon says, stretching as he leans back in his chair, his arms and back sore from staying in the same spot too long, “Hmm, where you going?” 

“Dan, Arin, and Barry want Thai. Ross, Brian, Matt and Ryan want sushi. Suzy and I want burgers.” 

“We just love to make your life harder don’t we?” Vernon teases, smiling up at Jack. 

“Yeah, if only you could all eat the same thing.” 

“Well, I’m going to make it mildly harder by telling you that I don’t know what I want yet.” 

Jack sighs, “You want me to surprise you?” 

“How about I just come with you? I could use a break and it’ll give me more time to think about what I want in the car.” 

“Yeah?” Jack says, blinking in surprise, “You can afford to leave for a bit? Isn’t the game keeping you busy?” 

“They won’t miss me for an hour or so,” Vernon says as he stands from his chair.

Jack’s keys jangle in his fingers as he smiles at Vernon, “Alright, let’s go.” 

\--

Five minutes later the two of them are in Jack’s car. He’s got a soundtrack to a musical playing softly in the background, Jack humming along to the music that’s unrecognizable to Vernon. California is bright and warm around them. Vernon’s glad to get out of the office for a little while, but as soon as they hit the mid-afternoon L.A. traffic he almost regrets his decision. 

“So,” Jack says, his fingers tapping out a lazy beat against the steering wheel, “This whole marriage thing.” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “What about it?” he’s nervous to hear Jack bringing it up. There’s a certain sense of awkwardness that comes with the knowledge that soon he and Jack will be a married couple. 

Jack licks his lips, “We’re really going to do it?” 

Vernon is surprised Jack is still asking. Did everyone just assume that Vernon was going to change his mind? To promise this help only to back out? 

“If you want it. I told you I would do it, and I don’t intend to leave you in the lurch, Jack.”

“I trust you,” Jack says, “I promise I do. I just know this is a big thing. It’s a life-changing thing.” 

“I know,” Vernon says, peering out the window, watching the slow crawl of traffic around them. He understands what kind of task he’s taking on. 

“And well, I guess if we’re going to do this we do have things to discuss.” 

“Like what?” Vernon asks, turning his head to look at Jack, “Our favorite flowers?” 

“Like, are we going to tell our parents? Our families? Our friends?” 

Vernon deflates. Shit. He hadn’t thought of that. Sometimes his life with the Grumps feels so far removed from his upbringing, from his parents. Vernon’s parents are supportive in general, but he also comes from a strict republican household and while he’s shed those bigotries that he once believed in, he can’t imagine his dad would be thrilled to learn he was marrying a man. His mom might handle it marginally better, but she also cried when she found out that Vernon had gotten his first tattoo, so he didn’t know what to expect from either of them. 

“What will your parents think?” Vernon asks Jack. He met Jack’s older brother once when he came to California to visit with his wife. He seemed as fun-loving and free-spirited as Jack himself was, but Vernon didn’t know Jack’s parents, didn’t know what they would say or think. 

Jack shrugs, scrubs at his chin with his free hand while they’re stopped for traffic. 

“Don’t imagine they’d have much of a fuss. Me Ma might be a bit ticked that I didn’t tell her I was seeing someone and that she wasn’t invited to the wedding.” 

“They wouldn’t care if they thought you were gay?” Vernon asks, the question making his heart beat faster in his chest. 

“I don’t think so. My parents have always said they just want me to be happy. S’why they were fine with me leaving for California.” 

“Maybe,” Vernon says, turning back to the window, watching people flow down the sidewalks, shopping bags in hands, talking and laughing, going about their day, maybe having conversations as serious as the one he and Jack are having right now, “Maybe we just surprise everyone. We just like, post a picture on social media, like, ‘Surprise! Gay wedding!’” 

Jack laughs, bright and sharp, and Vernon’s stomach feels warm from the sound. 

“Well, it would surprise everyone wouldn’t it?” 

“We’d be the talk of Tumblr,” Vernon says, “They already think I’m screwing everyone in the office anyway.” 

“Being popular on Tumblr has always been a goal of mine, how did you know?” 

“That’s a part of my job, having my pulse on the anxiety ridden heartbeat of the internet.” 

The traffic around them begins to move again. Vernon’s thankful for it because his stomach is growling with hunger even if he’s not sure what he wants to eat yet. 

“Alright, so, we’re going to post a picture to Twitter or something. What else do you think about the wedding?” 

Vernon had been a guest at dozens of weddings this year. It felt like everyone in his age bracket was pairing off, getting married, and Vernon still sat alone and single, scrambling to find a date to all these different weddings and then drinking himself stupid to avoid the heavy weight in his gut, the voice in his head that says; _‘Why are you still alone? What’s wrong with you?’_

Despite being to all these weddings Vernon never put much thought or stock into what he would want for his own. It felt stupid to think about it, very like putting the carriage ahead of the horse, counting his ducks before they hatched, whatever you wanted to say. It felt too odd to plan a wedding when he couldn’t even land himself a steady girlfriend. 

“I guess I never really thought about it,” Vernon says, “I didn’t think I’d be getting married any time soon.” 

“Yeah,” Jack says, “I’ve had some thoughts, but you know, it’s more for my _real_ wedding and not this one.” 

Vernon isn’t sure why but Jack’s words sting. He isn’t wrong, this wedding is fake and Vernon would never expect it to be treated as a huge event that fulfils every wish and dream that either of them have ever had about what their weddings would be like, but something about it isn’t sitting well with Vernon. He volunteered to be a place-holder, to be a sham husband, why the hell is he letting his feelings get hurt now? 

“Good thing we have Suzy, yeah?” Jack says, glancing at Vernon to gauge the sudden silence in the car. Vernon realizes belatedly that he was too caught up in his head to remember to answer. 

“Yeah,” he says, bringing himself back to the here and now, in the car with Jack, going to get lunch, “She’ll do most of the leg work throwing together a wedding in, like, a week.” 

Jack flicks his blinker, turning left into the parking lot of their familiar Thai place. 

“Guess I’ll have to rent a tux again.” 

“Shit, don’t feel like you have to wear a tux on my account. You can show up in your pajamas if that’s your thing.” 

Jack laughs, his smile so wide and happy as he parks the car, “Yeah, but we want it to look real, right? How many people are out there getting married in their pajamas?” 

“You never know! You don’t know how other people live. People get married in _fursuits_ , dude.” 

“I don’t know what a fursuit is,” Jack says. He unbuckles the seatbelt and fishes in the pocket of his hoodie, pulling out a crumpled white sheet of paper that serves as the orders he’s supposed to be picking up here, “You coming?” 

“Count yourself lucky,” Vernon says, “And yeah, I’ll come help.” He follows suit and unbuckles his seatbelt before getting out of the car and following Jack up to the restaurant. 

Vernon holds the door open for Jack to pass through, the bells jangling overhead as the two of them walk inside. The slender man behind the counter smiles when he sees Jack. 

“Hello Jack!” he chirps. 

“We order from here too much, don’t we?” Vernon says. 

“Are you kidding? You guys are my best customers!” the man says, grabbing two heavy plastic bags of food and setting them down on the counter. 

“I’ll pass that on to my boss,” Jack says, handing the man the company credit card. 

As the food is being paid for Vernon scans the restaurant. It’s well-lit, a smaller restaurant with one or two tables crammed into the corner next to a standing cooler stocked with drinks. A huge white vase is set in the corner next to the window, big fuchsia colored flowers filling the vase. 

“Those are pretty,” Vernon says, nodding towards the vase. 

Jack follows the line of his eyes and raises an eyebrow, “What? For the wedding?” 

Vernon shrugs, “Do we need flowers? It’s not like either one of us is going to carry a bouquet, right?” 

“Wedding? Are you getting married?” The man asks, handing back the card to Jack, his face kind and smiling, but Vernon freezes up. He forgot they were in public, within earshot of others who don’t know their situation. 

“Yeah,” Jack says easily, tucking the card away, “Soon actually.” 

“Congratulations!” The man says, “Do you need a caterer or anything?” 

Jack laughs and Vernon feels an odd mix of elated and embarrassed. There was no issue, no trouble with Jack admitting they were two men who were getting married. Vernon wasn’t sure what he was expecting, maybe some looks, cruel words, things he has read about, had friends tell him horror stories about. He knows this isn’t always easy, that he doesn’t know one single fraction of the kind of hardships that real gay couples actually face, men who aren’t pretending, who are in love, who want to get married for _real_ and can’t just slip a mask on and off. 

“I think we’ll be okay. It’s a small affair,” Jack says, his hand settling on top of Vernon’s where it’s sitting on the counter. Jack’s hand is warm and soft and it takes everything Vernon has not to shake him off out of embarrassment, not because Jack is another guy, but because Vernon’s always been bad with public displays of affection outside of openly praising his friends. 

“Alright, well, I’m going to put a card in here in case you change your mind,” the man says, slipping a little paper card into one of the bags, “Congratulations again, Jack and…” he trails off, his eyes slipping to Vernon. 

“Oh, I’m Vernon,” he says, offering the man the hand that isn’t covered by Jack’s.

“Nice to meet you,” The man says, “You treat Jack well, okay?” 

Vernon laughs, his cheeks getting hot, “I wouldn’t dream of doing anything else.” 

“Alright,” Jack says, lifting one of the bags into his hand, Vernon picking up the other, “We should head back before the traffic gets worse.” 

Just as they had come into the restaurant, Vernon follows Jack back out and towards his car. There is something that feels very domestic about picking up food together, even if none of it is for them. Jack and Vernon nestle the bags of Thai food into the backseat before heading to the local sushi place for the next round of orders. 

“See, we got this,” Jack says. 

“Yeah, so far so good,” Vernon says, “Hopefully Immigration won’t be harder than the local Thai restaurant.” 

\--

He and Jack stop and grab sushi, the order smaller this time so Jack leaves Vernon in the car while he pops into the restaurant to grab the orders. Their next stop is the Coney Island and by the time they take off Vernon’s stomach is growling. Jack’s orders a burger and fries and Vernon winds up ordering the same. He doesn’t know the place and doesn’t trust a good majority of the menu, opting to follow Jack’s lead and order what he says is good. 

Finally, the lunches are all collected and Jack and Vernon head back to the office. 

“This was a little easier when we didn’t have as many people,” Jack says, “Now it takes a bit longer.” 

“Everyone appreciates what you do for us and how hard you work, just so you know.” 

Jack smiles, “Thanks, but I could say the same about you? All of you really.” 

The rest of the car ride is quiet and comfortable and by the time they get back to the office Jack’s got Vernon humming along to one of the songs off the musical soundtrack. 

\--

If Vernon thought organizing a charity livestream or working out the fine details of a Grumps live show was a challenge it was nothing compared to a wedding. He can only imagine how much harder it would be if it was a proper wedding, like the ones he usually attends, with their lavish decorations, expensive food, and endless decision making. 

Even though the wedding they are throwing isn’t real it still has to look like it is. Suzy snags both Vernon and Jack the second she comes into the office, sequestering them to one of the dining tables, her thick white binder opened in front of her telling them, “We have five days. We need to work on this.” 

They have made a few decisions already. The wedding is going to be held on a hiking trail in the Verdugo Mountain that Vernon often takes his bike rides by. He had been the one to suggest it and he was surprised that Jack hadn’t argued about it. They had decided a guest list as well. The Grumps were going to be the main attendees as well as other mutual friends. It all felt real, it was happening, fuck, Vernon was going to get _married_. 

“What are we thinking for decorations?” Suzy asks, peering at them from her book. The wedding binder is like a planner gone haywire. She’s got clippings from wedding magazines in plastic sleeves, sheets with seating arrangements, hand-written notes of food ideas and their corresponding prices jotted on a sheet of paper, the whole shebang. Vernon’s pretty impressed. 

“I dunno,” Jack says, “We’ll be outside so what can we do?” 

“Flowers,” Suzy says, her eyes sparkling, “Buttloads of flowers.” 

“Oh!” Jack says suddenly, drawing looks from both Suzy and Vernon, “Vernon liked those flowers yesterday…what were they, Vern? The big purple ones, right?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “I did like those.” He’s surprised that Jack remembers such a little thing, a detail that had slipped even Vernon’s mind. 

Suzy hums. She picks up her phone and taps something out. She turns it to face Vernon, “These?” 

There’s a photo of the same flowers Vernon had saw in the vase at the Thai restaurant yesterday with Jack. 

“Yeah, it’s those!” Jack says excitedly. He nudges Vernon with his elbows, “Those, right?” 

“Yeah, that’s the one,” Vernon says. 

“Those are orchids,” Suzy says, “We could definitely get them if you guys wanted them?”

“Only if it works,” Vernon says. 

Suzy flips a few pages in her binder, “Of course it’ll work. We’ll put orchids out and get fairy lights, it’ll be like a whole enchanted forest theme! Now, have you considered a cake?” 

Three hours later mostly everything for the wedding is squared away and Suzy jumps on the task of ordering everything they’ll need. Vernon slumps into a nearby bean bag. His head pounding. He feels so overwhelmed. Weddings were hard as hell and when all was said and done and Jack had his green card he didn’t want to think about the possibility of doing this all again someday, though by then, he might have someone who will take the reins and let him skate by on his minimal opinions. 

Jack had a knack for including Vernon in every decision, not wanting to make it solely on his own. Vernon appreciates that Jack isn’t going ‘bridezilla’ on him, but there are certain things he could care less about. He doesn’t care what color vases the purple orchids are going to go in, he doesn’t know if they should have circular or round tables for the reception, or what price range the wedding cake should be in. It isn’t that the wedding isn’t important to him, it is, because it’s the one thing that can save Jack. He just wants it to happen, he doesn’t really care how. 

At this rate, he’ll be glad when the wedding is taken care of and put behind them. Vernon’s resting, his eyes closed, when he hears footsteps approaching him. He doesn’t open his eyes but he goes tense, wondering if it’s Brian and if he’s being recorded right now for a future Instagram post. The footsteps stop and then Vernon hears the quiet hush of a voice.

“Are you sleeping?” 

It’s Jack. Vernon cracks his eyes open and Jack is standing in front of him, his face soft as he takes in Vernon. 

“No, just feeling overwhelmed, I guess? This is a lot.” 

“I know,” Jack says, he pads to the side of bean bag, “You mind?” 

“No, go ahead,” Vernon says, pushing himself up on his elbows. He watches Jack settle down on the floor next to the bean bag. 

“Next time, I’m gonna let the lass do whatever she wants.” 

Vernon laughs, but he feels something odd in his chest. Jack is so handsome, so good looking, he could get any girl he wants. Vernon’s been out with Jack to bars, to the occasional show, and the girls fawn over him. Jack’s always good about it, treats them with respect, rarely takes a girl home for just a one-night fling. Vernon’s not jealous; fuck, well maybe he is. Maybe he wants to attract girls as easily as Jack does, wants to be effortlessly charming, outgoing, to not worry about what others say or think about him. 

Whenever he looks ahead he can’t picture himself in a relationship, can’t see himself with a girlfriend or eventually a wife. Not because he doesn’t want one, but because he can’t form the other person in his imagination, can’t comprehend what it would feel like to trust someone that much, to know hands-down that you were going to stay with that person forever. 

“Vernon?” Jack asks. 

“Sorry,” Vernon says, “I’m listening but I’m just drained.” 

“I get it,” Jack says, “I’ll let you rest, buddy.” He pats Vernon on the shoulder before he pushes up off the floor and heads back to the more productive side of the office. 

Vernon wants to thank him. Thank him for checking in, for noticing that Vernon wasn’t around, for coming to find him. He wants to thank Jack, but he doesn’t. He lets Jack walk away and he settles back on to the bean bag, letting his eyes fall closed as his mind works through the mayhem that has become this week of his life. 

\--

The days leading up to the wedding pass quickly. Suzy’s in full work mode, showing Vernon and Jack photos of what she bought, she and Arin making frequent trips to Target. Vernon’s been feeling a lot of guilt about letting the wedding pass by without telling his parents. He’s had a group text open on his phone for days. In small quiet moments, he’s typed it out; _‘I’m getting married on Saturday.’_ But he’s never been able to hit ‘Send’ to confirm it. 

He does text his older brother. He and Tim have always been close and Vernon trusts him. He keeps it simple, a text reading: _‘I’m doing something stupid.’_

_‘Getting that pineapple pizza tattoo after all?’_

_‘I’m getting married this weekend. Please don’t tell mom and dad.’_

Vernon’s phone buzzes in his hand. It’s Tim. Which, Vernon should have expected. He sighs and slides the answer button to pick-up.

“You’re _what_?” Tim asks, not even giving Vernon time to say hello. 

“I’m getting married.” 

“To _who_?” Tim asks. 

“Uh, my friend from work…Jack?” 

“Vernon, Jack sounds an awful lot like a boy’s name.” 

Vernon rolls his eyes. “It is, Tim.” 

“So, do you have a second announcement to make besides the wedding?” 

“No,” Vernon says, sighing, “Jack is here on a Visa. He’s got some issues going on and he might be deported. I…I offered to marry him to keep him here. He deserves to be here. He’s my friend and I want to help him.” 

“Shit, Vernon,” Tim says, “This is serious…and a little stupid.” 

“I know,” Vernon says, fiddling with the frayed hem of his jean shorts, “But I’m still going to do it.” 

“And it’s this Saturday?” Tim asks. 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “I know it’s sudden but he doesn’t have a lot of time.” 

“Well,..I’m not going to tell mom and dad,” Tim says, “But I will see you on Saturday.” 

“What?” Vernon asks, “You’re coming to the wedding?” 

“Of course! I’m not going to miss my little brother’s wedding. Besides, if you need it to look real someone from your family should be there, right?” 

Vernon can’t argue with the logic and it feels good to imagine Tim there with him, to have someone from his family know the truth. 

“Right,” Vernon says, “Do you think mom and dad are going to hate me?” 

“No,” Tim says, “Not hate…but maybe you’ll be uninvited from Thanksgiving this year for hiding it.” 

Vernon groans, thumping his head back against the arm of his couch. Tim laughs. 

“Alright, I gotta call a man about a tux. I’ll see you Saturday,” Tim says before he hangs up. 

Vernon sighs and opens his texts, tapping Jack’s name and typing out a message: _My brother’s coming to the wedding._. 

\--

The night before the wedding Vernon’s lying in bed, Michael a warm ball on his chest, her paws up near his face. Vernon pets her head, runs his hand down the sleek black fur of her back while she purrs against him, the vibrations rumbling into Vernon’s chest. For a long time, it’s just been him and Michael in his tiny apartment. Her being the constant staple of affection in his life.

“Mike, Michael, listen up. I gotta tell you something,” Vernon says, skritching his fingers along Michael’s ears. She mewls a response at him, “Well, I’m getting married tomorrow…to Jack. You don’t know Jack that well, but don’t worry, he’s a really nice guy. I don’t want you to worry though because this isn’t going to change anything between us. I’m still going to be your dad. You don’t have to call Jack Dad if you don’t want to.” 

Michael blinks at him before she butts her head against his hand, signaling she wants more pets. 

“I just wanted to give you a head’s up, you know? It’s scary but I’m here for you.” 

Michael wiggles forward, her paw pressing against his chin before she leans in and licks at Vernon’s face. He laughs, rubs at her ear and lets the anxiety about tomorrow ease out of him. Arin and Suzy wanted to make this as simple as possible for everyone involved. Suzy and the team she hired are heading to the hiking trail early in the morning to set it up. The wedding is at three and all Vernon has to do is change into his clothes and meet Jack and the others there. 

His outfit is already hanging up on the back of his bathroom door. He’s not doing a full tuxedo, instead, Vernon is wearing a pale blue button-down shirt and a grey colored vest with matching dress pants and tie. For a long time, he lies in his bed and stares at the outline of the clothes, bagged and hanging from the door. He’s nervous but not regretful of his choice or decision. 

“Some bachelor party this is, right, Mike?” Vernon says. 

Michael starts to knead his shirt and Vernon hums. He picks up his phone and opens his text conversation with Jack. 

_’You ready for tomorrow?’_ he sends to Jack. 

_’Oh, yeah. Celebrating my last night of single-hood with strippers and booze, you know how it goes.’_

Vernon smiles. _’Better than mine. Mike and I are just chilling.’_

_’Kevin offered to take me out but I turned him down. Rather stay home to be bright-eyed for the wedding.’_

_’Guess we’re both lame asses then’_

_’Soon we’ll be that boring married couple’_

Vernon smiles at his phone, his heart speeding up in his chest. He’s nervous, but it’s something else, some warmth under the surface. He’s glad Jack’s not doing anything tonight and that the two of them can talk like this. Out of everyone Jack is the one person who understands how Vernon’s feeling, who is going to experience the same thing as him tomorrow. 

\--

The next morning Vernon wakes up to his alarm clock sounding and a loud knocking coming from his front door. He jerks up and grabs at his phone, silencing the alarm as he stumbles clumsily through his apartment, “Hang on!” Vernon calls, dancing around Michael as she tries to slink around his ankles. Vernon gets to the door and tugs it open revealing his older brother standing there. 

Tim is dressed in a clean white button down with a black tie and tan pants. He pushes his dark sunglasses off his face and on the top of his head. 

“You’re not already getting ready?” Tim asks. 

“What are you doing here?” Vernon croaks, “When you said you’d see me Saturday I thought you meant _at_ the wedding.” 

“I’m here to help you get ready for your big day!” Tim says, sliding into the apartment and allowing Vernon to shut the door behind him. Michael winds herself first around Vernon’s feet and then Tim’s, “Mike, Uncle Tim can’t pick you up today. You’ll get fur all over me.” 

“The wedding isn’t until three,” Vernon says, rubbing at his eyes, “And it isn’t a _real_ wedding.” 

Vernon appreciates the support and he feels a little less lonely having someone from his family here. He chose this but he didn’t expect it to feel so isolating, like he couldn’t tell anyone outside of his circle of friends. 

“So, since I’m here early how about you throw some clothes on and we go get breakfast?” Tim asks. 

Vernon can’t argue with the offer of breakfast so he nods and pads back to his bedroom to put on some shorts and a t-shirt and Tim driving the two of them to the nearest café so he and Vernon could grab some coffee and breakfast burritos. 

He and Tim are sitting at one of the metal circular tables outside of the café enjoying the bright and warm sunlight of the day. 

“So,” Tim says, taking a sip of his coffee, “are you sure this wedding isn’t your way of coming out to the family or?” 

“No,” Vernon says, setting his burrito down, “I’m not coming out. I told you I’m marrying Jack to keep him in the country.”

“Fair enough, but are you attracted to him?” Tim asks, calm, like, he’s trying to choose his words carefully. 

“No!” Vernon says, nervous laughter bubbling out of him, “You know I’ve only dated girls.” 

“I know, but just because you’ve always dated girls doesn’t mean that you also can’t be attracted to guys,” Tim says, “I believe they call that bisexual, Vernon.” 

Vernon sighs into his coffee, “Didn’t we already have this conversation?” 

“I’m just trying to help,” Tim says. 

If Vernon is being completely honest with himself then he’s felt attraction to men before, has objectively found men handsome, has idly wondered what kissing them would feel like, but he’s mostly chalked that up to experimenting in college and shedding the skin of his republican upbringing. He doesn’t want to admit it to Tim now, feels like it would make his cause that much harder to stand behind. 

Tim isn’t asking about just any guy. He’s asking about _Jack_ and Vernon hardly wants to admit it to himself but he knows Jack’s attractive, the entire office does. Matt and Ryan are always making jokes about Jack looking like ‘Ryan Gosling’ and referring to him as such as he works in the office. Jack is attractive, but he won’t tell Tim that. 

“I appreciate the help,” Vernon tells his brother, “I do, but Jack is my friend and nothing more. It’d be easier if we were actually together. There would be way less to worry about, but we’re not and this is just to keep him here, like I told you before.” 

“Alright,” Tim says, “I guess, I’m just trying to let you know that I’m here for you. That I always will be, through your sham marriages and any other crises in your life.” 

“I appreciate it, man,” Vernon says, prickling at the weird sentimental moment between the two of them. He picks up his paper coffee cup and raises it in the air, beckoning Tim to meet him half-way. Tim mimics the movement and they toast with their cups. 

“To your wedding,” Tim says, winking at Vernon. 

Vernon laughs, “Okay, sure.” 

\--

After breakfast Vernon and Tim head back to the apartment where Vernon begins getting dressed for the wedding. As he tugs off his t-shirt and tosses it into the laundry basket in his room he can feel threads of anxiety winding around his spine, slinking upwards into his stomach like a living, breathing animal that’s determined to devour Vernon from the inside out. 

Vernon puts on his dress shirt. He’s about to button it up when he hears his cell phone chime from where it’s lying on the mattress in his room. Vernon pads over to the bed and grabs his phone, swiping to unlock it. There’s a text from Jack with a picture attached. Vernon smiles and he opens the message. 

_‘Wedding day!’_ Jack’s message reads along with a photo of Jack from his snapchat, shirtless, hair a tousled mess like he had just gotten out of the shower. 

There’s a zing of something that skitters across Vernon’s skin, a feeling he can’t place. Maybe it’s a little bit of pride? The idea that it’s something he and Jack are sharing, like a secret between them or maybe it’s just that Jack is sending this to him, that Jack is thinking about him, and that Jack doesn’t seem scared. 

Vernon hits the reply button and then opens his camera to snap a picture of himself. He goes to his typical, tongue out, eyes closed, his shirt hanging open and unbuttoned, a line of his tanned stomach showing. He takes the picture and then quickly sends it off to Jack. He’s growing more and more comfortable with his body, not embarrassed by it, but he still waits with nerves in his stomach, working the buttons on the shirt, waiting to see how Jack will respond. 

Jack doesn’t text back until Vernon’s got his shirt all buttoned up. Vernon will never admit how fast he scoops up his phone to check the message. 

_‘Looking good. My outfit is going to be a surprise.’_

Vernon laughs, and taps out his reply: _‘Looking forward to seeing it. I’d better finish getting ready. See you soon, Jack.’_

Jack doesn’t reply this time and Vernon finishes getting ready. He slides on his vest and pants and Tim comes into the room to help Vernon with his tie. Once Vernon’s all done dressing Tim pats him on the shoulder. 

“You ready, bro?” 

Vernon nods but his stomach feels sick, “Yeah, as ready as I’ll ever be.” 

Tim drives Vernon to the hiking trail, Vernon getting texts from Arin and Suzy, making sure he remembered the time, making sure he’s on his way. 

_‘Do we have a Runaway Bride situation?’_ Dan asks. 

_‘Why do I have to be Julia Roberts?’_ Vernon replies. 

_‘Because you’d look better in the dress.’_ Dan sends, adding on a winking face emoji. 

The closer they get to the hiking trail, to the wedding, the more Vernon’s stomach flutters. He reminds himself that it’s not real, it’s fake, it’s not _real_ , but no matter how many times he says it, it doesn’t stop him from feeling anxious, from the butterflies erupting inside of him. 

Tim parks in the dirt packed lot next to the various cars of his friends. The walk to the wedding is half-way up the trail in a little clearing that shows an overlook to the city. Suzy has a wooden sign planted in the grass at the beginning of the hill that reads: _‘Shaw-Walsh Wedding’_ and an arrow guiding the guests up the slope. 

“The hyphenating is a nice touch,” Tim says as he and Vernon begin the trek up the hill. 

“Yeah, we settled on that pretty easy.” It just made sense to keep their last names together so no one had to drastically change their names. 

The day around them is bright and hot and the small trek up the hill is making Vernon sweat in his dress clothes. The downfall to an outdoor wedding in California is the extreme heat. Maybe he and Jack should have opted for an indoor wedding where there was air conditioning. 

Once they reach the top of the clearing – following the signs along the way – the scenery changes. Suzy was true to her word and had transformed the clearing into something out of a fairy tale, which wasn’t exactly the way Vernon pictured his wedding aesthetic but he’s still blown away by her efforts. There are white fairy lights strung up, twisted around the branches of the trees that surround the clearing, soft beige colored vases set around the edge with the huge purple orchids that Vernon had noticed at the Thai place with Jack. 

Someone had erected an arch with the same purple flowers woven through the wooden slates. There were thin white wooden chairs set up along the back of the clearing, separated in the middle to create a walkway of sorts, an aisle for Jack and Vernon to walk down. 

“I’m gonna find a seat,” Tim says, moving away from Vernon to go pick one of the wooden chairs, “See you on the other side, Vern.” 

Vernon gives his brother a salute. He glances around the clearing but he doesn’t see Jack. And here Dan was making cold feet jokes about Vernon. He doesn’t think Jack would be a no show at the one event that’s going to keep him in the country, but Vernon would feel better if he saw him, if he knew maybe Jack felt as odd about this as Vernon is feeling. 

A hand claps him on the shoulder and Vernon jumps. He sees Arin standing next to him in a white dress shirt and black pants, his hair pulled back in a sleek ponytail. 

“I know we didn’t do a rehearsal but this is simple. You’re going to stand at the arch and then when the wedding starts Jack will meet you there and we’ll begin the ceremony.” 

“Wait, did we get someone to officiate?” Vernon asks. The last he knew that was the one role that Arin and Suzy were having trouble filling. 

Arin grins, “Yeah, we got someone, don’t worry.” 

Judging by the smirk on Arin’s face Vernon should be extremely worried. He takes his position at the arch, the trees surrounding the area doing well to block out the sun from hitting him in the face. Slowly, the guests begin to arrive; the other grumps, the photographer that Suzy hired – because Ross kept telling them all how important photo documentation was – mutual friends. Soon all of the small chairs are full and the ceremony will start any time. 

Vernon feels sick and nervous standing in front of the arch, everyone’s eyes on him as they wait for the wedding to begin. He’s not good with so many people watching him, with everyone paying attention to every move he makes. 

Suddenly, Brian comes out from the nearby trees and he walks up the aisle towards Vernon. 

“Oh no,” Vernon says, an idea forming in his head, one that scares the shit out of him, “Don’t tell me…” 

“That I’m officiating your wedding? You know it!” Brian says, taking off his sunglasses and tucking them into the breast pocket of his suit jacket. 

“Oh my God.” 

“You should be honored. I took a five-hour online course and paid thirty-five bucks to do this for you and Jack.” 

“I’m feeling a lot of things, but honored isn’t one of them.” 

Brian smiles, waves to the crowd sitting before them, his eyes shifting to Vernon, “I’m not going to ruin your fake wedding, don’t worry.” 

It’s easier said than done as all Vernon feels is worry. What if he and Jack aren’t convincing enough? What if they put in all this effort and it still falls apart and Jack still has to leave? In the distance Vernon can see the wedding photographer lining up to take a shot, he tries his hardest not to let the fears bubbling in his chest show through. 

Finally, after what feels like an hour of standing up and waiting for the wedding to begin, the ceremony actually starts. Vernon is still standing in front of the arch, Brian next to him, centered perfectly under it. Dan is serving as Vernon’s best man and he stands in his navy colored suit behind Vernon. The other grumps are seated in the first row along with Tim and a couple of Jack’s friends that Vernon recognizes only by face and maybe from meeting them once inside of a crowded and noisy bar in downtown L.A. 

From the side of the clearing music starts playing. It’s a light and whimsical little tune and Vernon’s stomach squeezes. As far as he can tell it’s coming from a speaker that someone had hidden in the foliage surrounding the clearing. Once the music kicks up everyone is peering around behind them, looking towards the entrance of the clearing, Vernon following their gazes until he spots people at the opening of the aisle. 

It’s not Jack, but it’s Rachel and Audrey. They’re both wearing dresses and the little girl is carrying a dark wicker basket of flower petals, a delicate crown of daisies on her curly-haired head. She laughs as she takes huge scoops of flowers and drops them along the aisle, earning ‘awws’ from the guests watching her. She makes it all the way down to Brian and he takes the basket from her hand, kisses her on the top of her head, whispering praise. 

“You did such a good job. Go see mommy now, okay?” and he turns her towards Rachel who takes her hand and leads her back to their seats. 

Next Kevin and his girlfriend are walking down the aisle. Kevin is serving as Jack’s best man and he smiles proudly as they make their way towards the arch. Kevin’s girlfriend slips away from him at the end of the aisle and takes her seat in the front row while Kevin stands across from Vernon, waiting for Jack to arrive. He smiles at Vernon from across the arch and Vernon smiles back nervously. 

A few beats later the music changes to the standard Wedding March and Vernon finally spots Jack and Arin standing at the opening of the aisle. Jack’s arm is linked with Arin’s and he’s grinning huge and wide as they begin their walk down the aisle and towards the arch. Jack’s wearing a full tuxedo, standard black, like he rented when the Grumps had their art gallery show. His hair is far from the tousled mess it had been when he sent Vernon the selfie just a few hours ago. He looks devastatingly handsome and Vernon all at once feels inadequate in his less formal outfit and gets that weird zing of pride that _he’s_ the one marrying Jack, even if it isn’t real. 

Arin and Jack reach the arch and Arin pulls Jack into a hug, squeezing him around the middle. Jack laughs and pats Arin’s back, “Thanks, man.” 

Arin pulls away and valiantly pretends not to be tearing up as he looks at Vernon. “Take care of my boy.” 

Vernon lets out a nervous giggle, as he nods, “You got it.” 

Then Arin is taking his seat and Jack is standing across from Vernon. Kevin grabs Jack’s shoulders and squeezes and Jack lets out a laugh that sounds as nervous as Vernon feels right now. The crowd around them takes their seats and Vernon can hear Brian take a breath. 

“We’re gathered here today to witness the marriage of Vernon Shaw and Jack Walsh. I’ve known them both for a while, both great guys, I couldn’t be happier for them.” 

Vernon is too aware of the crowd’s eyes, of the photographer snapping pictures, of the warm heat clinging to every inch of his body from the hot day. He feels like he might puke, might just bend over and upchuck the coffee and breakfast burrito he had this morning with Tim. It’s been a long time since Vernon’s had a panic attack. The last one being when he quit his job at Maker and accepted the position with the Grumps, but he can feel that tightness in his throat, his panicked mind, he can feel his heart racing way too fast, and Vernon wants to _run_ , just wants everyone to stop and give him a minute to breathe, to clear his head. 

Then, there are hands touching his and Vernon focuses back in. He sees Jack’s hand sliding over his own, cupping them gently as Vernon’s hands tremble in Jack’s loose hold. Jack is smiling, but his eyes are soft and inquisitive when they meet Vernon’s gaze. His thumb rubs against the back of Vernon’s hand in small comforting swipes. 

Vernon breathes, reels himself back in. He keeps his eyes locked with Jack’s as he brings himself back to the here and now. Jack doesn’t let him go, he holds steady to Vernon. 

“Can we have the rings, please?” Brian asks. 

Now, their hands do part. Vernon turns to face Dan, the older man pressing the simple gold ring into Vernon’s palm. Kevin doing the same for Jack on the other side. When he and Jack face each other again the nerves bubble out of Vernon. His body is both giddy and overwhelmed. It is such an odd feeling, but he tries to focus on only Jack, on the person right in front of him. This is for Jack, to help him. That’s all that matters. 

“Before we exchange the rings do the grooms have anything to say?” Brian asks. 

Vernon hadn’t written vows, hadn’t considered it, and the thought of winging a summary of his feelings for Jack seems terrifying. 

“I’ll say a little bit,” Jack says. 

Shit. If Jack is going to speak then Vernon will have to, he can’t look like the asshole that doesn’t care about his partner. 

“Vernon is a wonderful person, a great friend, smart and hilarious and I look up to him more than I think he knows. I trust him with everything I have and I always will. I don’t think there’s anyone I’d rather be doing this with.”

The audience ‘awws’ and Vernon feels like crying. He didn’t know Jack felt like that, didn’t know what Jack had told him. They’re friends and Jack means a lot to him – obviously he does, if he didn’t, Vernon wouldn’t even be doing this – but Jack’s words touch him, make him feel warm from the tips of his toes to the tops of his ears. 

Now, it’s Vernon’s turn and he licks his lips, tries not to focus on what he _should_ say and instead, as scary as it is, to say what he actually feels. 

“Jack is the type of person I want to be, the type of person we should all aspire to be. He’s kind in a world that so frequently isn’t. He’s a genius behind the camera, his work ethic is nuts. He’s one of my best friends in the entire world and I care about him endlessly.” 

“You’re gonna make me cry,” Jack says, wiping at his face, earning laughs from Vernon and everyone around them, everyone watching them, reminding Vernon that this moment doesn’t belong just to them, it belongs to everyone. 

As scary as it is to make himself feel vulnerable and to put himself out there, it feels good to let Jack know how much he cares about him, to hear what Jack thinks about him in return. It solidifies that bond, that idea that he and Jack are a team ready to tackle this challenge head-on. 

“Jack, Vernon, you can now exchange rings,” Brian says. 

Vernon offers Jack his hand and Jack slides the plain gold band on to Vernon’s finger, the metal warm from Jack holding it. Vernon takes Jack’s hand and mimics the movement, sliding the ring onto Jack’s finger. Their rings match, simple and gold, and surprisingly heavy on Vernon’s hand. 

“With these rings exchanged, you may now kiss your husband,” Brian says. 

Vernon’s heart leaps into his throat. He knew this part was coming but he hadn’t really considered how he was going to be having his first kiss with a man, with _Jack_ , right here and now in front of everyone. 

Jack steps close to Vernon and Vernon touches at Jack’s elbows. He breathes. _It’s like a play. Like a high school play._ Vernon reminds himself. It isn’t real. He leans in towards Jack and catches his mouth in a simple kiss. It’s strange to feel the scratch of facial hair against his chin and cheeks, but otherwise the kiss doesn’t feel much different than kissing a girl. 

Jack’s hands hold at Vernon’s sides as their mouths move together. Vernon is breathless, head spinning. This was all so fucking crazy, so weird, he didn’t feel like himself, didn’t feel like he knew how to be himself right now. 

The kiss breaks and Jack’s face is a soft pink. He bites his lip and smiles and it’s ridiculously cute. 

“I now pronounce you husbands!” Brian says, the crowd around them erupting into cheers. Jack slides his hand into Vernon’s, lacing their fingers together, grinning as Kevin pulls him into a side hug, Dan patting Vernon on the back. 

“We did it,” Jack whispers to Vernon. 

“Yeah, we pulled it off, I guess.” 

Vernon thought that since the main part of the wedding was over that things would slow down, but they don’t. Right after the main part of the ceremony Arin whisks Jack and Vernon over to Brian so they can sign the marriage license, the last official step to sealing the deal in their marriage. 

After the license is signed Suzy ushers them to the picnicking area a little further up the hill. They’re having pizza and cupcakes because it’s simple and easy and Vernon takes comfort in that simplicity of it all. He and Jack sit together along with Arin, and Dan, and Suzy. 

“You did a wonderful job, Suzy!” Jack says, patting her hand, the ring glinting in the bright afternoon sun. 

“I’m glad you guys liked it! The ceremony was beautiful.” 

“My girl’s a miracle worker,” Arin says, pressing a kiss to the top of Suzy’s head as she laughs and leans into his touch. 

“It made me think about our wedding and how much I loved it,” Suzy admits, her face a soft pink as she cuddles up to Arin. 

Vernon thinks about how Arin and Suzy are married and how he and Jack are in that club now, how they are parallels of each other, though Vernon couldn’t see himself being so affectionate with Jack, so casual in touch and tenderness as Arin and Suzy are. 

“Is it grounds for divorce if I don’t like pineapple on pizza?” Jack asks. As his pizza plate is delivered to him at the table. 

“Damn, that’s a deal-breaker. I wish you would have told me that _before_ the wedding.” 

Jack laughs and picks up his slice of pepperoni pizza before taking a bite. 

The wedding passes in a flurry of laughter, handshakes, pictures, and food. At one-point Jack and Vernon are pulled out onto the makeshift dance floor, which is just a patch of grass and the same speaker as before being used to play music. Brian chanting “First dance! First dance!” until Vernon and Jack give in and clasp hands. 

Vernon’s not one for dancing so Jack leads them in a slow dance which amounts to them swaying in a circle together in the clearing. 

“So, your surprise was a tuxedo? Not much of a surprise, I have to admit.” 

“Ah, the surprise isn’t the tux itself but what’s _underneath_ ,” Jack says. 

“ _What_?” Vernon asks. What was Jack saying? He laughs nervously.

“I wore something special under me tux.” 

“A cape? Special ‘something-blue’ undies?” 

Jack frees one of his hands and goes for the buttons on his dress shirt. He undoes the collar and enough of the buttons to reveal a white t-shirt underneath with the bright green words: _‘What’s the craic?’_ written across it. It takes Vernon a moment but he recognizes the shirt as the one that Jack had let him borrow for St. Patrick’s Day when they filmed Stout Train because Vernon didn’t own anything else green. 

Jack must see the look of confusion on Vernon’s face because he smooths his shirt closed and smiles, “You borrowed it from me before. So, it’s like _our_ shirt, I guess?” 

“Our ‘something-borrowed’ you might say?” Vernon asks. 

“I didn’t take you as one for those kinds who follows rules like that,” Jack says. He slides his arms up to rest over Vernon’s shoulders. Vernon isn’t sure where to put his hands so they end up at Jack’s waist, the two of them dancing like they were at a high school prom, swaying slowly in the slanting afternoon sun, the sky a golden landscape around them. 

Fuck if it isn’t all pretty romantic. Vernon’s been going with the flow, with the touches, sinking into them as comfort and less about it being sexualized. If they weren’t acting, if this wasn’t happening, he doesn’t think he’d ever naturally do this with Jack, but he isn’t complaining for the moment. This quiet dance with Jack is nice. It’s been a while since Vernon’s been on a date, and even longer since he’s relished in someone else’s touch, even if it isn’t real, it’s still nice to feel. 

Slowly, everyone else joins them on the ‘dance floor’, couples dancing in the middle in the twilight of the day on the side of a mountain. Maybe Vernon doesn’t mind being on the inside of the club for once, being on the dance floor instead of at a table drinking away the fact that he’s still single and alone. 

Realistically, he is still single but he’s not going to think too hard on the logistics of it all. He’s going to enjoy the rest of his wedding and enjoy his time with Jack and his other friends. That was the point of all of this. He wanted his family intact. Jack and the Grumps, they were family and Vernon loved them with all that he had. 

\--

Vernon goes home that night alone, Tim dropping him off at his apartment. It isn’t like he expected Jack to come home with him, but he’s still a little lonely when Tim drops him off outside the apartment building and Vernon goes upstairs alone. Michael greets him at the door, slinking around his legs and meowing bright and happy. 

“Hey, sweet girl,” Vernon says, scooping Michael up into his arms, holding her like a baby with her belly exposed to him. He’s tired and his feet hurt, and he feels emotionally drained, “You missed a heck of a party.” 

Vernon carries Michael to his bedroom, setting her down on the bed so he can change out of his wedding clothes. Michael sits on the mattress and watches as Vernon unbuttons his vest, sliding it off his shoulders. He does the same with his shirt and pants, tossing his clothes into the nearby hamper before tugging on a pair of pajama pants and crawling into bed. 

Vernon scrolls through Twitter, reading the nice things people are saying about Dream Daddy. It’s become a comfort to him lately, to see what people are saying, what they are excited for, if their predictions are anywhere close to being right to what they have set-up for the actual game. As Vernon holds his phone his ring rubs against the case. It’s such a small thing but it feels heavy on his hand, noticeable around his finger. He watches the ring as it catches the light from his phone, glinting, and it feels strange to imagine that it belongs to him, that it matches Jack’s, that even though Jack isn’t here with him, he’s still wearing the same ring that Vernon is right now. 

Just as Vernon is about to doze off his phone chimes, startling him awake. He’s gotten an email, which isn’t unusual, but it’s from the photographer who took the pictures at the wedding. Vernon thumbs the email open and scans the message. He had gotten home and complied the photos and sent them along to both Vernon and Jack. 

Vernon feels a surge of nerves but he clicks open the first photo. It’s him standing at the arch, hands laced in front of him as he waits for the whole thing to begin. He looks nervous, a little lost, but he’s been to enough weddings to know he’s not the only one who’s ever looked like that while standing at the altar. He goes through the other pictures; shots of Jack and Arin walking down the aisle, Audrey laughing as she throws the flower petals over her head, and then one that makes Vernon stop, his thumb pausing over the screen. 

One of the pictures is right before they kissed. It’s Jack’s hands holding Vernon’s. Everything around them drenched in gold and green, and purple. The scenery is gorgeous but then Vernon notices Jack’s face, the soft and happy look he finds there, the smile he sees on his own face. Vernon had felt panicked up there in front of everyone, but you would never know by looking at this photo. Vernon shifts in his bed. He tabs out of the email and opens up his texts, pulling up Jack’s name. 

_‘I’m going to tweet one of the wedding photos.’_ Vernon writes, _‘Is that okay?’_

Near-instantly the three dots show up on the screen indicating Jack’s response. 

_‘Of course. They’re nice, aren’t they?’_

_‘They came out beautifully.’_

Now that he has Jack’s permission Vernon goes back to the wedding photos and selects the last one he had been looking at. It feels scary to share something that feels intimate and tender, some private moment between he and Jack, but Vernon thinks it’ll help in the end, make them look more legit. He posts the photo with the caption: _‘So @jackwa1sh and I did something today.’_ And waits, his heart speeding in his chest. 

The reaction is instant. His phone chiming with tweets and texts and _‘Are you kidding?’_ messages, lots of incoherent keysmashing, the tweets pouring in faster than he can read them. 

Jack tweets too, a reply to Vernon: _‘Love you, hubby. XoXo’_ and Vernon snorts, a huge smile on his face. He favorites the tweet and then locks his phone hooking it up to charge next to his bed. Michael is still there lying with him and it’s easy for Vernon to persuade her to come and lie in the space between his arm and chest, curling up with her to fall into an easy and quiet sleep. 

\--

Vernon doesn’t see Jack again until Monday at the office. Not much has changed between the wedding and today, except that the entirety of the internet now knows that he and Jack are married. That includes Vernon’s parents who weren’t nearly as pissed off as Vernon imagined they would be, and more upset that they had missed the wedding. Vernon had gotten some nice ‘welcome to the family’ type tweets from Jack’s siblings, and overall, everyone was being pretty cool. There were always haters, always people with anger in them, people who said they were going to unfollow because they had no idea Vernon was like _that_. Vernon tries to ignore it, not to let it dampen the overall positivity that he and Jack have received, even if it’s for a fake relationship. 

As soon as Jack gets in the office Arin whisks him away to talk about filling out the appropriate forms for the green card process. The wedding was only the first step, they still had more hoops to jump through. Vernon works distractedly on the Dream Daddy game while he waits for Jack to return.

“Hey, so how’s married life?” a voice says and Vernon looks up to see Ross standing in front of him. 

“A lot like regular life, actually,” Vernon says. 

Ross plops down in a chair across from Vernon, a smirk on his face. 

“How was the honeymoon? Did you at least get a platonic, no-strings-attached handjob from Jack?” 

Vernon is sure his eyes go wide as he blinks at Ross before he lets out a laugh, “Um, no, I actually haven’t seen Jack since the wedding.” Vernon pointedly ignores the images that pop up in his head from Ross’s words. 

“You haven’t?” Ross asks, sounding confused, “Did he not come home or something?” 

Vernon sets his pen down and focuses on Ross, his eyebrows furrowed, “He went back to his apartment and I went back to mine.” 

“What?!” Ross says, jumping to his feet, “What? You’re not living together?!” 

“No?” Vernon says, surprised to see Ross so worked up, “What’s going on, Ross.” 

Ross groans and runs a hand through his hair, “What’s going on is that you and Jack are idiots and are going to get caught by Immigration. You _have_ to live together. They’re going to take one look at you and him in your separate apartments and they’re going to _know_.”

Vernon swallows, his blood going cold. He doesn’t want this to be all for naught, and he trusts Ross’s opinion on the matter since he’s the only one of them whose been through it before. 

“We just hadn’t talked about it yet, I guess?” 

“Listen, I care about you and him, and I don’t want to see either of you get in trouble or Jack get deported, so I’m going to be honest with you. You need to sort shit out. I know it feels fast, but you have to treat this like a standard relationship thrown into hyper-drive. You’re married to him and you have to live with him.” 

“Okay,” Vernon says, nodding, licking at his dry lips. The ring around his finger feels heavier than ever, “Okay, I’ll talk to him as soon as he gets done with Arin.” 

Ross nods, “Alright good, Jesus, I feel like I have to be your life-coach or some shit to make sure you two are pulling this off.” 

“Thanks Ross,” Vernon says, though he feels unsteady, like maybe things weren’t going as well as he thought, or that it was all going to be harder than he imagined. Ross was right, it was like going from zero to one hundred in terms of a relationship; yesterday Vernon was a single bachelor with a cat and his apartment and now he’s got a husband and he’s gearing up to co-habitation. 

Ross stands there a moment, looking like maybe he was too harsh on Vernon, like he regrets being a hard-ass; it’s a look Vernon is fairly familiar with. He’s used to Ross and the Grumps and the different quirks that come with being around them all the time. Ross leans over and squeezes at Vernon’s shoulder. 

“I know you’re doing what you can. I know it’s a lot, and I’m here for you okay? We all are. Whenever you need us, we’re here.” 

Vernon nods, feeling that swell of affection for this office and the people in it, how this is still easily the best job he’s ever had and working here being the best decision he’s ever made. 

“I know, thank you. I really do appreciate it.” 

Ross smiles, but it’s tight and worried, and does nothing to ease the bundle of nerves in Vernon’s stomach. Ross goes back to work and Vernon looks at his laptop, trying to ease himself back into being productive, but he just stares blankly at the screen, too busy wondering what he and Jack can do. 

Both of their apartments are small and there’s no way in hell they’d be able to afford a house together, especially if they’d only be living together temporarily until Jack’s paperwork went through and he was all squared away. It made the most sense for them to keep one of their apartments and one person move in with the other. Vernon doesn’t want to be difficult but he’s attached to his place, it’s small and expensive, but it’s in Little Korea, and it’s the life he carved out on his own. He’s sure Jack feels the same way about his own place so he’s not really sure what to do, not sure which one of them will end up giving in.

Finally, Vernon does get back to work and twenty minutes later he sees Jack padding out into the main part of the office. 

“Hey, yo, Jackie Boy! Can you come here, a minute?” 

“Sure, Vern, what’s up?” Jack says, coming over to where Vernon’s sitting on one of the long couches and dropping down next to him. 

Vernon saves his open document and then turns to face Jack. He looks soft and comfortable today in a gray hoodie and his hair pulled up in a small but messy ponytail. 

“Well, Ross told me that it’s really important that you and I live together, you know, to prove that we’re _actually_ a couple.” 

Jack nods, “Right,” he says, careful and easy. 

“So, I guess, I’m wondering what you think we should do?” 

Jack hums and scrubs at his chin, Vernon not missing the heavy gold band around his finger. He glances down at the twin to it on his own hand. 

“I dunno, honestly. I guess, moving isn’t that big a deal to me. I’m always going back and forth between my place here and back home, anyway.” 

“What? Like you think we should get a new place together?” Vernon asks, heart in his throat. Apartment hunting is the last thing he wants to deal with right now what with the impending immigration issues and all the work he has going on for the game and then the next set of live-shows that are coming up in a few months. He has so much on his plate. 

Jack shakes his head, “We don’t have to.” 

Vernon watches Jack, trying to suss out what he should say or do. Jack seems open to moving and he’s saying they don’t have to get a new place. Would he be okay with just moving in with Vernon? Is it presumptuous of Vernon to ask? 

“I, uh, never really proposed, did I?” Vernon asks. 

“What?” Jack says, a goofy smile on his handsome face. 

“Just, I didn’t really propose so…” Vernon drops down on one knee in front of the couch, reaching out to take Jack’s hand in his own. Jack laughing, his smile so wide and contagious that it makes Vernon smile too, “Jack, will you move in with me?” 

“Oh, I thought you’d never ask!” Jack says, using his grip on Vernon’s hand to tug him close so he can hug Vernon, pressing an over-exaggerated kiss to the brim of Vernon’s snapback. Vernon’s face is red as it is pressed against the soft cotton of Jack’s hoodie and he can hear the frantic beating of Jack’s heart through his chest. 

“Oh God, the newlywed PDA is beginning already,” Barry says from somewhere behind them. Vernon pulls back from Jack too fast, almost losing his balancing and toppling backwards into the coffee table behind him, the only thing stopping him is Jack’s hand on his shoulder. 

Vernon glances at Jack and sees his smile fade, something about it making a twinge form inside of Vernon, but then Jack’s looking up at Barry and a new smile is back in place. It was just like Jack to always be cheery, to always see the bright side of things. 

“Vernon asked me to move in with him,” Jack explains. 

“Congratulations,” Barry says, an amused look on his face, “You two are doing everything backwards.” 

“Our relationship is unconventional for sure,” Jack says, “Right, Vern?” 

“Oh yeah,” Vernon says, pushing back up on to his feet as he joins Jack on the couch, “Unconventional being the keyword.” 

“I’m going to go tell Arin about the move,” Jack says, nodding back towards their boss’s office, “I’ll talk to you later?” 

“Yeah, see you in a bit,” Vernon says, patting Jack on his thigh. 

It made sense for Jack to tell Arin about the move. Arin was the one who helped pay Jack’s rent on his apartment when Jack wasn’t in America, so that Jack wouldn’t be homeless whenever he returned from his trips home. Vernon feels relief flood through him. That was easier than he thought it would be, and he counts himself lucky that Jack is so agreeable and goes so readily with the flow on most things. 

Now, all they had to focus on was getting Jack’s stuff moved into Vernon’s already tiny apartment. That would prove to be the other challenge. The apartment barely had space for what Vernon owned, let alone trying to squeeze in a whole other person, but they’d make it work, he was sure of it.

 

\--

Two days later and Vernon is at Jack’s apartment, helping him box stuff up. They had rented a big moving truck and were trying to get as much moved in one day as possible. It wasn’t too bad considering Jack’s apartment wasn’t much bigger than Vernon’s. Right now, Vernon’s sitting on the wooden floor of the living room, pulling books off the shelf and tucking them into the box in front of him. 

“I guess, you never really realize how much shite ya own until ya move, aye?” Jack says, laughing as he works at pulling his clothes out of his dresser, folding the various t-shirts and sweaters, and jeans, and tucking them into a garbage bag, “Some of this stuff I don’t think I’ve worn since I’ve come here.” 

“Not a whole lot of use for a sweater in California,” Vernon says. 

“Yeah, it’s always a little weird. It feels like living a double life sometimes. It’s ike a constant summer here, but back home, it isn’t quite like that. I might leave a sauna and go home to an icebox.” 

“I can’t imagine,” Vernon says, “Maybe I’ve just been in California too long. I can’t deal with the cold too often. The Grump live tours were enough for me.” 

Jack smirks, “Someday I ought to bring you home to Lisburn. You’d like it, I think.” 

Vernon smiles, “You think so?” 

“Oh, yeah, it’s beautiful. It’s cold though, I have sweaters you can borrow, you know, since you don’t own any.” 

“Hey! I have a couple of coats… they’re just in the bottom of my closet or something.”

Jack laughs, “Mate, you’d die back home when there’s ice and shite.” 

Vernon packs away the last of the books and closes the box, slapping a line of tape on it before picking up the nearby sharpie and writing _‘books’_ on the front. 

“You ready to go and take this stuff down to the truck?” Vernon asks, nodding towards the box next to him and the bag that Jack’s finishing up. 

“Yeah,” Jack says with a nod, surveying the messy state of his living room. They still had some ways to go, but they were trying to pack as much non-breakable shit into the back of the moving truck, the more delicate stuff – like all of Jack’s recording equipment – was going to be transported via their cars, tucked carefully into the backseats. 

Vernon hefts up the box into his arms and Jack grabs up his two bags of clothes as he heads towards the front door, Jack leading the way out and Vernon using his free hand to pull the door closed behind them. Jack lives on the fourth floor of an apartment building, his unit opening towards a view of the pool down below, of the other buildings in the complex. The apartments always gave Vernon a futuristic vibe, like they could be the background scenery for a sci-fi flick. 

“Maybe I should have moved in here. You have a pool,” Vernon says. 

Jack laughs, “It’s only nice in theory. They don’t clean it enough and there’s always a mob of kids in it.” 

“That’s a hard pass then,” Vernon says, leading the way down the cement staircase that winds in thick slabs down to the parking lot, the truck pulled close to the stairs and Jack and Vernon’s cars parked further down the lot. 

Before they had begun to move things out of Jack’s apartment he and Vernon had sat down and made a list of what Vernon had, what they might need, Jack making check boxes on things he could afford to leave behind or get rid of. 

“Not that I’m not, uh, grateful for the easiness of it all, but why is it so easy for you to move in with me?” Vernon asks as he sets the box down by his feet on the black top of the parking lot. 

Jack shrugs, “I told you, I already felt like I was fluttering from place to place. It’s hard to feel anchored to one location, I guess you learn to not attach to too much because you’ll have to say goodbye one way or another. Besides, you’re doing this huge thing for me so what does it matter if I throw some things out to fit into your place?” 

“Hey,” Vernon says, frowning as he unloops the thick strap holding the truck door in place, “You know that just because I’m helping you out it doesn’t mean you don’t have a say in anything, right? You know you don’t have to just do what you think I want, don’t you?” 

Vernon feels like shit. Had he made that impression? Was he making Jack feel like he couldn’t say no? That Vernon had all the power in the relationship because it was Vernon doing him a favor? 

Jack looks at his sneakers and then up to Vernon, “You’re not making me feel like I can’t say no. I just want to make things easy. I’m tired of making things hard for everyone. Arin, and you, and everyone else does so much to try to help me and keep me here. The least I can do is make it easier on you all.” 

For the first time since he’s known Jack, Vernon is beginning to see a crack in the cheery personality he always associates with Jack. Realistically he knows that no one person can be happy all of the time, but it was rare for him to catch Jack in a bad mood. Was Jack that good at putting up a façade? Did he feel he couldn’t be honest when he felt bad because any complaint or negativity was like him taking his position for granted? Vernon understood that a little. Whenever he complained about work he’d have a group of people online snap that they wish they could have his job, that they’d trade in a second if they could. 

Vernon knows he and Jack are both lucky to live the lives that they do and to be around the people they are, but he also knows it’s okay to express his sadness. Granted it took him getting to a therapist to learn that it was okay, but he knows it now, and it pains him to think that Jack feels like he has to hide any bad thoughts in his head and force himself to appear happy all the time.

“We love you,” Vernon says and Jack looks at him. Vernon pulls Jack into a hug, “We love you and you’re not a burden, not to any of us.” 

Jack hugs him back, arms winding around Vernon and squeezing at him. The two of them quiet in the parking lot of Jack’s soon to be former apartment complex. 

“Thanks, Vernon,” Jack mumbles against the shoulder of Vernon’s t-shirt. The two of them break apart and Vernon goes back to opening the moving truck. 

“I guess what I’m saying is that you can vent to me whenever you need to, it’s fine.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Jack says, hefting up his plastic bags of clothes and tossing them into the back of the truck as Vernon slides the box across the metal floor.

He closes it back up and the two of them head upstairs to grab more of Jack’s stuff. 

It takes six trips and a handful of hours but Jack and Vernon don’t stop until they’ve cleared out Jack’s apartment and moved it all over to Vernon’s place. By the end of it Vernon’s dead tired and glad to be home, even if his tiny living room is crammed full of boxes and Jack’s worldly-possessions. 

“We can start sorting tomorrow,” Vernon says, plopping down on the couch. Jack looks unsure where he should go and Vernon pats the space next to him. Jack skirts around a couple of boxes before he drops down next to Vernon, “For now we can eat dinner.” 

“What d’ya have?” Jack asks. 

Vernon stretches, his arms and legs worn and exhausted from hauling stuff in and out of the truck and up and down stairs. 

“I’ll be honest with you, Jack. At this point I’d probably Postmate myself a cheese platter and call it a night.” 

“Why don’t we order Chinese instead?” Jack asks, “We’ll save cheese platters for a different time.” 

“You got it,” Vernon says, pulling up the number of his favorite place. 

Half an hour later they’re eating Chinese take-out on the couch, tucked together as they watch a movie on Netflix. 

“I like your place,” Jack says, scanning the living room around them. Vernon’s not much of an interior designer, but he tries his best and he’s proud of his apartment. 

“Thanks, man. It’ll feel more homey when we get your stuff unpacked.” 

Jack nods and sighs as he sets his container on the coffee table in front of him. 

“I’m just, I’m happy. I’m happy to be here with you. I’m happy this worked out so far. I was so scared, so sure I was fucked, but you saved me big time,” Jack says, his grin wide as he looks at Vernon, “All I’ve ever wanted to do is be here and live my dreams and now I can, I _am_ because of you.” 

Vernon’s heart swells and he can feel himself blushing. 

“Well, I’d do anything to keep you here,” Vernon confesses. He means in America, in the office, with the team, but he’s not sure how it all comes out. 

Jack’s cheeks are a faint pink as he smiles at Vernon, throwing an arm around Vernon’s shoulders and rubbing at his arm. 

“I think you’re my best friend,” Jack whispers, his eyes locked on the screen. 

Vernon feels his heart clench in his chest, “You’re mine too.” And he means it.   
\--

The next morning Vernon wakes up with his arms sore as hell from lugging all the boxes up and down stairs. His brain is foggy and for a moment he forgets that Jack is here now, that Jack _lives_ here now. It’s a weird transition to get used to. Vernon isn’t an overly private person, but he’s been living alone for years now and he’s used to doing things his way and not worrying what someone else might think about his bad habits. Is Jack going to give him shit for walking around in his underwear and playing _Overwatch_ for five straight hours after he comes home from work? 

There’s always that initial awkwardness to sharing your space with someone and though Vernon adores Jack he’s scared for those awkward moments, scared that he’s lost some of his independence, that things are going to feel too weird and different now. 

It’s early in the morning and he and Jack are due to be at the office for work. Vernon forces himself out of bed, sore limbs and all, and he pads to the bathroom to take a piss and brush his teeth. He and Jack had eaten dinner last night, laughed and talked, and made it through half of a movie on Netflix before Vernon felt sluggish and tired from moving, his stomach full of dinner. He’d gone to bed, leaving Jack out on the couch to finish the movie. 

Vernon pads out to the kitchen to start a cup of coffee and to feed Michael her breakfast. He moves through his apartment a little quieter than usual knowing that Jack is there. When Vernon reaches the kitchen, he can see into the living room and he spots Jack. He’s a crumpled line on the couch, turned onto his stomach, his face pressed into the back cushions. Michael is curled in a tight ball on Jack’s back. Vernon feels a twinge of guilt about Jack sleeping on the couch. They hadn’t really discussed sleeping arrangements. Vernon mentioned going to bed the night before and Jack had nodded, hadn’t asked where he should sleep and Vernon didn’t bring it up. 

Vernon turns on his coffee maker, opting to not use his hand-grinder because it’s loud as shit and he doesn’t want to scare the crap out of Jack on his first morning in the apartment. Vernon picks up the small bag of cat food he keeps in the kitchen next to the fridge, sprinkling some dry food into her plastic dish. 

“Mike, c’mon, Mikey, get your breakfast,” Vernon whispers. 

Vernon hears Michael make a soft meow and then she’s padding through the living room and coming into the kitchen, rubbing against his ankles as a greeting before she focuses on her food dish. Vernon pets her sleek back, rubs his knuckles against her head. 

“Eat your breakfast and get big and strong, pretty girl,” Vernon coos. 

“D’ya always give her encouragement when she eats?” Jack asks, his voice thick and groggy from sleep. 

Vernon looks up to see Jack lying flipped onto his other side, facing Vernon and Michael. Vernon smiles. Jack looks so soft and sleep-warm, his ponytail a mess from sleep, dark tendrils of hair hanging in his face.

“No, it’s our special morning ritual,” Vernon says, his face getting red with embarrassment, “Did I wake you up? I tried to be quiet.” 

“Nah, you’re fine.” Jack sits himself up, stretching, his hoodie riding up to show his pale stomach and the line of dark hair dusting his skin, “I smelt the coffee and Michael was clawing my back.” 

“She likes you,” Vernon says, “Sometimes strangers freak her out, but she thinks you’re her new bed.” 

“Like having a heater sleeping on me back.” 

A silence passes between them, thick in the quiet of the apartment. Vernon feels anxiety pluck at his stomach like strings on a guitar. That’s the kind of shit he can’t stand, the awkward silences, the moments where he feels like he has to fill them with noise and discussions or the loud whirring of his coffee grinder. 

Thankfully Jack is the one that breaks the silence, “Do I have time to take a shower before work?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “totally, man. Go for it.” 

Jack stands up, his clothes rumpled and he smooths his hair down, trying to tame the mess it’s become.

“Can you, uh, show me where your towels and stuff are? All my stuff is still boxed up.” 

“Oh! Yeah, here,” Vernon walks out of the kitchen and leads Jack down the hall towards the bathroom, to the tiny closet across from it. He tugs it open and shows Jack the haphazardly folded towels that are tucked onto the shelves, “I got soap and stuff in the shower. You can use the shampoo and whatever else you want.” 

“Thanks, man,” Jack says, smiling at Vernon as he pulls out one of the towels. 

Vernon closes the closet and pats Jack on the shoulder, “That’s what husbands do for each other, right? Share all their shit?” 

“I guess so,” Jack says with a laugh as he slips past Vernon and heads into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. 

Vernon goes back to the kitchen to pour himself his cup of coffee before he goes to his bedroom to get dressed. The apartment feels smaller than it ever has before, and that claustrophobic feeling is doing well to urge Vernon to help Jack to unpack all his stuff because he’d rather have it all put away than to have a ton of boxes stifling the ‘energy’ of his apartment. 

He hears the water in the shower turn on and then a few moments later he hears the low hum of Jack singing. Vernon can’t make out the song, just the soft deep lilt of Jack’s voice under the rush of the water, but it makes something bloom warm in his chest, some deep fondness that only seems to have increased since they’ve been spending more time together. 

By the time Jack is out of the shower Vernon is dressed and in the living room at his computer, checking his email and sipping his coffee. He can smell the wafting clean scent of the shampoo and he can hear Jack’s wet feet slap against the wood of Vernon’s apartment floor. 

“Aye, Vernon?” Jack calls. 

“Yeah, buddy?” 

“My, uh, clothes are out there. I forgot ‘em.” 

“Oh, well, you can come out here and grab them if you want? I’m just drinking my coffee.” 

There are footsteps and then Jack appears around the corner, the fluffy white towel of Vernon’s wrapped around his waist. He’s shirtless and his skin is glistening with water, his hair slicked back out his face. Vernon allows himself a quick glance before going back to his emails. Jack really was an attractive man and Vernon wasn’t planning on making it weird by admitting it now that they lived together. 

“Sorry, I’m not used to this yet. I feel really unorganized.” 

“Don’t feel bad. Tonight, when we get home I’ll help you put all your stuff away.” 

“That sounds real nice,” Jack says, and Vernon glances once more to see Jack bent over a plastic bag, trying to find clothes to wear. He watches Jack pull out jeans and a t-shirt, and a pair of boxer-briefs. The towel slips low around Jack’s hips as he digs for his clothes and Vernon adverts his eyes, drinks his coffee too quickly and burns his tongue. 

“Ya, alright, Vern?” Jack asks as Vernon sputters. 

“I’m fine, just, my coffee was a little hotter than I thought. You can, uh, you can change in my bedroom if you want?” 

“Alright, yeah, thanks, mate.” 

Jack pads away and Vernon feels weird, jittery from the coffee and no-breakfast, eager to get to the office and back into his familiar flow of work that will keep him busy and keep his mind off things that don’t belong there. 

\--

Vernon and Jack ride to work together, the both of them tucked into Vernon’s car. They stop off for Vernon’s usual breakfast of burrito and coffee and Jack grabs himself a bagel for the road. They eat in the car on the way to the office, the light morning traffic providing Vernon enough time to sneak bites of his burrito. 

At work things fall into the usual routine. Jack goes about his business and Vernon works on the game. It’s coming out so soon and Vernon is anxious and excited. He’s invested so much into the game and everyone at the office is supporting him and the team so hard, he just wants the general-public to enjoy it, he wants to have made a good game. 

Nothing really changes at work now that he and Jack are married and are living together. It isn’t like he thought things would suddenly be different, but he imagined more questions. Maybe it’s just the fear of him getting sick of spending so much time with Jack considering they see each other at work, and home, and most places in-between, but at work Vernon really only sees Jack during lunch and when it’s time to go home. They aren’t avoiding each other, just both focusing on their jobs and the lives they live outside of each other. Vernon is grateful for it, grateful there is no obligation to spend every waking moment with Jack. 

\--

That night as promised he and Jack go back to the apartment with a pizza in tow, settling down on the living room floor to begin to sort through the boxes of Jack’s things. Jack starts by pulling all of his clothes out of his bags, stacking them into categories of pants, shirts, socks, etc, and then hauling them into Vernon’s bedroom and tucking them into the already crowded drawers of Vernon’s dresser. 

“You ever have a lass live with you?” Jack asks, as he stuffs his underwear in alongside Vernon’s. 

“Not really,” Vernon says, “I’ve had relationships get close and some girlfriends who left their stuff over here for when they spent the night, but never a girl that moved in with me. What about you?” 

“Nah,” Jack says, “Back home I still live with me parents and here I’ve never had something last long enough to get that far.” 

“So, this is kinda new for the both of us?” Vernon says.

“Kinda like camp or somethin’,” Jack says, “We’re bunk mates.” 

“That’s one way to put it,” Vernon says. 

It takes a few hours but by the end of the night he and Jack have most of the boxes cleared out and Jack’s possessions are assimilated into Vernon’s apartment. He now has a fluffy rug in front of the bath tub, an extra tooth brush sat next to his own, clothes stuffed into the drawers and closet, pans and plates tucked away in the kitchen. The hard part is trying to figure out a space for Jack’s recording equipment. They can make it work if they re-arrange a little, but it would still be a tight squeeze for Jack’s piano and his computer equipment. 

Vernon and Jack sit on the couch together, the pizza box on the coffee table in front of them and a movie playing on Netflix. They sit together in quiet and Vernon doesn’t mind it for once. It’s comfortable, welcomed, it’s nice to not be alone when he comes home, to only have Michael or strangers playing _Overwatch_ to talk to. 

Vernon’s checking Twitter on his phone when he sees Jack’s head nod backwards, his eyes fluttering closed. 

“Jack,” Vernon says softly and Jack startles awake, blinking as he looks to Vernon. 

“Wha?” 

“You’re falling asleep. I guess I’m kinda on your bed, huh?” 

“Oh, yeah, but it’s okay,” Jack says, rubbing at his eyes. Vernon ignores the small part of his brain that wants to comment on how cute Jack looks when he does that. 

“Nah, I’ll let you sleep. I can hang out in my room.” 

Vernon pushes up from the couch and he grabs the thick blanket off the top of a nearby box before handing it off to Jack. 

“Sleep well, bud. I’ll see you in the morning.” 

“G’night,” Jack says around a yawn. He settles down on the couch and pulls the blanket over himself. Vernon flicks off the living room light on his way to his bedroom, leaving Jack in the semi-darkness of the room with the TV still playing the movie they had been watching. 

Vernon kicks off his jeans once he gets to his room. Usually Michael will come and sleep with him, but she’s nowhere to be found. She’s probably with Jack again. He crawls into bed and unlocks his phone, deciding to fuck around on Twitter before he goes to sleep for the night. 

For some weird reason Vernon feels lonely, even though he’s not alone. Jack is only a few feet away and Michael is somewhere in the apartment. Vernon’s bed just feels cold compared to the warm comfort of sitting on the couch with Jack. 

He ignores the feeling and focuses on reading through his Twitter feed and before long he’s nodding off himself, plugging his phone into the charger, setting his glasses on his night stand and drifting off into an easy sleep. 

\--

Vernon and Jack fall into a routine of Vernon getting up first and waking Jack up as he feeds Michael and starts a pot of coffee. As the days pass he begins to feel guilty seeing Jack crammed on to the small space of the couch. He knows it can’t be comfortable and he doesn’t want to condemn Jack to months of sleeping on the sofa. 

“Hey, Jack?” Vernon says as he stirs creamer into his coffee. 

“Yeah, Vern?” Jack asks, sitting on the couch and pulling on his socks. 

“I know the couch kinda sucks to sleep on and Michael keeps using you as her personal bed, so, I thought you could sleep in my bed for a while and I’ll take the couch. Maybe we can trade off or something.” 

Jack pauses, his sock in hand, his hair falling into his eyes. He pushes his hair out of his face and arches an eyebrow at Vernon. 

“You want me to take your bed?” 

Vernon nods, “I mean, I feel bad that you’re stuck on the couch. My couch isn’t that great.” 

“I appreciate the thought, but I can’t do it. This is your place and your bed. I can’t take your bed from you, mate.” 

Jack goes back to putting his socks on and Vernon feels something thick in his stomach. He sets his coffee down and moves over to the couch, dropping down on it next to Jack. The other man freezes for a moment, glancing at Vernon as if to try and pin-point what his plan is. Vernon doesn’t really have one. He just knows he has a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach and he wants to fix this, to make it better. 

“I guess, I’ve been kind of shit about really opening this place up for you. I didn’t mean to, but I keep referring to it as my apartment, _my_ bed, _my_ room…when…it isn’t. It’s yours too. It’s _ours_. You live here now, Jack. This place is just as much yours as it is mine. The bed is yours too.” 

Jack watches Vernon for a moment, a quiet stretching out between them. Vernon feels nervous, like maybe he gave too much away, or he offered too much, maybe Jack was perfectly happy on the couch and not in a bed next to Vernon. 

Vernon watches Jack’s mouth twitch up into a sly smile, his eyes twinkling with something that Vernon can’t really place. 

“You askin’ me to sleep with you?” 

Vernon lets out a sharp laugh, far too loud, almost like a bark and he has to fight to stop his face from going bright red. 

“I don’t have an issue platonically sharing a bed, especially with my husband, you know?” 

Jack smiles as he toes on his sneakers, “Yeah, thanks Vernon. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but it’d be nice to sleep in a real bed again.” 

“Then maybe Michael will join me at night again,” Vernon says, but his heart is beating fast in his chest, though he’s not sure why. He meant it when he said that he had no issue sharing his bed with Jack. What was it going to hurt? It wasn’t like Vernon was getting any action anyway. 

The day passes easily with work and everything else they need to do and before Vernon knows it, he’s back home again. When they get back to the apartment, Vernon flips through the paper menus he has rubberbanded together on his counter. 

“What sounds good to you, tonight?” Vernon asks, looking up from a Chinese menu. 

Jack is taking his shoes off at the door and he shrugs, “Actually, I was thinking about cooking a little something tonight instead if that’s okay?” 

“Oh?” Vernon asks, setting down the menu and turning as Jack walks into the kitchen, “I don’t want to dampen your spirit, but I think my fridge is pretty bare save for some bottles of beer and a box of baking soda.” 

“Not to worry, when I went to Target for groceries for the office, I picked us up some too,” Jack says, looking just a little too proud of himself. 

“You did?” Vernon asks. 

Jack nods and tugs open the fridge and for the first time in months Vernon’s got a good amount of food. It isn’t that Vernon hates shopping or can’t cook for himself, it’s just that he doesn’t have time to stop off and most nights it’s easier to come home and order delivery. 

“You’re a miracle worker,” Vernon says, grinning at Jack. 

“So, what sounds good? What do you like?” Jack asks, waving his hand at the food stocked in the fridge, like he’s showing off a prize on a game show. 

“What’s your expertise?” Vernon asks.

“I could make…fish tacos?” 

“Holy shit,” Vernon says, “Jack, marrying you was the best thing I ever did.” 

Jack snorts, “So, I guess that’s a yes on the fish tacos?” 

Vernon sits on the counter as Jack gets the fish tacos ready. He helps when Jack needs him to, but mostly Jack is fine with just having his company as he shreds up lettuce and bakes the fish in the oven. Vernon likes to think he’s a pretty self-sufficient adult, but he doesn’t know how to make fish tacos and Jack does, and Vernon is grateful for that fact. 

“Who taught you how to cook?” Vernon asks, plucking cherry tomatoes out of the plastic container next to him and popping them into his mouth. 

“Me ma,” Jack says, “My brother is older and he was always runnin’ off playing games and me sister and younger brother weren’t born yet, so me and ma spent a lot of time together in the kitchen. She’d talk to me while we cooked dinner, it was nice.” 

Vernon smiles picturing a small Jack standing on a step stool next to his mother, laughing and helping her. It makes his chest feel warm, makes him think of his own mom, and how he hasn’t talked to her since she found out he married Jack. Both of his parents said they weren’t angry, didn’t hate him, but they weren’t as involved as Vernon thought they might be, maybe they just didn’t know what to do with the information, how to process it. Vernon could give them time, he could wait until they were ready to come to him. 

“Here,” Jack says, “I want you to try this.” He turns and he has a chunk of the fish in his hand. Vernon’s got his own hands full of tomatoes and he lifts them helplessly to show Jack. Jack laughs, “Hang on.” And then he’s leaning in close, his hips bumping Vernon’s knees as he slides in between Vernon’s legs and offers him the bit of fish. 

“I’m not a seal,” Vernon says with a sharp laugh but he meets Jack’s hand and he lets Jack feed him the piece of meat, one of Jack’s fingers brushing the bottom of Vernon’s lip. 

“Good thing I’m not asking you to do tricks then, huh?” Jack says, smiling warmly at Vernon. He’s still close, still between Vernon’s spread thighs. 

The fish is soft and delicious in his mouth, but Vernon is too keenly aware of the way Jack is so close to him, the weird buzz that creeps through his skin at them being this close together, how he can see the brightness of Jack’s eyes, can smell the hint of the cologne he’s wearing, small things he never really noticed about Jack before. 

“Um,” Vernon says, breaking the spell that’s fallen over them, “It’s good, Jack.” 

Jack seems to come back to himself, to remember what they’re doing and how close he is and he blinks at Vernon before he steps away, and Vernon _swears_ he can see a faint pink dusting his cheeks. 

“Good, glad you like it,” Jack says, distractedly as he turns back to the pan. 

Vernon slides off the counter and gets two plates out, along with cups and napkins. The two of them working side-by-side to finish dinner. It feels domestic, feels strange, but not bad, just different than what Vernon is used to. He hadn’t realized how lonely he had felt before when he lived alone and he ordered out for his food all the time. He didn’t realize how nice it felt to have a consistent person sharing his time and space. 

Before long, their dinner is done. Jack looks over his shoulder, “Vern, bring the plates over here.” 

Vernon brings the plates and Jack deposits the fish tacos onto them. 

“You’re amazing,” Vernon says, his mouth watering at the food on his plate. 

Jack giggles, “It’s not much. I can write the recipe down. I’ll teach you.” He takes his plate from Vernon and follows him into the living room, “But it’s nice to be appreciated. I cooked a bit at my place, but it was just me, so, I didn’t make too much.” 

Vernon and Jack sit on the couch together, putting on a movie for the third night in a row. 

“Maybe we can actually finish one of these this time,” Vernon says. 

Jack snorts, “That’d be nice, wouldn’t it?” 

Jack and Vernon sit and eat together and Jack’s fish tacos are some of the best that Vernon’s ever had in his life. 

“I think you’ve ruined fish tacos for me,” Vernon says, “I’ll never enjoy another one from anywhere else because now I’ve tasted these.” 

“You’re being too nice,” Jack says, his smile big as he tucks his face into his shoulder out of embarrassment, “They aren’t that good.” 

“Don’t talk about this glorious fish taco like that,” Vernon says, “It’s amazing.” 

“I guess I’m a regular housewife then, aye? Making the hubby happy with food.” 

Vernon laughs, his stomach feeling hot and full, and like it has nothing to do with the food. 

Jack and Vernon eat and watch the movie together, finishing the whole thing this time instead of one of them passing out before it’s over. Once the movie is over it’s late and Vernon is tired. He can see Jack stifling a yawn. 

He remembers they are supposed to share a bed tonight, sleep together in a completely platonic way, and nerves prick at his stomach. It wasn’t going to be weird. It was just two friends sharing a bed, Vernon sparing Jack another night on the couch, and opening the apartment up to Jack fully. There was nothing weird about it. 

Maybe Jack could notice the shift in the room. Maybe he detected the nerves that suddenly wound through Vernon’s body like fine wire. He glances at Vernon, licks his lips. 

“You, uh, still okay with what we talked about earlier today? About us sleeping in your bed?” 

“Our bed,” Vernon corrects automatically, flushing at the words, “And yeah, it’s fine.” 

“You’re sure?” Jack asks, his eyes and face more serious than Vernon’s seen him in a while. 

Vernon turns so he’s facing Jack, “Yes, I’m sure. It’s okay. I’m fine with it as long as you are.” 

Jack’s smile is soft, his eyes shining, “I’m fine with it too.” 

It feels too formal to announce they’re going to bed, but Vernon’s tired and he can tell Jack is too. Vernon starts by turning off the television and standing from the couch. Jack follows suit, padding across the living room to click off the lamp in the corner as Vernon flips off the kitchen light. Together, the two of them head back to the bedroom. They follow their night time routine, Vernon and Jack taking turns brushing their teeth. 

Then, the two of them are in the bedroom and Jack is digging through his section of the dresser drawer to find his pajamas. Vernon sheds out of his t-shirt, feeling too big and full of delicious fish tacos. He isn’t trying to impress Jack, knows Jack wouldn’t look at him like _that_ , but still Vernon doesn’t want to look like a bloated disaster the first time he shares a bed with Jack. 

Jack doesn’t seem to pay attention as he bumps the dresser drawer closed with his hip and then unbuttons the button on his jeans. Vernon wills himself to look away, but he can’t. He can’t ignore the way Jack peels open the flaps on his jeans, the way he shifts them off his hips and the way that Jack’s boxer-briefs cling to every inch of him. 

Vernon forces himself to look away, to not be a fucking creep and watch one of his best friends change clothes. Vernon undoes his own shorts and shoves them down. Usually he sleeps in his underwear and shirtless, but he doesn’t want to make Jack uncomfortable so he grabs up a pair of basketball shorts and tugs them on, he remains shirtless though. 

Jack is finished changing and he’s shirtless too, wearing long pajama pants as he tosses his clothes into the hamper tucked into the corner of the room. The two of them are standing there on opposite sides of the bed and that’s when the awkwardness settles in. Vernon pushes past it, flips the comforter on his bed down. 

“Did you want to use your own blanket?” 

Vernon’s heart is beating ridiculously fast in his chest. It’s so stupid. Why does he feel so nervous? Jack’s back is to him, long and pale, and Vernon can see the faintest hint of freckles decorating the white of his pale skin. 

“This one is fine,” Jack says and he takes the initiative to sit down on the right side of the bed, Vernon going to flick off the light before coming to sit on the left.

Vernon settles down on the bed, tucks his feet under the blanket. His bedroom is well-lit from the street lamps outside, a neon glow that trickles in through the window and gives Vernon enough light to see Jack’s form. He can hear Jack shifting next to him and then the covers are being tugged up along his body. 

It’s strange to know that if he reaches out too far he’ll touch Jack, if he kicks his leg he’ll find Jack’s feet. Vernon isn’t uncomfortable, but he’s tense. He doesn’t want to rock the boat and it leaves him feeling stiff, too aware of his own movements, his own body. 

He rolls over on to his stomach, face in the pillows as he sets his phone on the nightstand next to the bed. 

“Good night, Jack,” Vernon mumbles. 

“Night, Vern,” Jack says, his voice soft and close and something about it makes Vernon shiver. 

Vernon honestly doesn’t think he’ll be able to fall asleep with Jack in his bed. He’s too nervous about making things weird, about hitting or kicking Jack on accident. How long since he’s shared a bed with someone? There were a few little flings where the girls spent the night and slept over, where Vernon fell asleep with a girl in his arms and woke up alone to an empty bed, but that was it. It had been years since he’s had someone sleeping with him consistently. 

Vernon lies there in silence and he can hear the quiet of Jack’s breathing mixing with the rumbling traffic from outside and the sounds lull him into sleep, like a city lullaby that he’s grown too accustomed to. 

\--

Vernon wakes up the next morning and the bed is empty. He blinks at the rumpled side of the bed and wonders when exactly Jack had left. Was he using the bathroom? Did he leave during the night? Did he decide it was too weird to sleep in the same bed as Vernon after all and take off when Vernon passed out? Something rolls uncomfortably in Vernon’s belly, reminding him of those mornings when he’d wake up alone, his date having left without so much as a goodbye note. 

Vernon sits himself up in the bed. Distantly he can hear noises from the kitchen and he can smell the distinct tangy scent of coffee in the air. He throws the blankets off and pads out into the kitchen, finding Jack at the stove, mixing something in a frying pan. 

“Good morning!” Jack says brightly. 

“What time did you get up?” Vernon asks around a yawn. 

“I don’t know, maybe twenty minutes ago? I woke up and had to piss and couldn’t fall back to sleep, so I figured I’d get up and start the day. I didn’t wake you when I got up, did I?” 

“No,” Vernon says. Something close to relief fills him at the thought that Jack stayed in the bed with him all night, “My alarm got me.” 

“Good, I fed Michael and put some coffee on. I was making some scrambled eggs for us if you feel up to it?” Jack says, shrugging. 

“Oh wow, thanks man. I might take a shower first though.” 

“Oh, good, the eggs should be done by the time you’re out then.” 

Vernon nods and stumbles back to the bathroom to pee and then jump in the shower. Jack was really too much in the best way possible. It felt like Vernon giving him more space, assuring him the apartment belonged to him too, was like opening a door for Jack where he felt more comfortable being himself around Vernon, where he learned Vernon’s routine and adapted to it. 

There’s still that little voice in the back of Vernon’s mind that worries that Jack’s only doing all this nice stuff for Vernon because he feels like he has to, because he feels like he owes it to Vernon, despite Vernon telling him it didn’t work like that. Jack didn’t have to make them breakfast or dinner, he didn’t have to feed Michael, he didn’t have to do anything besides maybe help clean the apartment and pay some of the bills and Vernon would be fine, wouldn’t expect anything else. 

Vernon showers and ambles back to his room to throw on his clothes for the day. By the time he gets back out to the living room Jack is sitting on the floor in front of the couch with his plate of eggs and slices of toast on the coffee table in front of him. 

Jack smiles up at Vernon, “I made you a plate just in case.” 

“Thanks Jack. You didn’t have to do any of this, you know?” 

“I know,” Jack says with a nod of his head, “I wanted to though.” 

Vernon believes him but as he scoops up his plate he vows to make it up to Jack somehow, maybe he’ll buy Jack’s lunch today at work. He comes and sits next to Jack on the floor. Michael is on the couch behind them, curled in a sleek black ball. 

“You must be pretty excited,” Jack says, “Dream Daddy comes out tomorrow, right?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says. Honestly, he kind of forgot which seems impossible because the game has been his life for a little over a year, but he had so much going on with Jack and the wedding and everything else that it was easy to let the pressures of the game slide, “It’s pretty crazy. I kind of can’t believe it.” 

“It’s amazing,” Jack says, “I’m really proud of you, Vernon.” 

Vernon smiles down at his plate, “Thanks, Jack.” 

The two of them finish eating their breakfast and head into the office. Vernon jumps right into all the last-minute details for the game’s release tomorrow. He’s so nervous but beyond excited. The game has been in his life for so long and now he was sending it out to the world. He’s trying to steel himself for whatever reactions come with the game. There has been so much love and support but Vernon knows that with every good there is just as much bad, and he tries not to subscribe to either side too much. 

The day passes by quickly and as promised when Jack goes to grab the lunches Vernon presses a twenty-dollar bill into Jack’s hand. 

“Your lunch is on me,” Vernon says. 

“You don’t have to do that,” Jack says, looking at the money in his hand, making to hand it back to Vernon, but Vernon puts his hand up to stop him. 

“Keep it. I want you to.” 

Jack still looks skeptical, but he nods and slips the twenty into the pocket of his jeans. 

Vernon doesn’t see Jack again until they are on the way home. He’s driving this time with Jack riding in the passenger side seat, the traffic once again slowing down their progress on getting back to the apartment. 

“Did you get everything done for the game?” Jack asks. 

“I think so. I don’t want to overthink it. It’s as done as it’s going to be. I feel like maybe I could tweak it forever if I was allowed to, so it’s probably better that it’s coming out now.” 

“I know that feeling. Kind of like writin’ a song. Sometimes you just have to step away from it and let it be, let people process it how they will.” 

Vernon nods. Jack’s words help to ease his mind, but he can’t deny the nerves that pluck through him, that make him both excited and dreading the release of the game. 

Jack and Vernon fall into their usual routine of eating dinner and watching Netflix. Something about the consistency is comforting and Vernon finds himself sinking into the couch against Jack, their shoulders touching as they watch TV. Jack is a warm line against Vernon’s side. He realizes how perfectly content he is this way, how hard it is to pick out the bad or anxious things in his life when he feels perfectly happy in this moment. 

Jack shifts next to him and Vernon is worried that he wants Vernon off of him or away from him. He leans up a bit, enough to give Jack space if he decides he’s not comfortable with the way their bodies are touching, but Jack just shakes his arm out before settling it around Vernon, the crook of his elbow touching at the back of Vernon’s neck, his fingers brushing Vernon’s shoulder.

‘M’arm was fallin’ asleep,” Jack says, wiggling his fingers so they stroke at Vernon’s t-shirt, “S’that okay?” 

“Yeah, it’s fine,” Vernon says, “I don’t mind.” It reminds him of Stout Train and how Jack had pulled him close, arm wrapped around him, red cheeked and giggling, breath smelling like Guinness. Vernon was used to affectionate friends but something about when Jack did it always surprised Vernon like he couldn’t find the reason for it, for why Jack would even bother to joke about something that felt so impossible. Jack’s touch is comforting and Vernon leans in against him, pushing away any ‘why’s’, any questions, and just trying to let himself enjoy the tranquility of their apartment, their couch, their night. 

\--

The next day Vernon wakes up a clear hour before the game is due to launch. He’s got texts from Leighton and Jared, and everyone else expressing their excitement and how they also feel a little like they are going to throw up. Jack’s still asleep next to him, not at the edge of the bed but still not close to Vernon. The bed sharing hasn’t been as weird as Vernon imagined, it did feel something akin to having a bunk-mate or reminds him of high school sleepovers where your best friend spent the night and slept in the bed next to you. 

Vernon pulls his laptop up onto the mattress after he goes to the bathroom, feeds Michael, and starts a pot of coffee. He and Jack are due to go into the office, but Vernon feels like he might combust before he makes it into work. 

He glances over at Jack. He’s sound asleep on his back, arm slung over his eyes, mouth parted just slightly as he sleeps close by. Vernon smiles fondly and knows he should probably wake Jack up soon, but he looks so peaceful that it’s hard to imagine doing so.

Vernon checks the Tumblr tags for _Dream Daddy_ and he sees post after post of people feeling just as excited as he is that the game is coming out in half an hour or so. He’s ready, he wants it out there, wants to know what people love about it, what jokes they caught, what they wind up appreciating the most. He’s so eager to know these things. He could spend hours caught in a loop where he reads the positive posts and counts down the time for the game to release, but he and Jack are supposed to go to work and Vernon really needs to get Jack up and get motivated to do something else with his day, something to take his mind off of the time. 

“Jack,” Vernon says as he closes his laptop, “Jack c’mon, buddy, it’s morning.” 

Jack lets out a soft groan and shifts under the blankets. 

“I got coffee on the pot. You want some toast? Some cereal?” Vernon wasn’t a great cook and though he could manage a panful of eggs he wasn’t sure he wanted to present them to Jack when Jack was so good at making the two of them food. 

Jack mumbles under the thick layer of comforter and Vernon reaches over to tug it down. 

“What?” 

“What kind of cereal?” Jack asks, blinking sleepily at Vernon. 

“Oh, I think I have some Frosted Flakes? Maybe some Peanut Butter Crunch?” 

Jack sits up, his hair a mess as he rubs at his face. Vernon thinks Jack’s cute most of the time, but he’s really cute when he’s waking up. In those moments where he’s soft and quiet and his voice is super deep. Vernon just finds himself very fond of morning Jack. 

“Peanut Butter Crunch could be good,” Jack mumbles. 

“You got it, bud,” Vernon says, setting his laptop aside and padding out into the living room to make Jack a bowl of cereal. While he’s out there he pours two mugs of coffee. Jack never drinks his right away so Vernon leaves his out on the counter while he balances Jack’s cereal and his own coffee and heads back to the bedroom. 

He passes off the bowl to Jack’s grateful hands and sets his coffee mug on the nightstand to cool. 

“You hearing good things?” Jack asks, nodding towards Vernon’s closed laptop.

“Oh, yeah, I was just checking a little bit. It’s silly.”

Jack takes a spoonful of cereal, “It’s not silly. People are excited and they should be.” 

“Are you saying that as a supportive husband?” Vernon jokes. He pads over to the dresser and paws through it before pulling out one of his well-loved band t-shirts, tugging it on over his head. 

“I’m saying it as your supportive friend who is also your husband, but really wants to finally play the game.” 

“Maybe we can play it this weekend or something?” 

“It won’t be boring for you to watch?” Jack asks around his mouthful of cereal. 

“Are you kidding? I’d love to see what decisions you make! You’ll even get all of my insider info and exclusive commentary.” 

Jack laughs, “I’m honored.” 

Vernon tugs on a pair of shorts as Jack finishes his cereal, tipping the bowl to his mouth to slurp at the milk. Vernon settles down on the bed with a pair of socks and slides them on his feet. Jack stands and carries his bowl out to the kitchen. As Vernon sips at his coffee he can hear Jack cooing at Michael out in the living room and he laughs. 

Jack makes his way back to the bedroom with his own mug of coffee in hand. He smiles at Vernon as he sets his coffee cup on the dresser, pushing his pajama pants down off his hips so they fall to the floor. Vernon tries not to watch as Jack gets out of his pajamas, how he’s slender but not necessarily ripped, with just a pooch of a soft belly around his middle, sharp hips, small but solid in a way. Vernon forces himself back to his screen, to ignore the vision of Jack changing that he can catch in his peripherals. 

Jack changes, they finish their coffees, and then they head out to the office. Vernon feels jittery all day and he can hardly blame it on the caffeine that’s surging through his body from his ‘breakfast’. 

Vernon spends his work day on all the last second things gearing up for Dream Daddy. There isn’t much he can do besides watch the clock and try not to let himself go crazy with anticipation. When the game releases Arin gathers them all around and claps Vernon on the shoulder and as a group they all celebrate the release of the game under the company’s name. An entire year of Vernon’s life is out there for the whole world to see and have and it feels strange, almost, ironically, like sending his kid out into the world and just hoping that people will be nice to it. 

The game sells fast and Vernon spends a good portion of the morning watching the figures roll in alongside Arin. Not a lot of the things they do in the office are for the money, but it’s nice to see something he’s worked hard on earn something back for them. 

The day passes in a whirl of excitement and celebration and by the time it’s time to go home Vernon feels better than he has in a long time; he’s elated. Today was a good reminder that he’s doing what he wants, creating what he wants, and that he loves his job, loves the people he’s surrounding himself with. Jack smiles at him a lot as they drive, as he sings quietly to the songs on the radio. 

“What?” Vernon asks, when he and Jack lock eyes for the third time. 

“Nothing, just it’s nice to see you happy.” 

“Is it weird that this is the happiest I’ve been in a long time?” Vernon asks. 

“No,” Jack says, “You made a _game_. That’s huge. You should be happy. You deserve to be happy.” 

Vernon nods, feeling warm from Jack’s words. He was so good at building others up. That hint of his natural positivity pouring out of him.

“Thanks, Jack.” 

The two of them arrive back to the apartment and Vernon is a little embarrassed by how fast he kicks off his shoes and boots up his laptop. Jack laughing because he knows exactly what Vernon’s doing. He had held off on looking at any reviews or in-depth comments about the game because he wanted to give people time to play it before he read their opinions on it. 

He settles on the couch with his laptop against his knees. He scrolls through the _Steam_ reviews first and they are mostly positive, there is still the occasional whiner demanding a _true_ Game Grumps game, but Vernon’s learned to ignore those. 

Jack sets to warming them up some leftover pizza for dinner which Vernon doesn’t mind. He’s pretty sure he could eat pizza just about any time. A few minutes later and Jack is carrying out two paper plates with steaming reheated pizza on them, setting them down on the coffee table in front of Vernon before joining Vernon on the couch. 

His hand finds Vernon’s back, a warm and light touch. 

“What’s the word? Good things?” Jack asks, leaning in to read the screen over Vernon’s shoulder. 

Vernon smiles back at Jack, “So far so good. A couple of negative things but that comes with the territory.” 

“They’re jealous,” Jack says, “That they didn’t think of it first.” 

Vernon laughs, “I appreciate you trying to make me feel better.” 

Jack leans forward to grab his pizza, his hand leaving Vernon, and it was a simple touch, but Vernon finds himself wanting it again, wanting the ease and comfort of contact. 

“Anytime,” Jack says as he bites into his slice of pizza. 

That night Vernon stays up far too late reading people’s thoughts on the game. He emails Leighton any reviews he finds funny or interesting and it’s close to four in the morning by the time he shuts down his laptop and slips into bed next to Jack. 

Jack is already asleep, had gone to bed maybe three hours before Vernon did so Vernon is careful to not move too much as he settles into his spot. Michael makes a tiny irritated noise as Vernon bumps her with his foot and he watches her in the dim lighting of the room as she crawls up to lie between Jack’s spread legs, curling up in a ball there. 

“Sorry,” Vernon whispers to her as he shuts his eyes. It feels almost instant that he falls asleep.

\--

Vernon wakes up far too early. He groans and presses his face into the pillow under him. He shifts, trying to get comfortable, but he finds himself unable to move freely because of a heavy weight over him. At first, he thinks it’s Michael finally coming back to him and deciding to sleep on him again, but Vernon quickly realizes that the weight is way too heavy for his cat.

Vernon freezes as he figures out that it’s Jack on him. More specifically it’s Jack’s arm around him, settled across Vernon’s back. Their bodies are lined together, legs tangled and he can feel the warmth of Jack’s breath fluttering against the bare skin of Vernon’s shoulders. Shit. This is the first time they’ve woken up like this, cuddled together in bed. 

Vernon isn’t sure what to do. Should he wake Jack up? Push him off? Go back to sleep and pretend like none of this ever happened? He didn’t think it was on purpose, fuck, Jack probably wasn’t even aware that in his sleep he had cuddled up to Vernon. It was an accident, a side-effect of them sharing a bed, it was bound to happen. Vernon tells himself that. This wasn’t on purpose, this wasn’t Jack choosing to snuggle. 

He can’t lie and say that it feels bad. It’s the opposite. It’s nice to feel Jack there against him, to feel someone holding him, Jack’s warm and solid chest pressing against Vernon’s back. The longer he lies there awake and aware of all the points where their bodies are touching, the more a ball of guilt forms in his stomach. He shouldn’t be enjoying this. This isn’t his to enjoy. This is a mistake, an accident, and it’ll only be this once, this second, once Jack wakes up and finds out what happened he’ll roll away, he’ll probably laugh embarrassed and pink faced and apologize to Vernon, but he won’t let it happen again, fuck, he might not even sleep in the bed anymore to ensure that it doesn’t. So, there was no point in Vernon getting used to the feeling of Jack spooning him. 

Vernon closes his eyes and wills himself to move, to slide out of Jack’s loose hold, but deep inside he knows he doesn’t really want to. He doesn’t want to wake Jack and he doesn’t want to break the silent picture the two of them make with the quiet way their bodies are joined together on the bed. Vernon lets himself slip back into unconsciousness, lulled to sleep by Jack’s even breathing, the rise and fall of his body against Vernon’s. 

When he wakes up again it’s to the alarm on his phone going off, signaling that it’s time to get up to get ready for work. Vernon somehow feels even more tired than he had when he went to sleep last night. He groans and shifts on the bed and realizes with a start that Jack isn’t pressed against him anymore. Vernon lifts his head and blinks against the golden light seeping into the bedroom. Jack isn’t in the bed at all. Vernon rolls on to his back and stretches out, distantly he can hear the rush of running water from the bathroom. 

He should probably shower before he goes into work too. Vernon sits up, remembering all too well the feeling of Jack cuddling him. He had been hoping it was a dream, some weird mix-up in his head, and not something he and Jack would have to talk about or acknowledge. 

Vernon gets out of bed and pads into the kitchen to start coffee. On the way back he knocks on the bathroom door, “Hey, Jack?” 

“Yeah, mate?” Jack calls over the water. 

“Can you just leave the water running? I’m going to have to shower too before work.” 

“Sure thing!” Jack says, “I’ll be done in a minute.” 

Vernon turns from the door and grabs a towel from the closet, resting it over his shoulder. He’s only standing there a few moments before the door opens in front of him and Jack is there, skin wet, his hair slicked back with water and smelling sweet and clean. He’s got a towel around his waist again Jack’s hand there to help the towel stay up. He grins at Vernon and Vernon scoots back to let Jack pass him so he can get into the bedroom to change. 

“All yours,” Jack says as he walks towards their shared bedroom, leaving damp footprints behind him, a trail, like bread-crumbs to lead Vernon back to him. 

Vernon nods at Jack, “Thanks, man.” and he steps into the steamy bathroom. The air is heavy with the scent of Jack’s shampoo and soap, clean and refreshing and just a little spicy; it’s a scent that Vernon is rapidly becoming used to. The same way that he feels like Jack is assimilating into his life, how he’s got little soaps and shampoo bottles on the shelf in the shower, his toothbrush in the holder next to Vernon’s. 

It was easy to shake the idea that everything belonged to him. It felt natural now to think of the stuff in the apartment as _their_ things instead of just his, their room, their bed, their lives together in the apartment. Vernon had been afraid he’d feel cramped, claustrophobic in his own house, but it’s the opposite. The apartment feels warm, and alive, and inviting in a weird way, a way it had never felt before when Vernon came home to just Michael. 

Vernon showers and by the time he gets out of the bathroom, Jack is dressed and sitting out in the living room, playing on his phone, with Michael square in his lap. Vernon dresses and the two of them head off for work, grabbing breakfast on the way because they didn’t have time to eat before they had to leave. 

Vernon’s grateful it’s Friday and that the weekend is right around the corner. He feels wrung out in a weird way, tired. Without the constant stress of the game he feels a little aimless, like he’s not sure what to work on or do. The game had been a constant project in his life for about a year now, and now it was out. It felt freeing and a little nerve-wracking at the same time. 

All day Vernon half-expects the topic of he and Jack snuggling to come up. He had been anticipating it on the car ride to the office, but Jack never said anything. Even now as he’s setting up to film an announcement plug for the next round of Game Grumps Live shows he doesn’t bring it up. Maybe it’s not a big deal, or maybe he had no idea? Maybe by the time Jack woke up he and Vernon were already separated and Jack has no clue that it happened at all? 

Vernon isn’t sure and he doesn’t want to be the one to bring it up so he lets it slide to the back of his mind, focuses in on all the shit they are going to need to do to gear up for the impending live shows. 

The day passes quickly and in what feels like no time at all Vernon and Jack are home. Vernon is slumped on the couch, worn from the lack of sleep, maybe still just recovering from how insanely busy the last few weeks have been.

“I think I’m probably going to sleep for, like, twelve hours tomorrow,” Vernon says, “Just so you know.” 

Jack laughs as he looks up from his phone, “Yeah? Well, you deserve to get some rest. You know you don’t need my permission to sleep in though, right?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says with a shrug, “I wanted to give you a heads-up, I guess? In case you had something planned.” 

Jack stretches and grins at Vernon, “Nope, no plans. I’m all yours.” he bats his eyes at Vernon, and Vernon laughs, feeling a warmth fluttering in his stomach, “But, I guess I could be a good husband and, you know, make you breakfast in bed or something.” 

“If I wasn’t sure before that you were trying to win some kind of ‘#1 husband award’ I’m positive about it now.” 

“Damn, I was hoping I was being subtler than that. I didn’t want extra competition.” 

“Too bad,” Vernon says, “I’m gonna have to try harder. I want that mug and t-shirt combo.” 

“You won’t hear me complaining about a breakfast in bed,” Jack says, a smug little smile slipping across his face. They both know Vernon isn’t much of a cook and that it’d wind up being some kind of breakfast Vernon got from a cafe around the apartment or cereal rather than anything he actually cooked. 

Vernon stays up just long enough that night to eat dinner with Jack and watch half of Les Misérables with him before he can barely keep his eyes open. He wants to stay up longer, to spend time with Jack, but his eyes burn from the lack of sleep, and he just can’t hang anymore. Jack doesn’t seem to mind as Vernon slips off to their shared room and crawls into bed. He’s comfortable and relaxed and content by the fact that he doesn’t have to set an alarm for the next day, that he has no obligations, no one depending on him for anything and he can enjoy himself. 

It's also comforting to hear Jack moving around out in the living room, to hear the dull tinny of the movie still playing. It reminds Vernon of being a kid and being put to bed by his parents, that weird feeling of knowing someone was looking out for you. 

\--

The next time Vernon wakes up it’s well into Saturday afternoon. He’s warm and comfortable and it takes a few moments for his body to register that he’s awake. As he blinks himself back to consciousness, several things become clear all at once. 

Vernon’s suddenly aware of a warm body pressing against his own, he’s aware of the way his head rises and falls with slow and steady breathing, of skin warm under his cheek. He glances up just barely to see Jack lying there on his back in the bed, calmly sleeping, Vernon turned in against him, curled into Jack’s side, his head pillowed on Jack’s bare chest. 

Jack’s arm is wound around Vernon’s shoulder, holding loose and what feels like protective, their legs tangled together on the bed. Vernon feels his cheeks go hot with embarrassment. How had they wound up like this again? He searches his brain for any memory of waking up in the middle of the night and pressing in against Jack. He doesn’t even remember waking up when Jack came to bed, too dead to the world and tired to notice. 

Jack’s holding him, their bodies fitting together naturally, and at least Vernon feels like he probably didn’t force himself onto Jack if they are locked together this way. Still, it’s a little embarrassing and awkward, even if it feels nice to be close to someone again. 

While Vernon’s still debating what to do about this, he hears a soft intake of breath and then a quiet groan from Jack. He feels Jack’s hand rub at Vernon’s bare shoulder and the simple touch makes electricity spark across his skin. 

“Hey,” he hears Jack say, his voice thick and slurring with sleep. 

Now Vernon feels even more embarrassed, anxious to have Jack awake too. What if he realizes how they are positioned? What they are doing? What if he jerks away like Vernon is made of fire and Jack’s bound to wind up burned? 

Instead Jack just rubs his free hand over his eye, “Did I wake you up?” he asks. 

“Oh, um, no,” Vernon says, “You didn’t.” 

“Mmkay, good, I was worried. I wanted you to get as much sleep as you wanted.” 

Jack isn’t mentioning the fact that they’re cuddling on the bed, he isn’t acting like it’s weird, and that’s even more confusing to Vernon. Why was Jack so perpetually calm about everything? 

“Isn’t this...um...don’t you think it’s weird we’re cuddling?” Vernon says, less tactfully than he had anticipated, but he wanted to put it out there. 

“Not really?” Jack says. He sits up, his arm leaving Vernon’s body as he looks down at him, “Why? Are you uncomfortable? I’m sorry if I made you uncomfort-” 

“No!” Vernon says, and then he’s sitting up too, scrambling to explain himself, “I’m not uncomfortable. I guess, I just thought you would be?” 

“You’re my friend,” Jack says with a shrug, “You’re also like a heater, way better than Michael.” 

“Do you cuddle with all your friends?” Vernon asks, feeling weird and vulnerable sat in his boxers on the bed next to Jack. He’s honestly not sure what answer he’s hoping for. 

“No,” Jack says, “Just you apparently.” 

Vernon feels warm, an odd sensation that almost feels happy to know that this isn’t common for Jack, that this is just something between the two of them. 

“All I’m saying,” Jack continues, drawing Vernon’s attention to him. He rubs at the back of his neck, “If it happens. I don’t mind. We’re in the same bed, we’re pretending to be a couple. I don’t think a little cuddling is gonna kill us. We’ve kissed, you know?” 

Vernon tries not to think of the kiss, how soft Jack’s mouth felt, how utterly natural it felt, how it wasn’t at all what Vernon was expecting, and how his only real qualm was that it was happening in front of so many people. 

“Yeah,” he says, feeling his face grow hot, “I guess we did, huh?” 

Jack lies back on the bed, stretching out in a long line, “Don’t tell me you forgot our wedding kiss?” he waggles his eyebrows at Vernon, making Vernon laugh. 

“No, don’t worry. It’s embedded in my memory forever. Even when this is all over I’ll remember our kiss.” He means it as a joke, to be funny, but neither of them laugh. Vernon feels a weird static creeping along his chest and Jack is quiet, arms tucked behind his head as he stares at the ceiling. 

A silence stretches long between them, thick and awkward, and Vernon wills it to break, but he can’t bring himself to speak. Finally, it’s Jack who sits back up, glancing at Vernon. 

“I think I’m going to make some lunch. Do you want some?” 

“Um, yeah, sure, man. Thanks,” Vernon says. 

Jack nods and then he’s up and out of the bed, grabbing for a pair of jeans off the floor and tugging them back on. Vernon reaches over to the nightstand and grabs his glasses, sliding them on his face. He lies down in the bed, but it feels colder now. 

A short time later Jack pops back into the bedroom where Vernon has managed to put on pajama pants and a t-shirt, but he’s still in bed with his phone in hand. He wasn’t trying to avoid Jack or leave him to hang out alone in the kitchen, but he was struggling to find the motivation to get out of bed. 

“Lunch is done if you want some?” 

“Yeah, it smells good. Did you make bacon?” Vernon asks as he sits himself up. 

“Yeah, it’s quick and simple,” Jack says, smiling. That awkward tension still hangs in the air between them, but Vernon tries not to focus on it, he tries to let it pass. He stands up and follows Jack out into the living room. 

Jack has the bacon nestled on some paper towels on the kitchen counter and all the components for a sandwich laid out beside it. Vernon and Jack are in the kitchen, side-by-side, piling bacon onto toast and making their food together. 

“Looks like you’re going to win that award after all,” Vernon says, referencing their conversation from the night before. 

Jack smiles, but it isn’t all the way, not like Vernon is used to. 

“Yeah, you’re making it easy on me.” 

Vernon’s pretty sure that Jack didn’t mean it as an insult, but it still stings, like maybe Jack feels like their set-up isn’t fair or even, that Jack is doing too much for the both of them and Vernon needs to step-up on his end. He smiles uneasily at Jack, unsure of what to say, just wishing that the terrible and thick awkward feeling would pass. 

They eat together on the floor seated at the coffee table, a habit that Vernon’s picked up from Jack. When something’s messy he notices that Jack always wants to sit at the table instead of the couch. It makes Vernon feel young again, reminding him of summer, when he and his brothers would come inside from swimming or playing in their backyard sprinkler and their mom would sit them on towels on the living room floor, eating chips with soggy wrinkled fingertips while they watched cartoons. 

“Hey,” Jack says, after a few minutes of quiet, looking away from the TV where an episode of _Bob’s Burgers_ is playing, “I was thinking of trying out _Dream Daddy_ today?” 

“What?” Vernon says, setting his sandwich down on his plate, “Really?” 

“Of course! You’ve been working on it for ages. Like I wouldn’t want to play it?” 

Vernon giggles, feeling that giddy embarrassment filling him. He’s proud of the game and of what they made together as a team, and he’d like to see Jack’s reaction to the story and who he’d end up woo-ing. 

“Alright, cool, yeah, I’d like that.” 

They finish their meals and Jack grabs his laptop as Vernon carries their plates into the kitchen. He decides to wash the small load of dishes leftover in the sink, it’s the least he can do since Jack had been cooking for them, it seemed unfair to make him clean-up afterwards too. 

By the time he’s got the dishes washed, dried, and put away in the cupboards Jack’s already playing the game. He’s made his ‘dadsona’ which looks as close to Jack as he could get with the hair and outfit choices and he’s encountering Damien at the mall in the game. 

“Geez, you’re far already,” Vernon says, dropping onto the couch next to Jack, his body angled sideways to see Jack’s screen. 

“What can I say? I’m committed to dating one of these dads,” Jack says with a laugh. 

“Alright, but I gotta know. Did you sleep with Robert?” Vernon asks, tipping his face up to look at Jack. 

“While Robert was _very_ charming I thought it was a little too early for that,” Jack says. 

Vernon grins and sits himself up, “Alright, well tell me who you like then? Who are you trying to date?” 

“So far,” Jack says, humming a little as he clicks through to the next scene, “So far I like Mat.” 

Vernon feels his heart jolt in his chest. “Oh? Why Mat?” 

“I dunno,” Jack says, “He’s nice and he likes music...he kind of reminds me of you, a little?” Jack looks at Vernon, his expression neutral as they lock eyes, giving Vernon no hint of what might be going on in his head, if anything at all. 

Vernon laughs, “He’s not a very well disguised self-insert.” 

“I’ll be expecting my banana bread any day now,” Jack says with a wink. 

Vernon and Jack stay up ridiculously late playing Dream Daddy, Jack refusing any help from Vernon as he tries to claim Mat’s heart. Vernon’s having fun watching Jack enjoy the game, watching him laugh at the dumb jokes that Vernon wrote, to see him engage with the story, the characters, it’s just the kind of thing Vernon needed to see, the kind of thing that doesn’t make him regret one second of the insane process of creating the game. 

\--

The next day, just like the ones before it, Vernon wakes up snuggled up to Jack. He’s getting used to the feeling, especially since Jack told him it wasn’t a big deal. This time the two of them are turned on their sides, Jack’s chest against Vernon’s back, like the first time they had woken up cuddled together. Jack’s arm is draped over Vernon’s side, his fingers warm on Vernon’s skin. 

Vernon sighs into his pillow and tries to fall back to sleep, not ready to be awake quite yet, except then he’s feeling something, something he’s _sure_ he’s never felt before. He can feel Jack’s dick semi-hard against the back of his thigh. Vernon freezes up. He knows he isn’t imagining the feeling. He also knows morning wood is definitely a thing. It’s still a shock to feel Jack’s hardness there, the feeling too intimate. 

Vernon sucks in a breath. He ignores the way his face is burning with embarrassment. Why was he being stupid right now? He and Jack had just talked about how shit happens when you share a bed, share space, and this was just another one of those things. 

Vernon shifts, testing how easy it would be to slip out of Jack’s loose hold, or maybe he just wants to see if what he’s _really_ feeling is what he thinks it is. His thigh presses against the hardness of Jack’s dick and he hears the faintest, quietest moan breathed into the back of his neck. 

Fuck. Fuck. So, Jack was hard and now Vernon had touched him and earned a reaction. Vernon’s stomach is hot with shame, but something else, something that scares him. Why is he interested? Why is he even thinking about Jack’s dick? It was fucked up. 

Maybe it’s just because it’s been so long since Vernon’s had sex. It’s been a long time since he’s been intimate, fuck, he hasn’t even really been jerking off since Jack moved in, too embarrassed and paranoid about being caught. He can feel Jack hot and warm against him, feel Jack’s hard dick, it was a natural reaction that Vernon would get turned on too, right? 

No, it wasn’t okay and Vernon is a sick asshole for enjoying the feeling of Jack pressing up against him. 

Vernon hears Jack hum from behind him and the deep rumbling sound sends chills down Vernon’s spine, makes him shiver in Jack’s hold. He can feel Jack shift and Vernon holds his breath as he’s sure Jack is waking up. 

“Mm? Oh...fuck…” Jack murmurs, his voice so deep, low near Vernon’s ear, “Fuck.” And then Jack is rolling away from Vernon’s body. 

Vernon misses the warmth almost instantly. He’s afraid to face Jack, afraid that there might be something written on his face that shows how much he didn’t hate feeling Jack’s dick pressing against him. 

Vernon rolls onto his stomach, rubbing his face into the pillow under him as if he were just now waking up himself, as if he had no idea that any of this had happened. 

“Mmm, good morning,” Vernon says softly. 

Jack’s got the blanket over him and Vernon’s not looking at his crotch, so he can’t judge whether Jack’s still hard, or if the blanket is helping to hide it at all. 

“Morning,” Jack says, his cheeks undeniably red. 

Vernon isn’t going to press Jack on what happened, not when he already knows. He can live with the both of them pretending nothing happened at all. 

Jack, on the other hand, has different ideas. 

“I..um, this is a little awkward, but...when I woke up, um, I was kinda sportin’ a hard on,” Jack says, his face going darker as he talks, “So, I’m, uh, really sorry if you felt that at all? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” 

“It’s okay. Morning wood is a thing,” Vernon says, “Don’t worry about it.” Jack is braver than him and Vernon’s a shit-head who can’t confess that he did feel Jack hard, and that he maybe liked it more than he should have, “I didn’t even notice.” 

“Well, that’s a relief, I guess,” Jack says, his hand covering his face, “Hell, I feel really bad about it though.” 

“Don’t,” Vernon says, “It’s cool, Jack.” It feels strange for him to be comforting Jack now when Vernon feels like the asshole in the situation. Jack nods but his face is still flushed. 

“It’s been awhile, I suppose. Tensions build up and whatever.” 

Vernon nods, “I get it. I’ve been on a dry-streak myself.” 

Jack smooths a hand over the comforter that’s covering his legs. 

“I’ll try and make sure that doesn’t happen again.”

“It’s not like you’re the only dude who’s ever woken up with an erection.” 

“The first one that’s woken up next to _you_ with an erection?” 

“Well,” Vernon says, “You got me there. That is a first.” 

Jack groans into his hands and Vernon laughs, pushing down the feelings from earlier. He was confused, he was sleep-addled. He doesn’t want Jack. He doesn’t want to sleep with Jack. No way. 

“Let’s just have breakfast and forget about this,” Jack says. 

“Sounds like a plan,” Vernon says, eager to move on himself, to distance them from the strange and scary feelings from this morning. 

\--

Over their breakfast Jack glances up from his phone. 

“Kevin is asking me if I want to go out to a bar tonight. You want to come with?” 

“Oh,” Vernon says. He debates on whether he wants to go out. He’s used to his bars, and what he’s comfortable with, but he hasn’t seen Kevin in forever, and he hasn’t been out to have fun in a long time either, “Would Kevin mind?” 

“You know he wouldn’t,” Jack says, “I’ll let him know we’ll meet him tonight.” 

“Where’s it going to be?” Vernon asks. Kevin was a lot more outgoing than Vernon, reminded Vernon of a college student who could ‘bro’ it up with the best of them, and fit easily into any social situation, Vernon wasn’t really like that. 

“Dunno,” Jack says, as he taps on his phone, likely texting Kevin, “Some bar he’s been raving about. He said the music s’good.” 

“Well then I’m sold,” Vernon says. He likes making plans but he always gets this sliver of anxiety that slithers through his stomach, reminding him that he’s going to be out around people he doesn’t know, how he might embarrass himself. He isn’t going to be alone though, he’s going to have Jack and Kevin with him. 

“Awesome,” Jack says, “It’ll be nice to go out and have fun.” 

They eat a late lunch. Vernon deciding to help Jack this time since Jack had cooked for them so many times before. They’re making homemade breakfast burritos - Jack’s idea - and Vernon is standing at the counter, chopping up potatoes on the cutting board. 

He listens to Jack hum as he fries up scrambled egg and chorizo mix in the frying pan.

“All done,” Vernon says, sliding up next to Jack to set the chopped little squares of potato on the counter next to him. Jack smiles softly at Vernon. 

“Great job. You have a knack for cutting.” 

“Oh, yeah, I’m handy with a knife. As dangerous as I am skilled.” Vernon holds the knife in his hand like he’s ready to stab an intruder, “I can definitely protect you.” 

“My hero,” Jack says, his hands squeezing at Vernon’s shoulders, the touch warm but brief, solid enough to leave a strange buzzing under Vernon’s skin. 

“You know,” Vernon says as he turns back to Jack, taking the onion that Jack is handing to him, “I’m really glad you moved in here.” 

“Yeah?” Jack asks. 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, feeling nervous. He always feels a certain degree of vulnerable when he opens up about how much he appreciates another person. Somehow, it’s even harder when he’s trying to explain it to Jack, “I’m just...a lot happier with you here?”

“That’s good,” Jack says, glancing back at Vernon, “I’m happy to be here. I was always worried that it’d be hard to feel at home in America, but, right now I can’t imagine being anywhere else.” 

Vernon’s heart flops around in his chest. He smiles to himself as he works to chop the onions. He feels so content, so happy. Things with Jack feel so easy. He can’t imagine how they weren’t always like this, how this wasn’t always their dynamic. 

“I need the pepper,” Jack says, his hand at Vernon’s waist as he reaches past Vernon for the pepper shaker. His palm is warm and open against Vernon’s side. 

Something blooms hot and wild in Vernon’s stomach, some feeling that Vernon doesn’t want to look too closely at, feeling like if he inspects it too much then everything will begin to unravel around him. Vernon pushes down that burgeoning feeling down into the pit of his stomach as he slides the onions into a glass bowl to set next to the potatoes, dancing around Jack in the process. Even with Jack away from him he can still feel where Jack’s hand had been warm and solid against his skin. 

“Aye, look how good this looks,” Jack says and Vernon turns to see Jack with his phone pointed at his face, “Don’t you think Vernon?” 

Vernon goes pink, “Are you filming?” 

Jack laughs and Vernon sees the video end, sees the familiar layout of Snapchat. 

“Just a snap. Is that okay?” Jack asks. 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “Of course it is.” 

“Good,” Jack says, lifting his phone again, “Because we’re filming a sequel.” 

Before Vernon can object, Jack hitting the record button and filming them again. 

“I’m making a lovely lunch for my husband,” Jack says, panning the camera to Vernon. 

Vernon gives a weak wave, “Hey.” 

“Basically, I’m the best husband ever.” 

Jack pans back to Vernon, awaiting his response. Vernon sighs, “You totally are.” 

The snap ends and Jack sends it off into the internet. 

“You just admitted to everyone that I’m the best husband ever,” Jack says, stepping close to Vernon and waggling his eyebrows. 

Vernon can smell his cologne, the sweet natural scent of Jack, the coffee they had drank that morning. It all makes his head spin. Every time he hears the husband term it’s like a shock to his system, a jolt, like a surprise every time. It’s hard to wrap his head around it. Legally, yes, they are married. Legally, he is Jack’s husband. 

That weird feeling flutters across Vernon’s insides and he forces a laugh as he puts his hand on Jack’s shoulder, keeping a distance between the two of them. 

“I’ll get you a trophy or something. A little plastic one.” 

Jack smiles, but he watches Vernon, his eyes trailing Vernon’s movements like he’s trying to understand them, like Vernon isn’t covering anything up the way he thinks he is. 

Vernon shrugs off the feelings, shrugs off Jack’s looks, and he continues to help with lunch. They’re supposed to meet Kevin at the bar around six, which gives them just enough time to eat and shower, and then head out and hope that the traffic doesn’t slow them down too much. 

\--

Vernon and Jack make it to the bar by six-thirty. Kevin’s already seated on a stool, drink in hand as loud thumping music plays overhead. The bar isn’t Vernon’s usual scene, a little more mainstream than the places he tends to hang out at, but he follows Jack up to the bar. 

“Hey!” Kevin says, leaping up and pulling Jack in for a hug before he releases him and goes for Vernon next. 

“Hey, Kev!” Vernon says. 

“Man, I haven’t seen you guys since the wedding!” Kevin says, throwing his arm around Jack’s shoulders, “You got a bun in the oven, yet?” he asks, patting Jack’s stomach and laughing brightly. 

Jack snorts and knocks Kevin’s hands away, “Stop that. How much have you had to drink so far?” 

“Just two,” Kevin says, holding two fingers up. 

“You’re such a light-weight,” Jack says with a laugh. 

“Alright, well, fuck, you two just gotta catch up to me.” 

Kevin tugs them towards the bar and they take seats on the stools next to Kevin’s spot, Jack between the two of them and Vernon on the end. 

Vernon orders a beer to start out with, not sure how much he wants to drink, and honestly, he’s sort of a light-weight too, getting buzzed easily, giving in to the feeling of being warm and giggly, of feeling soft and featherlight. Jack orders a Guinness to start, and Vernon knows Jack can drink a shit-ton and be fine. Vernon’s witnessed it first hand after two Stout Trains with him, where Jack was the last man standing. 

“How’s married life treating you?” Kevin asks, elbows on the bar as he leans over and shouts his question at the both of them. 

Vernon feels his face getting hot. Kevin’s joking, maybe, probably. Kevin knows it isn’t real, so he’s likely asking to tease them, or maybe he just honestly wants to know how it’s going for them. 

“It’s great,” Jack says automatically, “We were just talkin’ ‘bout how happy we are today.”

Vernon feels his face go even darker. He’s sure of it. He already has a hard time feeling vulnerable, but now Jack was offering up their feelings to Kevin too. 

“Aw, you two are so cute,” Kevin coos at them, “Real #relationship goals.” 

“How are you and your girl?” Jack asks, turning the question back at Kevin. 

Kevin sighs, “Man, I don’t know honestly. Feels like we’re always too busy to see each other. She had some assignment stuff due for her classes. She couldn’t come out tonight.” 

Vernon trails off listening to Kevin talk about his relationship. There’s a live-band playing loud and shitty music on a tiny stage, a handful of people watching their set. It isn’t the usual stuff Vernon enjoys, but it’s the kind of brash and rough music he could appreciate, if just for the rawness of it, the unpolished, but real emotion behind it all. 

When he focuses back in Jack’s a little over halfway done with his drink and Kevin’s got a fresh one in his hands. Vernon takes a big swig of his beer. It’s not the best, but he’s been drinking crap beer for years and he’s almost immune to the taste at this point. 

“Congrats on the game by the way,” Kevin says, leaning against Jack so he can get closer to Vernon, “That’s rad dude!” 

“Hey, thanks, man,” Vernon says, “It was a lot of hard work, but it paid off. What about you? How’s work?” 

Kevin launches into a spiel about how editing for movie trailers is a whole world away from YouTube videos, how it’s less pressure, more fun for him and Vernon listens, ready to slip into someone else’s world for a while, making his own a small and distant thought in the back of his head. 

Twenty minutes later and Vernon’s worked his way through two beers and one shot - courtesy of Kevin - and he was now ordering a mixed drink, a second of whatever Jack had been drinking because Jack was raving about it, nudging Vernon in the ribs and telling him to order one too. 

A while ago Kevin’s had declared that he had to hit the bathroom. He’s been gone close to a good ten minutes now and hasn’t come back yet, leaving just Vernon and Jack up at the bar. 

“Think we should check on him?” Vernon asks. 

“Maybe in like three minutes?” Jack says, “He might have gotten distracted on his way back.” Vernon watches Jack scan the area around them, trying to spot Kevin in the midst of the crowd. 

Suddenly, there are hands on Jack’s shoulders and those hands certainly don’t belong to Kevin. They belong to a girl. She’s stunning, blonde, bright eyes, a pink lipped smile. Her hands resting delicately on Jack’s shoulders. 

Jack tips his head back to look up at her and Vernon watches, eyebrow raised. Did she know him? 

“Hi,” the girl says sweetly. 

“Hi?” Jack says, offering her a smile. 

The girl steals Kevin’s seat, dropping down next to Jack. She smiles bright and just a little coy, something practiced, like she knows this game by heart.

“I couldn’t help but notice you across the way,” she says, her voice smooth like honey.

“Oh?” Jack says, turning on that charm, that smile that could get him whatever he wanted in this world. Vernon takes a sip of his beer, his stomach is feeling weird, maybe he should slow down a little. 

“Yeah, would you like to come dance with me? I wanna show you off to my friends.” 

“Oh,” Jack says. He glances at Vernon, but the girl’s eyes don’t follow. Vernon waves a hand, wipes at his mouth with the back of his palm. 

“Go on if you want,” Vernon says, though the words feel strange in his mouth, his tongue feels oddly bitter, and he doesn’t think it has anything to do with the beer. 

“Yeah, okay,” Jack says, his eyes lingering on Vernon for a moment before they meet the girl, “Sure, for a song or two.” 

Vernon watches as the girl stands. She takes Jack’s hand in hers and leads him towards the dance floor. Vernon feels invisible. He watches Jack and the girl disappear into lights, people, the deep thrumming music, until he loses sight of the both of them. 

He takes a deep pull from his beer. Now he was alone up here. No Kevin, no Jack. Just a fucking _loser_ sitting alone at the bar. The girl hadn’t even looked at him, not once, but Vernon didn’t blame her. How could he be expected to be noticed when he was sitting with Jack? Jack, who was devastatingly handsome, funny, charming, kind. Vernon didn’t stand a chance. Vernon might as well not even be here. 

Light catches Vernon’s wedding ring, glinting off of it and creating a weird splattering effect on the side of his beer bottle. He looks at his ring and feels stupid suddenly. He looks like a married guy out here, but Jack had a ring on too and it didn’t stop the girl from hitting on him or Jack from saying yes to dancing with her. 

“Hey!” Kevin says, finally returning from the bathroom and reclaiming his seat, “Where’s Jack?”

“Some girl came and asked him to dance,” Vernon says. 

“Really?” Kevin says, he’s spinning in his seat to scan the dance floor, “Oh! I see them. Dang, she’s hot as hell.” 

Vernon’s insides prickle and he kind of wants Kevin to shut-up, but he doesn’t know how to say it without sounding weird. He drinks more of his beer instead. 

“Kinda sucks you two have to live together. Makes getting laid kinda hard. Unless Jack goes back to her place or-” 

“Why do you think he’ll sleep with her? It’s just a dance,” Vernon says, maybe a bit more sharply than he had meant to. His insides feel hot, his skin feels suddenly too tight, the room feels too hot, the music that Jack and the girl are dancing to sucks and is too loud. Vernon wants to go home. He wants to be anywhere but this fucking club. 

Kevin blinks. He’s drunk and it’s not really cool of Vernon to lash out at him. He’s about to apologize to his friend when Kevin lets out a little giggle. 

“Man, you got the part of the jealous wife down pat. Good one.” 

Vernon feels sick. Everything he had been trying to tamper down is rising in him, a whole series of red flags and sirens going off all at once. He’s jealous. He knows he is, knows the feeling, but the thing that’s fucking him up, that’s derailing his head, is that he doesn’t know _who_ he’s jealous of. 

He has no reason to be jealous that Jack is dancing with a girl. Jack isn’t his. They aren’t a real fucking couple, and not to mention that Vernon is _straight_. So why...why does he feel jealous? None of it is real. It isn’t real. He’s married to Jack, but they aren’t _married_. Jack has every right in the world to dance with any pretty girl he wants. And once it’s all over, once he’s got his green card and he’s safe and secure in America, then he’ll dance with those girls, he’ll kiss them, he’ll love them, he’ll make them dinner, and cuddle with them, watch his weird musicals with them. Everything Vernon has right now will someday belong to someone else. 

Once it’s all over Vernon will be alone. The apartment will be quiet, will feel too big and too empty. He’ll go back to Postmating his dinner, grinding his coffee, sleeping in the bed without fear of waking up curled against someone. 

Vernon’s heart feels too fast for his chest. His fingers are gripped too tight around the beer bottle. Kevin’s rambling at him and Vernon can’t hear him. All he can hear is the rushing sound of blood in his ears. It’s like something inside of him crumbles, something he had built has given up, has fallen apart, and a rush of shit he’s kept quiet, things he’s ignored, boxed away, it all comes to light in a jumbled mess in his chest. 

He has feelings for Jack. 

They were playing pretend and somewhere Vernon began to enjoy it too much. Somewhere he stopped pretending, somewhere along the way he began to want it for real, to fall for Jack. It was stupid, it was wrong. It was the dumbest thing he could ever do, so, of course he did it. Of course, it happened. It was only following the pattern set-up in Vernon’s life, twenty-eight years of Murphy’s Law and it doesn’t look like it’s stopping anytime soon. 

Vernon wants to wretch the ring off his finger. He wants to leave it on the bar. He wants to abandon Kevin and Jack and catch an Uber home. It’s been awhile since he’s had a panic attack, but it feels close to this, to now. His head spinning with thoughts he didn’t want to hear. 

“I... I need some air,” Vernon mumbles as he stands, his legs wobbling under him as he hurries through the crowd, past the bouncers, and emerges into the warm California night. Vernon walks down the sidewalk, past the people trying to get into the club. He just wants to be away from everyone. Kevin isn’t following him. Jack is preoccupied. It’s so easy to get away. 

He walks around the corner of the bar, leaning against the rough brick-faced edge, his mind buzzing with everything, with a realization that feels like a punch to the gut. Vernon had always found Jack handsome, found him attractive and charming, but he always saw it under the lens of wanting to _be_ Jack and not be _with_ Jack. Maybe it was both? Maybe Vernon was damn blind. Maybe he set himself up for disaster from the get-go by offering this to Jack. 

Vernon breathes, tries to calm himself down, his legs shaking. He wasn’t scared of being attracted to a man. He feared being attracted to _Jack_. Jack, his friend, the one he’s doing a favor for. It was wrong to catch feelings and if Jack knew… if he knew, maybe he wouldn’t want to be Vernon’s friend anymore, maybe he wouldn’t want to be in the apartment anymore. Maybe he’d never speak to Vernon again. 

“Vernon?” he hears his own name being called, soft and sweet. It’s Jack. That Irish lilt unmistakable, “Fuckin’ where is he? Vernon!” Jack calls a little louder. 

Vernon takes a breath. He closes his eyes and then he shakes off any feelings, tries to numb himself as he steps around the corner and comes face-to-face with Jack. 

“God, there you are. Kevin said you took off. He was worried,” Jack says, his face serious, but relieved at the same time. 

“I just needed some air. The club is too loud,” Vernon lies. It feels like all he can do is lie, “Shouldn’t you be dancing?” Vernon asks, unable to resist bringing up the one thing that’s hurting him, like picking at a scab, not letting it heal over. 

Jack arches an eyebrow. “I got done dancing with the lass and came back to the bar. I noticed you were gone and asked Kevin what was up.” 

“I said I’m fine. Don’t let me ruin your night. Go dance with that girl, take her home, do whatever you want.” 

“Vernon…” Jack says, “What the hell are you talking about? I don’t know that girl. She’s here with a bachelorette party. She wanted to dance so we danced and now we’re done. I didn’t mean to leave ya to babysit Kevin. I just-” 

“I’m not mad about that,” Vernon says. He feels stupider by the second, his jealousy rearing up. 

“Then what are you mad about?” Jack asks, calm and smooth, his brows knitting together in confusion. 

“ _Nothing_ ,” Vernon says, feeling like a child, “I’m fine. I told you that.” 

Jack is quiet as he stares at Vernon, like he’s trying to read him, and hell, maybe he can. Maybe this whole jig has been up for longer than Vernon thought. He doesn’t know. 

“Okay,” Jack says, but he doesn’t sound like he believes it, “Do you want to go back into the bar?” 

Vernon bites his lip, “I think. I’m just going to call an Uber and go home. This isn’t my scene and I don’t want to ruin your night.” He fishes out his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans and pulls out a twenty, offering it to Jack, “Will you cash me out at the bar?” 

“Yeah, sure,” Jack says, accepting the money from Vernon, “You want me to wait with you?” 

“No,” Vernon says, “I’ll be fine. You have fun.” 

Jack hums, he’s frowning. Vernon hates when he looks like that, like he did when he was worried about getting deported. He hates that he’s being cold to Jack when all he wants to do is earn Jack’s smiles, Jack’s laughter, feel Jack’s attention on him every day for the rest of his life. 

God-fucking-damn he was pathetic. 

The two of them are standing outside in the warm California night, neon lights from the bar and surrounding building bouncing off each other, soaking their skin. The traffic whizzing by, the people entering the bar talking excitedly in the distance, but here was Jack and Vernon, staringeach other down, neither knowing what to say to fix whatever had gone wrong. 

“I’ll, uh, I’ll see you at home then,” Jack says, breaking the silence, shaking his head a little, as if he were disappointed with the outcome of the night. 

Vernon nods, “Yeah. See you then.” 

Jack gives a little nod and then he’s turning away from Vernon and walking back into the bar, leaving Vernon alone on the corner to call for an Uber. 

\--

Vernon rides home in the back of the Uber, thankful that his driver doesn’t seem to want to talk, maybe he can just sense the shit mood that Vernon is suddenly in. Vernon leans his head back against the leather seat, closes his eyes, wills his mind and body to make sense to him. He feels lost, confused, his heart racing like he just ran a mile, while on the outside he’s perfectly still. 

He can’t stop seeing the concern lacing Jack’s features, how he seemed hurt by Vernon’s words, how Vernon never wants to be a thing that hurts Jack or anyone else. Why did he have to be so stupid? Why couldn’t he do this favor for Jack and not be a fucking weirdo? Why was he ruining everything for Jack and himself? 

The next time Vernon opens his eyes he’s at his apartment building. He bids his driver a good night as he slides out of the backseat. Vernon climbs the stairs to his apartment and slips inside. The interior of the place still smells like chorizo from their lunch, when things were good, before Vernon fucked everything up with his stupid fucking heart. 

Michael pads out into the living room, rubbing against Vernon’s ankles. He bends down and scoops her up, rubbing over her sleek body. 

“There’s my girl,” He says. 

 

Michael butts her head against his palm and mews lightly. He sets her down and she swirls around his ankles once more, looking like a shark cutting through water. She moves towards the front door, sitting in front of it, watching it expectantly. 

Something twinges inside of Vernon’s chest. He toes off his sneakers and walks over to the couch before collapsing on it, stretching his body out along the cushions.

“He’s not here, Mike,” Vernon says, as if Michael really understands him. 

Michael meows at him and looks at the door once more before she gives up and pads back to Vernon, jumping from the floor and landing squarely on Vernon’s chest, a warm and solid weight. Already the apartment feels dimmer, lonelier, a reminder of the life Vernon was leading before Jack came along. He’d better get used to the feeling because someday, he’d know it again. 

Vernon puts his phone and glasses on the coffee table next to him, his other hand petting Michael, who begins to purr on his chest. She nuzzles against his hand, rubbing against the wedding ring on Vernon’s finger. He looks at it. The heavy burden he’s wearing on his hand. A lie. A symbol of just how fucking stupid he is. Right now, Vernon can’t stand the sight of it. He wiggles the ring off his finger and sets the simple gold band on the coffee table next to his glasses. His hand feels bare, strangely naked, a faint white line of the ring still ghosting across his skin, how he can take it off, but he can’t escape it, not really. 

Vernon closes his eyes, his hand resting on Michael’s back. He lets the smooth rumbling of her purrs lull him to sleep. 

\--

Vernon wakes up the next day still out on the couch. He’s sore and he feels a little like he’s been run over with a truck. He sits himself up, rubbing his eyes, grabbing for his glasses on the coffee table in front of him. Vernon slides them on and he wonders if Jack ever came home last night. He never woke up to anyone coming in, but it’s possible he slept through it. 

As Vernon stands from the couch he isn’t sure which outcome he wants more. He doesn’t know if he wants Jack to be here at the apartment or if he wants to be alone, be away from Jack. The scarier thing to him is that if Jack isn’t here then, where is he? Where did he sleep last night? Vernon pictures the girl in his head, the pretty girl that fits with Jack perfectly. His stomach rolls with a wave of sickness. 

Vernon walks softly to the bathroom and on the way, he none too subtly peers into his own bedroom. In the soft warm light of the morning he can make out Jack’s figure in the bed, bundled under the covers, a foot sticking out from beneath the blankets. 

Vernon feels relief, but at the same time his anxiety spikes, like a double-edged sword passing through him. He wants Jack here, but he doesn’t know how to deal with everything that’s swirling in his head. All the times they’ve cooked together, all the quiet nights they’ve shared leaned side-by-side, their quiet confidences in one another, the way their lives have melded into one shared thing, the feeling of their bodies aligned in bed. All of them being things that Vernon loves, things that make his heart beat fast, things he never wants to end. 

Vernon dips into the bathroom, trying to be quiet as to not wake Jack. He isn’t sure what time Jack came home or if he’s going to be dealing with a hangover, but Vernon just isn’t ready to think about any of it. He’s embarrassed by the way he acted last night, how upset he got, and he doesn’t feel like he can explain it to Jack, at least, not without giving everything away. 

Vernon goes back out into the living room, still wearing his outfit from last night, still tasting beer stagnant on his tongue. He sees his phone and the ring on the table. The uncomfortable feeling sloshes around in his belly at the sight of it, but he still picks it back up and slides it on.

He’s not hungover but Vernon still feels crap. He pushes off the couch and goes into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee, hoping it can take the sting out of the morning. There have been several times in his life where Vernon’s wished like hell that a good cup of coffee could solve all his problems. He leans against the counter, watching the coffee pot whirr to life. He’s conflicted, feeling both hot and cold for Jack. This new burgeoning set of feelings is confusing enough, but now it’s coupled with the bitterness from last night, even if Vernon knows he’s being a little unreasonable about being jealous. 

They are married, but not really, and Jack didn’t owe Vernon any real amount of time or attention. What Jack chooses to do and who he chooses to do it with isn’t Vernon’s business. He knows it, he does, but the truth of it all still makes his stomach hurt. 

Vernon’s still trying to figure out what to do, still trying to sort the tangled yarn of his thoughts, when Jack pads out into the living room. His hair is disheveled, he’s shirtless and sleep-warm, and as soon as Vernon sees him he has a very real and very strong ache in his chest. 

Jack yawns and stops moving when he finds Vernon. He looks small, worried, and Vernon’s heart twists. 

“Good morning,” Jack says, his voice so thick. 

“Hey,” Vernon says. He aims for normal, but he isn’t sure where he lands, somewhere between awkward and pissed maybe. There was a reason he was single, a reason he couldn’t make relationships last, even with people he really loved. It might not be the same reason shit is falling apart with Jack, but it hurts to think that he and Jack will be another thing that Vernon failed at, another thing he struggles to forget. 

“You slept on the couch last night,” Jack says, glancing at the aforementioned piece of furniture. 

“Yeah, I just kind of passed out there last night, I guess.” 

“You weren’t wearing your ring,” Jack points out and Vernon watches as his eyes drift to Vernon’s hand, as if checking for the ring. It’s there and Vernon can feel it, like a weight, like a link between the two of them. Jack’s own matching band glitters on his finger in the light of the room. 

“It’s on now,” Vernon says, for lack of anything better to say, without giving Jack the real reason he took it off in the first place. 

Vernon always considered himself good at reading people, at figuring situations out. He was socially awkward most of the time, but it didn’t mean he didn’t understand what was happening, it just meant he didn’t understand how to react to it. For how good he thought he was at people, Jack is a million times better. He’s charming, he’s kind, he knows how to make people adore him and he does it all without any insincerity. 

It’s like that now. The way that Jack’s looking at Vernon, he just knows, he can tell that Jack is trying to read him, trying to figure out the inner workings of Vernon’s mind, and really, the thought terrifies him. The thought of Jack knowing Vernon’s feelings, nothing seems scarier than that right now. 

“What happened last night?” Jack asks, walking into the kitchen, taking a seat on the little stool that Vernon has set up near the counter. He watches Vernon with heavy eyes. 

Vernon prickles under Jack’s gaze, his mouth going into a flat line. He doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want to talk about it. He wants to go back to pretending. When it was all fake, when Jack was nothing more than one of his best friends, a roommate, a cute and charming co-worker. 

“Vernon,” Jack says again, more earnestly. He can tell something is up and he doesn’t like it. He wants to fix it, because that’s what Jack does. He fixes things. He saves them all the time. “Please just tell me what’s wrong. I don’t like to see you upset.” 

Vernon closes his eyes, his heart squeezing in his chest. Why did Jack give a shit about him? Why did Jack want to help him? Why didn’t Jack see that Vernon wasn’t worth the effort?

“I told you last night,” Vernon says, slipping back into his lies, back into the façade that everything is fine and that he isn’t tumbling head over heels for Jack and ruining both of their lives in the process, “I just felt overwhelmed. Sometimes I get like that. I just needed to go home and be alone, I guess.” 

Jack is quiet as he studies Vernon.

“You like being alone?” 

“Yes and no,” Vernon says, “Sometimes I just want quiet and not to deal with anyone, more often than not I’m lonely.” 

“I’m sorry,” Jack says, “I’m sorry you don’t get alone time anymore ‘cause of me. ‘M always hangin’ around, always in yer space. It isn’t fair to you.”

Guilt hangs like a rope thick around Vernon’s neck, tightening with each word that Jack speaks. 

“Don’t apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He was going to drive Jack away from him. Whether he told the truth or not it felt like Jack was going to leave no matter what Vernon did. He’s a fuck-up, and he can’t keep things solid or steady for longer than a month or two. 

“You were pissed at me last night,” Jack says, “I could tell you were real fuckin’ irritated with me.” 

“I’m sorry,” Vernon says, “I was being stupid.” 

“Maybe you were…but I still don’t really understand _why_.” 

Vernon closes his eyes again, focuses on his breathing. His anxiety is spiking, climbing up his throat like a monster eager to escape, like a toxic sludge ready to spill out and contaminate everything in the apartment. 

“I don’t know,” Vernon says, looking at Jack, “I really don’t know.” He’s lying, God, but he can’t. He can’t tell Jack the truth. He can’t offer that up. It would ruin everything, Jack would leave, Arin would hate him. Vernon can’t. He just can’t, “I don’t want to fucking talk about this! Can we just go on with our lives?” 

“But you’ll still be upset,” Jack says, remaining calm in the face of Vernon’s rising mood. How was he so calm, how was he so good all of the time? Vernon loved it as much as it infuriated him. 

“People get upset, Jack,” Vernon says, “Normal people show their emotions and don’t hide them behind cheery moods and charming smiles!” 

Jack’s eyes widen and he stares at Vernon in surprise, a thin line of tension at his jaw where he’s clenching his teeth together. 

“And some people talk to each other instead of one actin’ like a goddamn child and throwing a fit,” Jack says firmly. 

Vernon feels like he’s been punched, his anxiety mixing with anger. This conversation is going all wrong, their train fallen off the track and he doesn’t know how to fix it, how to stop any of this. All he can do is buckle up and pray that when it hits the wall, it isn’t too hard, not hard enough to kill. 

“I do talk to people, maybe I just don’t want to talk to _you_ right now.” 

“Christ, Vernon, that’s what people who are married _do_.” Jack says, running a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated, the shell of his demeanor breaking down. He looks a little wild, on edge in a way that Vernon’s never seen before. 

“Good thing we’re not _really_ married then, right?” Vernon says, “Good thing it’s all a big fucking sham and we’re not together. I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time to talk to your wife in your next marriage, your _real_ marriage.” 

Jack is quiet, a look of hurt and surprise passing over his face. Vernon feels like he’s punched himself in the gut, feels like he’s gotten his ass kicked, but he’s the one holding the weapon, he’s the one inflicting the pain on the both of them. 

“You’re right,” Jack says, nodding, but his eyes flicker with something, some darkness that Vernon can’t place, “You’re right. We’re not real.” 

Vernon’s heart chips, a fine crack that runs along the edges, promising to spiderweb into a million different fractures, promising pain later, ensuring it won’t be an easy fix. It was better this way. It was better to be clear about the truth of them. They weren’t real. Jack would never love him and Vernon needed to look that fact in the eyes. 

“Maybe you should have just married someone you really loved,” Vernon says. 

Jack opens his mouth, his face unreadable to Vernon, and Vernon’s waiting for that hit, that fatal strike from Jack that’ll wound him, ground him, remind him how stupid it was to catch feelings. 

Then the coffee pot beeps loud and shrill, interrupting whatever it was that Jack was going to say. 

Vernon reaches out and turns off the pot, not at all in the mood for coffee, not feeling at home or welcome in his own apartment. He’s still dressed from last night, but his shoes are by the door, his escape route easier than Jack’s. 

He waits for a beat, to see if Jack will pick up on the unsaid words, the cliffhanger of a thought. He doesn’t, his mouth closed and pinched in a frown. 

“I’m going to go out for a little while,” Vernon says. 

“This is your place, though,” Jack says, quiet, his voice deep and careful.

His words sting. Vernon’s place. Not Jack’s. Not theirs. Vernon’s. 

Vernon strides past Jack, he goes to the door and slides on his sneakers, his keys are in the little dish next to the door and he scoops them up, Michael meowing at him as he runs away from his home, what used to be _their_ home.

And Jack doesn’t stop him. 

\--

Vernon feels stupid for leaving, but he needed to get out, to get away from Jack. The apartment feels like a car crash, where everything is sharp and dangerous, where one of them could get hurt. Vernon stops by his favorite café and grabs a burrito and a coffee because he hadn’t drunk what he made at home. Even falling back into his usual habits, eating his favorite food, he doesn’t feel any better; he feels sick, his body shaking from the exchange of words with Jack. 

Vernon doesn’t stick around the café after he grabs his breakfast, not feeling up to being in public. He can’t go home, he doesn’t want to be out in the streets. He heads to the only place that makes sense to him. He goes to the office. 

It’s Sunday so no one should be there unless Matt and Ryan came in for some last-minute recordings. When he pulls into the parking lot it’s empty and Vernon is grateful. He finds the key for the front door on his ring and then unlocks it, sliding into the familiar space. The office is his work, but Vernon’s always been the type to pour every emotion into a project, into making something. It isn’t the healthiest thing to combat his moods by ignoring them and focusing on work, but it’s what he needs, what makes sense for him, and as he climbs the minimal set of stairs that leads to the office’s main floor he already feels a little better. 

Vernon goes and sits in the kitchen with his burrito, pointedly ignoring the time that he and Jack made them at the apartment together. Try as he might to ignore it, the ‘fight’ replays in his head again and again. He can’t shake the hurt look that passed over Jack’s face when Vernon reminded him that their marriage wasn’t real. 

He also thinks about what Jack was going to say before he was interrupted. It was stupid, so stupid. Vernon knows they aren’t a real couple, he knows he and Jack won’t ever be together. Even if Jack was going to start dating boys he could do better than Vernon and they both know that, especially now. Jack deserved someone better, someone who wasn’t going to put him through the emotional wringer. 

Vernon is half-way through his burrito when he hears the office door open and he hears footsteps on the stairs. Nerves shoot up in his stomach. Was it Jack? Did he leave to find Vernon? Did he know exactly where Vernon would go to hide out? 

Vernon sets down his breakfast and waits, his body on edge, like he was a teen in a horror movie waiting to see if the killer found him or not. The footsteps draw closer and then Vernon sees Brian stepping into the kitchen, his eyes landing on Vernon straight away. 

Vernon breathes and he feels an odd mix of disappointment and relief that it isn’t Jack here to find him and talk. Jack isn’t looking for him. 

“I thought that was your car,” Brian says as he approaches the table, “What are you doing here on a Sunday?”

“I could ask you that too,” Vernon says, trying to duck the question. 

Brian moves up towards the table. He eyes Vernon carefully; he’s like Jack in a way, in the sense that Brian absolutely knows how to read people, and it looks like he’s putting things together way too quickly for Vernon’s comfort. 

“I forgot my laptop here and I need it for some NSP stuff,” Brian explains, “You look like hell.”

“Thanks,” Vernon says flatly. 

Brian sighs and he comes up to the booth Vernon’s sitting in, sliding on to the edge and sitting down, his hands folding together on the table. It makes Vernon think this is what Brian must have looked like in his professor days, when he was sitting across from a student and choosing his words carefully. Vernon feels trapped, feels pinned in a strange way. He’s scared to give up the ghost, but at the same time he’s lost, and maybe Brian can guide him out of the darkness that’s fogging up his mind. 

“You want to tell me what’s going on?” Brian asks, calm and kind, gentler than Vernon’s used to with him. 

Vernon pushes his glasses up his nose and sighs, “I don’t know where to start.” 

“Does it have to do with Jack?” Brian asks. 

Vernon looks up, his heart picking up pace in his chest. 

“I…why do you say that?” 

“I say that because you and Jack are in a tough situation right now and I understand if that’s stressful. It can’t be easy pretending to be married.” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “It’s hard. It’s way harder than I thought.” 

“Real marriage is kind of like that too,” Brian says, with a smile. 

Vernon forces one in return, but his chest is hollow and numb, he feels empty, like all the important pieces of himself have been scooped out. 

“I don’t know. We got into it this morning,” Vernon says, “I left and came here. That’s the bare bones of it.” 

“Alright, what did you fight about?” Brian asks. 

Vernon’s face is getting hot, the blush creeping over his cheeks. He’s weak, the strain of hiding his feelings for Jack is too much. He needs help, he needs advice, maybe just someone to vent to, to let all the thoughts out so he can breathe again. 

“We…” Vernon says, pointedly looking down at his food instead of Brian, “We went out to a bar last night with Kevin, and a girl was hitting on Jack…it’s so fucking stupid, but I got jealous. I got jealous because he danced with her, because other people want him, because I-“ Vernon takes a deep breath, “Because _I_ want him.” He looks up at Brian while his insides writhe with shame, “I don’t think I’m pretending anymore, Brian.” 

Brian’s face is calm and still as he watches Vernon. He doesn’t laugh, doesn’t tease, he takes it all in and Vernon appreciates it. He’s nervous still, scared to admit to anyone else that he’s falling for Jack, that he wants to be with Jack, but it’s out there, and he can’t take it back, not now. 

“That is tough,” Brian says, “I’m sorry, Vernon. I know that must be hard on you.” 

Vernon shrugs, “I’m being stupid. Jack is going to hate me when he finds out. He’s going to move out, he’ll never talk to me again.” 

“I can’t promise you how Jack will react, but that doesn’t sound like our Jack. He’s still your friend Vernon. All of this happened because you two are friends and he trusts you, you trust each other. I can’t say Jack will return your feelings, but do you really think he’d just give up on you all together?” 

Vernon focuses on the tin foil that was once wrapped around his burrito. He presses on the edge of it, watching it crumple under the force of his touch. Brian’s words sinking into him. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what would happen if Jack knew the truth. If Jack knew Vernon didn’t think of him as just a friend anymore. He was scared to lose Jack in any form, in any capacity. 

“I thought I was just lonely. I thought I just liked him around and not feeling alone, but it’s more than that. It isn’t just that I like having a roommate, I like being around him. I kind of feel like I always want to be around him,” Vernon admits. 

Brian reaches out and rests his hand on top of Vernon’s, the warm solid weight of it helping to steady Vernon’s shaken insides. 

“It’s okay to feel that way. People fall in love all the time, every day. You just happened to fall in love with one of your best friends.” 

“And my pretend husband.” 

“Yeah,” Brian says, patting Vernon’s hand, “That too.” 

“What should I do?” Vernon asks, looking up at Brian as Brian draws his hands away from Vernon, “What do you think?” 

“I think you should tell him. If you got in a fight and he doesn’t know why, it could damage the friendship, which is what you don’t want. If you tell him how you feel, well, at least he’ll understand you better.” 

It sounded easy, simple, but it feels like the hardest thing in the world for Vernon to do. How can he tell Jack? How can he confess? He can’t even picture himself going back to the apartment and facing Jack let alone telling him about his crush, about the feelings developing inside of him. 

“I’ll try,” Vernon says. 

“That’s all you can do,” Brian says as he pats Vernon on the shoulder. He slides out of the seat, remembering his original task and why he came to the office in the first place, “Are you going to be okay?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “But I think I’m just going to hang out here for a while. Finish my breakfast, maybe get a head-start on my work for tomorrow.” 

Brian nods, “Just don’t work yourself into a downward spiral or anything.” 

“Thanks Dad,” Vernon murmurs, but he means it. He’s thankful for Brian, for all his co-workers, his friends, the people that care about him, Jack included. Sometimes he’s difficult, and sometimes his own actions don’t make sense, not even to himself, but his friends are there, the people around him are there for him and he just hopes that if he works up the nerve to tell Jack the truth, to tell him everything, that Jack will still be there when everything is said and done. 

Brian grabs his laptop and waves a goodbye to Vernon on his way out of the office. Vernon doesn’t mind being alone, he could use the time to think, to try and form what he should say to Jack, how he should explain the pissy mood he was in the night before at the bar. 

Vernon finishes his breakfast and carries his coffee to his desk where he boots up his computer. 

\--

Vernon stays at the office well into the day. He eats lunch there, snacking on the foods stored in the kitchen, the stuff Jack bought for them. By the time he decides to head home it’s almost five- ‘o-clock. Vernon checks his phone before he heads out and finds no messages from Jack, no contact from him at all. It wasn’t like Vernon texted Jack either, and Vernon was the one who said he was going to go out. Vernon was an adult and he didn’t need Jack worrying about him, but maybe Jack was angry, maybe Jack was just done. 

Vernon makes it back to the apartment. He stands outside of his own apartment like an idiot, too scared to make the move and go inside, too nervous to face Jack and talk about everything that happened, to talk about what they really need to say. 

Vernon takes a breath and unlocks the front door, slipping inside before he changes his mind. The apartment is quiet save for Michael meowing at him as she greets him at the door. Jack isn’t in the living room or the kitchen, but Vernon notices a mug sitting on the counter, filled with coffee from the pot he had made that morning before he left. On the side of the mug is a yellow sticky note. 

Vernon peels off the sticky note and notices fine, neat writing scrawled over the surface. 

_‘Vernon, I thought maybe you could use some time away from me. I’m sorry that I upset you. I’m going to stay at Kevin’s for the time being. Text me if you need me – Jack’_

Vernon reads over the note a couple of times like maybe if he keeps reading it the note will be different, the words will have changed, and Jack won’t have left the apartment. Vernon sighs and crinkles the note up in his fist, reducing it to a paper ball. He sets it on the counter and ignores the freezing cold coffee. 

He isn’t sure what to do now. He didn’t want Jack to leave, but at least he knew where Jack was. Vernon trudges to the bathroom, grabbing a towel out of the closet before he goes to turn the shower on. He feels gross, too hot, grimy, and maybe he just wants to wash the stink of failure of the entire day off him, start over, like when he emerges he’ll be someone else, someone who isn’t fucking everything up. 

The whole ride back to his apartment he had been steeling himself to tell Jack the truth, to tell Jack why he was upset at the bar, why he was being weird and shitty, and even though he was scared out of his mind, Vernon was still going to do it, going to leap head-first into the conversation regardless of a safe landing. But now Jack was gone, and Vernon can feel the bravery evaporating from him, mixing with the steam from the shower, dissipating into nothingness. 

Vernon showers, trying not to think about Jack, about what happened, about the conversation he and Brian had. It’s hard when he sees Jack’s shampoo in the shower, when he can smell the rich spicy soap that Jack likes to use, all of Jack’s things still residing in the apartment, like relics, little reminders of the person missing from his life. 

The shower doesn’t take long and when Vernon gets out he feels refreshed, renewed in a weird way. Showers always give him a small boost of energy, always clear his head a little, and he’s glad it still works for him, even now. 

Vernon pads to his bedroom…their bedroom; doesn’t feel like just his own anymore. He goes to dress and he notices Jack’s clothes still tucked into the dresser, Jack’s personal effects still strewn over the top of the nightstand, all reasons for Jack to come back again. 

Vernon tugs on a pair of boxers and crawls into bed. Even the sheets around him smell like Jack, like his deodorant, the pillows smell like his shampoo, the blanket rumpled from when Jack last used it the night before when he slept alone in the bed. Vernon lies there, turned on his side, tired and drained from the day, from arguing with Jack. He hates conflict, hates feeling like there is something wrong in his life that he can’t fix right away. 

Vernon sighs, hooks his phone up to the charger, sets his glasses down on top of his phone, and closes his eyes as he lies in bed. He doesn’t mean to fall asleep, but he does, passing out quickly and easily.

\--

The next time Vernon wakes up its morning and his phone is buzzing noisily on the nightstand next to his bed. 

“Shit,” Vernon says, heart racing as he sits himself up. Is he late for work? He grabs for his phone and his glasses, realizing that the buzzing on his phone isn’t an alarm, but a call from Arin. Fuck. Was he in trouble? Did Jack talk to him? Vernon quickly swipes his thumb over the answer button to pick-up Arin’s call. 

“Hello?” he says, trying not to sound like he just woke up. 

“Vernon, hey, sorry to call so early, but I wanted to give you a heads-up. Our lawyer called me this morning and said that Immigration got a hold of him. They’ve scheduled you and Jack for a meeting tomorrow at one.” 

Fuck. Really? It had to be now? When shit was going all wrong? This was the worst possible timing and Vernon can’t help but feel like the universe is picking on him a little. 

“Vernon?” Arin says. 

“I’m here, sorry. I, yeah, that works for me, I guess. We don’t really have a choice, do we?” 

“Not really,” Arin says, sounding sympathetic, “A lot of it is going to depend on you and Jack and maintaining the ruse.” 

“Great,” Vernon mumbles. He doesn’t really want to let on that he and Jack are struggling at the moment, that Jack isn’t even staying in the damn apartment and now they have the government on their asses, “Did you call Jack?” 

“Yeah, right before I called you. He sounded about as excited as you do,” Arin says, “Are you guys okay?” 

“We’re alright,” Vernon says, feeling bad lying to Arin, when Arin’s doing so much for them, so much to make it all work and to help them, “We’ll be alright.” 

Arin hums, as if he isn’t fully convinced, but hell, neither is Vernon for that matter. 

“Just let me know if there is anything I can do,” Arin says, “I’ll text you the address of the meeting place.” 

“Okay, thanks Arin.” 

The two of them hang up and Vernon sits in his bed, his phone still in hand, his heart racing as anxiety fills him. Their fight couldn’t be happening at a worse time. It was now, when shit was at its worst that he and Jack had to prove their love, prove that their relationship was real. Vernon was already nervous about trying to sneak one by Immigration, but now, well, he was downright terrified that they’d figure it out as soon as they took one look at Jack and Vernon. 

Vernon’s phone dings in his hand and he looks down to see Jack’s name pop-up on the screen. 

_‘Did Arin call you?’_

_‘Yeah, he did. Just now. He told me what’s up for tomorrow.’_

Vernon watches as the three little dots form, showing Jack is typing a response. 

_‘I won’t blame you if you don’t want to. I’d understand.’_

Vernon looks at Jack’s words, a hurt seeping into his chest. He sighs as he taps out a response. 

_‘You really think I’d do that to you? I’ll be there. I wouldn’t not go. I promised to help you, Jack, and I’m sticking to it.’_

Regardless of the fact that he and Jack are going through some shit, Vernon would never leave Jack in the lurch, would never abandon him when it really mattered. Jack needs this meeting to stay in the country, of course Vernon’s going to go. 

_‘Thank you, Vernon. I’ll see you tomorrow.’_

_‘See you then.’_

Vernon could apologize now, over text, he could say everything digitally and not face-to-face with Jack, but it didn’t feel right to do it that way. Jack deserves more than that and Vernon knows it, knows he has to confess to everything in the right way or it wouldn’t mean shit. 

Vernon gets up and gets dressed. He’s due at the office in an hour and he hasn’t even gotten out of bed yet. He wonders if he’ll see Jack at work. They were both supposed to be there. Would it be awkward? Would the others be able to tell that something happened? Vernon’s stomach hurts just thinking about it. 

He dresses as quickly as he can, grabs his keys, slides on his shoes, feeds Michael, and then rushes down to his car, praying that traffic is on his side for once. 

\--

Vernon gets to the office with a few minutes to spare. Arin isn’t a stickler for punctuality, but Monday’s are their group meeting days, and Vernon hates to be late on a Monday. He pads to his desk, setting down his breakfast as he tries to catch his breath. He turns on his computer and sits down in his chair to take a breather. 

“Hey, Good morning,” Ross says, his hands finding Vernon’s shoulders, squeezing them a little as he comes up behind Vernon’s chair. 

Vernon makes a surprised noise and tips his head back to look up at Ross. 

“Hey, man, what’s up?” 

“Well, Arin told me you and Jack have your first Immigration interview tomorrow.” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, his stomach rolling with a fresh round of nerves. 

“Well, I just wrote down some stuff that really helped me and Holly out when we had our interview. They’re looking for marriages to be fake, they’re suspicious as hell. You have to act like you and Jack really are together. Don’t hold back. If you do, he could get denied and you’d both be in trouble.” 

Vernon swallows, “Way to calm my nerves, Ross.” 

“Sorry, man. I just don’t want to see shit go bad for either one of you.”

Ross moves around to Vernon’s side and sets a paper down on the desk. Vernon picks it up and to his surprise it’s extremely detailed, listing ‘evidence’ that Vernon and Jack should take with them.

“Photo albums work really well. I know you guys had that photographer at the wedding.” Vernon nods, “Sometimes too, they ask you stuff, like how you guys met, when you got married, I swear to God sometimes they try to trick you. If you can’t remember something, if you’re nervous and can’t think of it, just tell them the truth because if your story doesn’t match Jack’s, well, they’ll be suspicious.” 

Vernon nods again, but his nerves are at an all-time high. A lot of things on Ross’s list he and Jack had already done because of advice from the lawyer that Arin had gotten them. Jack changed his address on his ID card, they were both on Vernon’s lease to the apartment, the bill for their internet came in Jack’s name. 

“Jack needs copies of all his important documents. His Visa renewals, passport, all that stuff.” 

Vernon looks away from the paper and up at Ross. “I don’t have that stuff. He does.” 

“Yeah, I figured, but he isn’t here today so I thought I’d tell you.” 

Vernon sets the paper back down on the desk, “Jack isn’t here?” 

Ross shakes his head. “No, I asked Arin where he was and he said Jack had asked for the day off, maybe he’s getting stuff together for the interview tomorrow. You should probably do that too, honestly.” 

Vernon frowns at the list in front of him. For a real couple, it probably felt like nothing to provide these things, to back up their relationship. He and Jack weren’t real and Vernon feels nothing but nervous about the interview, suddenly insecure in his ability to pull the wool over the Immigration Office’s eyes. 

Maybe Ross can sense Vernon’s apprehensions and doubts. He sets his hand on Vernon’s shoulder again, squeezing light and comforting. 

“Don’t stress about it. You’ve been in love before, right? Just, you know, do that but apply it to Jack.” 

Vernon nods weakly. Fuck. If only Ross knew. If only Jack knew. If only any of them knew how little Vernon had to pretend to do that. 

“Thanks, Ross,” Vernon says, and he means it. He knows Ross is only trying to help the two of them out. He’s the only one among them that has gone through this before. 

Vernon spends the next hour before the group meeting begins going through the pictures on his Instagram and Twitter, pulling any that involved he and Jack, their life in the office. He goes through Jack’s social media too, saving what he can, intending on going and printing the pictures out to take with them. 

As a wedding gift Suzy had bought their wedding photos and collected them in a thick leather album with _‘V & J’_ written in curly gold letters. He has it at their apartment, tucked on a bookshelf next to some records and some of Jack’s filmmaking textbooks from college.

Vernon stays long enough for the staff meeting to take place. He listens, though honestly, he’s distracted for most of it, only tuning in when _Dream Daddy_ comes up and they talk about the possibility of producing some DLC (Dad-Loadable Content) for the game. Arin and Ross keep glancing at him, Vernon can feel their eyes linger on him, and he thinks they both must know he’s nervous, that he isn’t all there, isn’t fully present in the meeting. Even Brian is giving him looks, which makes sense considering Brian is the only one that knows the real truth of what Vernon’s feeling are as of late. 

After the meeting is over and everyone shuffles off to their respective stations to work, Arin finds Vernon. 

“Do you wanna head out for the day? Maybe do some prep?” Arin asks, “I know you’re dedicated to the company, but I’d rather have you all set for tomorrow.” 

Vernon nods, shaky and distracted, but grateful that Arin is giving him an out. 

“Yeah, I’m going to go print some pictures I think. I’m gonna try to get as much stuff together as I can.” 

“It might be a good idea to talk to Jack too,” Arin says. 

Vernon laughs a little, “Yeah, that’d probably be helpful, wouldn’t it?” 

“Just a little,” Arin says, clapping Vernon on the back, “The lawyer is going to meet you at the Immigration Office tomorrow. If you need me just call, okay?” 

“Thanks, Arin,” Vernon says, feeling not for the first time extremely grateful that Arin Hanson is someone he knows, someone that he can call a friend. 

Vernon leaves the office and drives to the nearest CVS. He prints out the pictures he had saved earlier that day, scrolling through them as he selects the ones to be printed. His life with Jack pre-marriage, post-marriage, it’s all laid out before him. Seeing it all, it makes something shift in his chest, something warm, but sad. Vernon tries hard not to focus on it too much, wanting to stay on the task at hand, wanting to work hard to make sure they were ready for tomorrow. Regardless of what happened between he and Jack, however it would turn out, he wanted to make sure Jack was alright as far as Immigration was concerned. 

As Vernon waits for his pictures to print he takes out the folded paper from his pocket, scanning what Ross wrote for them. Most of the things Vernon has back at the apartment, tucked into the cabinet of his living room. He knows Jack wouldn’t forget his important documents, not when this whole case determined so much of his life. 

Vernon gets his pictures, paying for them at the photo counter and then heads home. When he gets back to the apartment Jack isn’t there. Vernon can’t help but feel disappointed by the fact, despite Jack telling him that he was going to give Vernon some space. 

Vernon pets Michael as he goes to the cabinet in the living room, kneeling on the floor in front of it and taking out the plastic folder that he placed their paper work in, that’s also where he keeps their monthly bills, and he scans through them to make sure he has some with Jack’s name tucked into the sleeve. 

Vernon also digs around for the photo album of the wedding, running his thumb over the gold letters stamped on the leather surface, a cut-out of a square etched into the cover, a photo tucked into the square, the picture showing Jack and Vernon at the altar, their hands laced together. Vernon recognizes the moment. That was when he felt close to a panic attack, when Jack could read that he was distressed and he had reached out to take Vernon’s hands, to comfort and center him. Vernon hadn’t realized until now that the moment had been captured on film. 

Michael butts up against Vernon’s knee, drawing his attention away from the photo album. He reaches down and pets the cat before he pushes up and sets the album and the folder on top of the coffee table. 

Vernon sits on the couch and he’s nervous, jittery about tomorrow. Meeting new people is hard for him, formal events are hard, this shit with Jack is hard, and now tomorrow it was all going to come together in a perfect storm, lots of potential for Vernon to fuck things up. 

He opens his phone and starts searching for tips on what to say and do during the process, finding several articles and videos on the subject. He spends the rest of the night alternating between pouring them over and checking his phone to see if he had gotten a text from Jack, to see if Jack had said anything else. Each time he finds no new message there’s a bite of disappointment. He wonders if Jack even misses him at all, misses being here in the apartment. 

Vernon makes himself a dinner, and by that, he just Postmates a meat and cheese platter to his apartment for entirely too much money, but cooking reminds him of Jack, of the time spent together, how easy it all felt, how easy it was so sink into a routine, how he made it so simple to fall for him. Vernon eats half his platter before he snaps the plastic tops back on and heads to bed for the night, his head and stomach swirling with doubts, with fear about what would happen tomorrow. 

\--

The next day Vernon is up early, before his alarm even goes off. He showers and gets dressed. All of the tips online said to dress presentably so Vernon throws on a pair of dress pants, one of his checkered button-up shirts, and a tie. It’s what he usually wears when he has to attend a more formal gathering so he hopes it will pass for now. 

He double and triple checks that he has the folder with their documentation and the photo album, and he fries up some eggs for breakfast, feeling almost too nervous to eat, but knowing he needs to or he’ll just pay for it later. 

He sends a text out to Jack.

_‘You up?’_

It only takes a few minutes for Jack to respond: _‘Yeah, mate. I’ll see you there.’_

Vernon eats his breakfast standing in the kitchen, leaning over the counter and his plate as to not drop any food on himself. Once he’s done eating he grabs the bits of evidence and heads to his car, pulling up the directions Arin had sent him on his phone. 

The drive to the meeting place isn’t too far and despite hitting traffic Vernon arrives with time to spare. The lawyer that Arin had hired is waiting for them and he shakes Vernon’s hand as they spot each other. 

“Vernon I’m presuming?” The lawyer asks, offering Vernon his hand. 

Vernon nods, “Yeah, nice to meet you.” 

The lawyer scans the area around Vernon, “Um, where is Jack?” 

“Oh, we, uh, we drove separately.” 

The lawyer frowns making a soft humming noise under his breath. 

“Let’s maybe not mention that in the meeting, yeah?” 

Vernon winces internally, feeling like he already fucked up, but he nods. Just a half-a-second later and the lawyer is looking up, a smile spreading across his face. Vernon turns and he catches Jack hurrying towards them. Jack is dressed up too for the most part, dress pants and a crisp white shirt that Vernon suspects he might have bought just for the occasion. 

It’s nice to see him, but seeing him in person brings back the fight, brings back the feelings. Jack looks devastatingly handsome dressed up and today is no exception. He comes to stand next to Vernon, reaching out to shake the lawyer’s hand. 

“Mr. Stevens, nice to see you again,” Jack murmurs, out of breath like he’d been rushing to get here, “I’m not late am I?” 

“No, you’re fine. Vernon and I were just a little early.” 

When Mr. Stevens mentions Vernon, Jack glances over at him, their eyes meeting for a fraction of a second before cutting away. Vernon tries to ignore the anxiety clenching at his guts. He has to act normal, he has to do this for Jack. 

“I’m hoping you two brought your evidence with you?” 

Vernon nods and holds up the cloth bag he had placed the photo album and documents into. Jack offering his own folder that’s tucked under his arm. 

“Perfect,” Mr. Stevens said, “We’ll sign-in, wait for them to call us back, and have the interview. It’s pretty standard fair. Just, it’s important to remember that I’m here to help you, and that you should be honest with the worker when they question you. If you can’t remember something it’s okay to tell them that, don’t make anything up.” 

Jack nods and Vernon feels sick, feels like he’s about to be sent to the principal’s office or something, about to be on trial for a crime he didn’t commit. He nods to show he’s listening.

“I’ll, uh, go sign us in,” Vernon says, nodding towards the desk where the check-in book is at. He pads over to it, his shoes making distant thudding noises as he walks, his heart matching the beat of his footsteps. He signs himself and Jack in and writes down the case number they were given before he heads back to Jack and Mr. Stevens. 

Mr. Stevens looks between them. “I’m going to give you boys a few minutes alone,” he says, moving towards the far wall where there’s a table set up with a percolating coffee pot and little foam cups waiting to be used. 

Jack looks up at Vernon, his expression a little sad, more worried than anything else.

“Thanks for showing up,” Jack says, his voice near whispering. 

“I told you I would. This is the whole goal. I wouldn’t let you down now.” 

Jack nods. He glances around them and then tilts his head towards a row of seats against the back wall, “You wanna sit?” 

“Yeah, sure,” Vernon says, following as Jack leads the two of them to the chairs. They’re stuck together with thin metal bars connecting the seats in a long row, bolted to the floor, the seat of the chair a thin blue padding that offers little comfort when Vernon sits down. He sets his bag on the floor near his feet, feels that awkward silence stretch between them. 

“I’m…I’m not sure what happened-“ Jack starts. 

“I don’t know if we should talk about this right now,” Vernon says, feeling his heart pick up at the thought of trying to work out their shit _now_. 

“I just…I don’t like feeling like we’re not good,” Jack says, “I want us to be good.” 

Guilt pricks at Vernon’s skin. Jack was always so kind, so ready to forgive and forget. Vernon appreciates it as much as it irritates him. It was what he and Jack had talked about before, how Jack could push issues aside in favor of making things better for the time being. 

“I want us to be good too, but we’re about to be interviewed to determine that our marriage is real, so I’m not sure now is the time to play couple’s counseling, you know?” 

Jack nods, his lip pinched between his teeth. Vernon looks over at him and sees dark rings around his eyes, sees how tired he looks, a far cry from the Jack he would see back at the apartment. Jack must feel his gaze because he looks up, their eyes meeting. 

“Are you scared?” Vernon asks. 

“Of course,” Jack says, “If something goes wrong and I get denied we’re in trouble. If they determine we’re fake I’ll get sent home for good and lose my work Visa. I might even go to jail.” He frowns, “you might too and I don’t…” he trails off, “I don’t want anything to happen to you, not because of me.” 

“Hey,” Vernon says, trying to stay calm even though Jack’s words have sent prickles of panic under his skin, “I knew what I was doing when I offered to marry you. I knew the risks. You didn’t do anything to me.” 

Jack nods, though he doesn’t seem convinced. 

“Sometimes, I think maybe it would have been easier for me to just go home. I’m trying so hard to be here, but I’m just a huge burden to everyone around me, to the company, to you. Maybe I should have just stayed put.” 

“Jack,” Vernon says, his heart aching for the man next to him. 

Jack looks at him and at the same time a deep voice calls out “Vernon Shaw-Walsh and Jack Shaw-Walsh?” and Vernon looks up to see a man standing at a far-off door, Mr. Stevens already approaching him. Jack looks at Vernon and for the first time since this all began he looks lost, helpless. 

Vernon reaches out and takes Jack’s hand, rubbing his thumb over Jack’s knuckles, “I’m glad you’re here. It’s going to be okay.” 

Jack nods and the two of them stand before grabbing their things and heading over to the man.

“Nice to meet you both,” the man says, eyeing them and the lawyer as he leads them through the door and back into a sterile beige hallway. 

“Nice to meet you,” Jack and Vernon echo. 

“I’m Theodore Stevens. I’m the attorney hired for the case,” Mr. Steven says offering the officer his hand. The man takes it, but he doesn’t seem impressed by Mr. Stevens and Vernon just hopes to God or whoever else is listening that they have a good guy on their hands. 

“I’m Officer Lapin,” the man says, “I’ll be handling the interview process today.” 

Officer Lapin leads them down the long hallway. There’s a row of cubicles on the left-hand side, people tucked into their work space, on their computers or phones, paying them no mind. Along the right-hand wall are several tan doors, some opened to reveal empty offices, some closed, and Vernon can’t help but wonder if there are people just like him and Jack behind those closed doors, if they are as scared as he is now. 

Officer Lapin stops them outside of a door on the far end, tucked into the back of the office. He opens the tan door and holds it for them, letting Vernon, Jack, and Mr. Stevens pass through before he joins them in the room. Jack, Vernon, and their lawyer sit in three chairs opposite the desk where Officer Lapin sits. 

Vernon notices a photo on Officer Lapin’s desk; two kids, a wife, though the photo looks like it’s a couple of years old by now, judging by Officer Lapin’s heavier frame and whiter hair. 

“I’m just going to be starting with some questions, pretty standard stuff. If you could please just answer what I ask you. I’ll be clear with who I am addressing so if I am asking-“ Officer Lapin looks down at the paper in front of him, “Vernon-“ he looks back up and Vernon puts a hand up to signify which one he is. Officer Lapin nods, and continues his spiel, “If I’m asking Vernon a question I don’t want Jack to answer it unless I ask him too or vice versa. Got it?” 

Vernon and Jack nod in unison. It definitely feels like being in school again, though Vernon had a harder time back then not running his mouth or getting himself in more trouble by being a smart ass. Officer Lapin doesn’t seem unnecessarily mean or like he’s out to get them, but he also isn’t the warmest person that Vernon’s ever encountered in his life. 

“I’ll start with you Jack,” Officer Lapin says, pointing at Jack, like he wants to make sure he still has the names right. 

Jack nods, “Alright.” 

“How did you and your husband meet?” 

Jack takes a breath. “We met at work. We both work for the same company.” 

“Who worked their first?” 

“I did,” Jack says, “Vernon started about two months after I did.” 

Vernon remembers that. He remembers working up the courage to quit his job at Maker Studios. He remembers texting Dan on a near nightly basis about actually going through with it, Dan encouraging Vernon to come on-board, assuring him that Vernon would love it. He finally made the leap, left his steady job for the unknown of working in the office. He knew the guys, was friendly with them, but he knew there were still risks of none of it working out in his favor, how they might not mesh well, he might not be happy, and that he might have regrets. 

He was nervous being around everyone. Arin had led him around the office and introduced him to the people that he didn’t know already. One of them was Jack. Arin had patted Jack’s shoulder. 

“He’s pretty new too. You guys should get along great. Right, Jack?” 

“Of course. I’ll show him the ropes,” Jack had teased. Still so new but already charming, already settled in like he had been there for years. Vernon liked him right off the bat. 

“Your company doesn’t have a policy about dating co-workers?” Officer Lapin asks. 

“No,” Jack says, “Our boss is pretty laid back.” 

“Alright, Vernon. What was your first date with Jack?” 

_Fuck_. They technically hadn’t had one. Why did he get the harder question? Vernon could feel his nerves shooting up, crawling up the back of his throat. The longer he stays quiet the more suspicious it looks, but thinking of that makes Vernon even more nervous. He remembers what Mr. Stevens had said, how you can admit to not remembering and maybe he should do that, but would that make things better or worse for them? 

He remembers one of the first times they hung out together. One of the first times he knew he really liked Jack a lot, wanted to be his friend. It wasn’t a date necessarily, but maybe it would work. 

“We were the only ones in our office because everyone else had gone out for lunch. Jack ordered us sushi and we ate it together in the kitchen. We talked for a long time, really got to know each other. It was nice,” Vernon says, trying not to let his voice shake. 

Jack smiles at Vernon and Vernon hopes he remembers the memory. It’s not a big one, not overall important, but it’s clear as day for Vernon in his head, something he holds on to and looks back on fondly. 

“Jack, when did you two get married?” 

“July fifteenth of this year.” 

Officer Lapin looks up at them and it’s almost as if Vernon can see a red flag going off in his mind. 

“So, not very long.” 

“No, we’re still in our newlywed phase I suppose.” 

“How long were you together before you got married, Vernon?” Officer Lapin asks. 

Goddamn it. Why did Vernon keep getting the difficult ones? The ones hard to nail down? He tries to do the math in his head. He started working for the grumps two years ago and the first ‘date’ that Vernon told Officer Lapin about was a few months after Vernon started working there. 

“About a year and a half,” Vernon says, settling on it. It feels so fucking scary to be inventing a past on a whim, to give life to their history together in a new way. It’s dumb and dangerous, but hopefully the only people in the room who know it isn’t true are Vernon and Jack. 

“So, you were together a year and a half…why not get married earlier, Jack?” 

“We didn’t want to rush into anything. We took the relationship as it came, got to know how we were together, that we’d work out as a couple.” 

“So, it had nothing to do with the fact that you were running out of time on your visa?” 

“No,” Jack says, “We just thought a summer wedding would be nice and we had a little break in time before things with our work schedule got crazy again.” 

Officer Lapin sighs and leans back in his seat, the chair creaking with the movement, loud in the quiet of the office. 

“Do you have evidence of the wedding?” 

“My clients have their marriage license signed by them and their witness Mr. Arin Hanson.” 

Vernon opens the folder and produces the marriage license handing it over to Officer Lapin. He takes the paper and reads it over. Vernon watches his eyes scanning the page and he knows it’s legit, that it’s all filled out correctly, but the act still makes him nervous. 

“We also have the photo album from our wedding,” Vernon offers, lifting it out of the cloth bag and settling it on the desk in front of Officer Lapin. 

“Where did you two get married?” Officer Lapin asks, flicking his eyes up to Vernon. 

“Verdugo Mountain,” Vernon says, “In a clearing there along a hiking trail.” 

Officer Lapin hands back the marriage license and then takes the photo album, scanning the picture on the front before he flips it open. Vernon can barely see the pictures as Officer Lapin flips through them. He sees one of the whole group of the Grumps, all posed together, smiling, laughing, Jack and Vernon in the center of it all.

He sees pictures of Audrey throwing a fistful of rose petals into the air, her grin giant as she laughs. He sees Kevin and Jack posing together, a darkened shot of he and Jack during their first dance, a photo of Suzy, Arin, and Dan hugging and raising champagne flutes into the air.

Officer Lapin closes the album and then looks at Jack and Vernon. 

“Do you have other evidence to present?” 

Vernon nods, “These are pictures of our life together, before and after the wedding,” Vernon says as he pulls out the pictures he had printed the day before. He sets them on the desk before he opens the folder again, “I also have bills with Jack’s name on them and a copy of our apartment lease with both of our names on it.” 

Vernon hands over his evidence to Officer Lapin. He isn’t sure how they’re doing. He feels like they’ve been answering the questions the right way, as plausible as possible, but this is Officer Lapin’s job. It’s his job to search out people like Jack and Vernon, people who are pretending to be married. Would he be able to tell? Be able to sniff out some giveaway, some sign that Jack and Vernon don’t even know they are putting out there? 

There is a long quiet moment where Officer Lapin surveys the evidence they presented to him. Vernon is nervous, but he hopes it doesn’t show. He looks over at Jack, his fingers wringing together, his knee jittering. Vernon reaches out on instinct and places his hand on Jack’s knee, stilling the movement. Jack looks up at him as if he suddenly remembers that Vernon is there with him and he smiles. 

“Well,” Officer Lapin starts, drawing Vernon and Jack’s attention to him, “Something I like to ask the good folks I’m interviewing is…well, it’s a simple question, really, Vernon, why do you love Jack?” 

“What?” Mr. Stevens asks. 

Officer Lapin cuts his eyes to the lawyer. “I want to know what it is about Jack that made Vernon fall for him. Why he thinks they work. You know, the basics of their relationship.”

Officer Lapin is staring at Vernon, waiting for the answer. Vernon looks at Jack and then at the officer in front of him. His heart speeding in his chest, aching with all that was left unsaid. _Just pretend_. Vernon thinks. _Do it like you’ve done all along._

“I...” Vernon starts, “he’s charming. He makes it easy to like him, it was even easier to love him. It happened naturally, felt as simple as breathing almost. When he’s around me I feel good, I feel like the best version of myself. He’s got a positive air about him. His smile is enough to make me happy, to make my stomach feel warm. I like waking up next to him and going to sleep with him, I like cooking dinner with him, watching his dumb musicals that I know nothing about. I just…I love him and…and I couldn’t imagine not waking up next to him-“ Vernon can feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes and he’s embarrassed, but he doesn’t stop, the words flowing out of him now like a river, too powerful for Vernon to quell or pull back inside, “I can’t imagine not spending every day of the rest of my life with him.” Vernon looks at Jack and Jack’s eyes are big and full of an emotion that Vernon can’t hope to read, “I love him,” Vernon finishes, looking from Jack to Officer Lapin, “I love him.” 

And Vernon knows that not a single part of him was pretending. 

Vernon pushes his glasses up off his nose, wiping at his eyes with the heel of his palm. He feels so stupid for tearing up, but he feels lighter too. He let the truth out but he wasn’t sure if Jack realized it or not. Did he know that Vernon wasn’t pretending? 

Officer Lapin is quiet as he stares at them. He collects the papers they had given them on his desk into a neat pile and he sighs. 

“I think I have enough for now,” Officer Lapin says, “I’ll read these over and contact you if I have any questions. You’ll hear from us soon for your next meeting session.” 

Vernon and Jack nod and stand alongside Mr. Stevens and Officer Lapin. Officer Lapin leads them out of the office and back through the hallway, back to the door they had come in. Back in the main room Mr. Stevens looks at them and sighs. 

“Well, we can relax. You two made it through the first interview. You did pretty decent if not giving away a little _too_ much information,” Mr. Stevens says, “but I’ll be in contact when they want to set up the next interview.” 

Vernon and Jack nod and Mr. Stevens shakes their hands before he nods at them and heads toward the exit, off to his next appointment. 

That leaves Jack and Vernon alone in the room – well, mostly alone besides the people waiting in the row of seats as Jack and Vernon had just done, and the workers behind the desks – their eyes meet and Vernon isn’t sure what to say. The information he gave during the interview was the truth, was everything he was working so hard to hide, was what he was scared of, and he gave it up like it was nothing, and now Jack knows. 

“Vernon?” Jack says, his eyes big and careful as he watches Vernon’s face. 

Vernon can feel himself begin to shake, his insides trembling. This is it. The moment the shit hits the fan and he can’t stop it, “Yeah?” he asks, his voice barely a whisper. 

“I…I just want to make sure you’re okay,” Jack says, “It seems like it took a lot out of you.” 

Vernon is relieved but there’s a wash of disappointment in his belly. Maybe Jack didn’t get it after all? Maybe Jack thought he was just a damn good actor.

“I’m okay,” Vernon confirms, feeling oddly numb, “Are you?” 

Jack nods, a small smile gracing his lips, “I’m okay.” 

Vernon steps close to Jack, close enough that their hands could brush if only Vernon reached out towards him. Vernon is taller than Jack and Jack has to look up to meet his eyes. 

“I want you to come home,” Vernon says, softly, just for Jack, “I miss you.” He’s being oddly candid today, leaving everything on the table, giving it all to Jack. He’s tired, emotionally, physically, tired of pretending, tired of all of it. 

“You do?” Jack asks, his own voice barely a whisper, a warm brush of air against Vernon’s face.

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “just come home, Jack.” 

Jack smiles and his eyes look damp, like he’s going to cry next. Vernon huffs out a laugh. 

“Don’t cry or I’m going to get going again.” 

Jack laughs wetly, “Okay,” he says, “I won’t. I’ll get my stuff from Kevin’s and…I’ll meet you at the apartment?” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “I’ll see you there.” 

They step apart, sinking into the present, into the world around them. Vernon walks Jack out to his car. There’s a silence between them, but it’s comfortable, not awkward, not like what Vernon was used to. Jack slips into the driver’s side of his car and waves to Vernon as he starts it. Vernon nods back at him and then walks the next few rows down to his own car. 

Now that he’s alone and out of the meeting, out of Jack’s space, the nerves kick in again. He had told Jack about his feelings but it was in a vague sort of way, where maybe Jack still didn’t understand. Whatever happens next, from here on out, Vernon knows it can’t happen unless he tells Jack the truth, unless he tells him how he feels. That’s the only way they can move on, the only way they can get better. 

Vernon leaves the Immigration Office and doesn’t go right home. He stops by the grocery store first, picking up some things for dinner, hoping maybe he and Jack can cook together like they’d done in the past. Without Jack in the apartment Vernon’s been letting a lot of shit slip, falling back into the comfort of his old routines. 

As Vernon’s setting his groceries on the conveyor belt his phone dings signaling a text message. Vernon digs his phone out of his pocket and unlocks it, seeing a message from Arin: 

_‘The lawyer called and said everything went well?’_

‘It went pretty well. At least well enough that we didn’t end up arrested or some shit.’

_‘Good, one step closer to keeping our Jack here permanently.’_

Vernon smiles at his phone as he slides it into his pocket and gets out his credit card to pay for his groceries. Arin’s optimism was helping Vernon feel more positive about it all. Maybe they could really do this. Maybe they could really pull this off and keep Jack here and it would all be okay. It was what they were working towards, what Vernon wanted more than anything. If something went wrong now…if Jack got sent home for years or…for _good_ …Vernon wasn’t sure he could handle it. 

He pays for his groceries and carries the plastic sacks out to his car, settling them into the backseat before he gets into the car and heads back to the apartment. He wonders if Jack beat him there, hoping that Jack kept his key so he wasn’t stuck waiting on Vernon to let him in. 

The ride back to the apartment feels short and when Vernon pulls into the parking lot he can see Jack’s car already parked a few spaces down. He smiles, relieved that Jack came home so soon. Vernon digs into the backseat and grabs their groceries, carrying them as he heads through the front door and takes the stairs up to their apartment. 

Once he reaches their door Vernon realizes he doesn’t have a free hand to grab his keys that are tucked into the pocket of his pants. He jostles the groceries around, trying to free his keys, feeling aggravated at himself for not getting them out ahead of time. Then the door is being tugged open before Vernon can even get his keys out and Jack is there. 

“I thought I heard something,” Jack says. 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “Forgot to get my keys out ahead of time.” He makes to slip past Jack and head into the apartment, but Jack stops him. 

“Here, lemme help,” he says as he leans forward and takes a couple bags from Vernon, “What did you buy?” 

“Some stuff for dinner…I was kinda running low, I guess?” he nudges the door closed behind him with his elbow as he heads towards the kitchen, Jack following after him. Vernon sets the bags on the counter and Jack does the same. 

Then the two of them are in the small space of the kitchen and Vernon is giddy and nervous all at once. It just feels right to have Jack back here, to have him home. There’s so much to say that Vernon isn’t sure where to begin. All of his words want to leave him in a jumble, a rattling list of everything he should have said to Jack a long time ago. 

Michael pads into the kitchen, swirling first around Jack’s ankles and then around Vernon’s. 

“Mike missed you too,” Vernon says, trying to let his busy brain calm down. 

“And I missed her,” Jack says, bending down to scoop Michael up in his arms, cradling her like a baby, holding her in a way that she never lets Vernon hold her, “My special little lass,” Jack coos at the cat, booping Michael on the nose. 

“She’s probably really happy you’re back,” Vernon says, taking the groceries out of their bags, “I know I am.” 

Jack sets Michael back on the ground. “It feels good to be back. I missed you.” 

Vernon’s face is warm and he can’t help the smile that takes over. He turns and puts some cereal in one of the cupboards, but he can feel Jack’s gaze linger on him. He’s glad Jack missed this too, missed being here, it made Vernon feel like maybe it wasn’t so bad that he missed Jack so much. 

“I was hoping,” Jack says, and Vernon glances at him, watches him fiddle with a can of corn on the counter before his eyes flick up and find Vernon, “That we could talk about what you said earlier? At the interview?” 

Vernon’s heart flutters in his chest, his tongue swiping over his dry lips. It’s now. Now or never. Vernon nods, “Sure, what…what about it?” 

“I know you have a lot of talents and maybe acting is one of them but…when you were telling the officer about how you felt, about what ya like about me…Vernon, it didn’t feel like acting.”

Jack’s tone is neutral, unreadable and Vernon’s stomach flops around. He closes the cupboard overhead and faces Jack, his hand bracing against the counter, fingers drumming against the Formica surface. 

“I’m scared,” Vernon breathes. He’s pressed on the brink of a cliff, toeing the edge, the precipice of life and death. He can’t go forward, he can’t go backwards, all he can do is hang on to this moment while fear eats him alive. 

Jack is right there in front of him. His eyes are soft and he’s watching Vernon intently, quietly. Vernon focuses on the gentle look on his face. No matter what happens. He wants to remember it all this way. 

“Why are you scared?” Jack’s tone is a whisper, a breath just like before. Vernon doesn’t know how it’s so easy for them to fall into these moments, where it feels like it’s their own little world and they are the only ones in it. 

“I’m scared you’ll hate me. I’m scared you’ll leave. I’m scared to ruin one of the best things that’s ever happened to me.” 

“Vernon,” Jack says, stepping closer, close enough that Vernon can smell the familiar scent of him, how it makes him tingle, makes him feel warm. Jack’s looking up at him, his face tilted as his eyes scan Vernon’s face, “You’re my best friend in the world. I don’t think anything you say could make me hate you.” 

Vernon’s eyes flutter closed, his mouth tugging down in a frown. He’s too aware of his body shaking, of how damn nervous he is. Then Vernon can feel a warm touch on his cheek and his eyes fly open to see Jack’s hand there, cupping his face, Jack’s light eyes making it so easy for Vernon to lose himself in them. 

“Vernon, just talk to me.” 

Vernon’s own hand goes to Jack’s wrist, holding loosely, connecting them like a current; Jack touching Vernon and Vernon holding on to him. It helps settle him. He takes a breath and with Jack right there he takes that last step off the ledge, falling into whatever happens next. 

“I wasn’t pretending. Everything I said…I meant. I think…I’m in love with you, Jack.” 

Jack is quiet and Vernon is too aware of his heart beating in his chest, each second feeling longer than the last as he waits for Jack to say something, to say _anything_ in response. 

“It’s okay,” Jack says in that same soft tone. 

Slowly, Vernon can feel his heart begin to break. 

“It’s not okay,” Vernon says, his fingers shaking as he holds Jack’s wrist, feeling the warmth of his skin as he holds on for dear life. 

“Why isn’t it okay?” Jack asks. 

“Because you don’t feel the same way, because you’re going to hate me, you’re going to leave, and when this is all over you’re going to settle down with someone you really love, someone you want to marry for real.” 

Vernon’s eyes sting but he refuses to let himself cry again. This was his own fault. He should have been more careful with his heart. He should have remembered it all was all pretend. This wasn’t Jack’s fault. 

“I don’t blame you,” Vernon adds, “I don’t blame you for any of it.”

“Vernon,” Jack says, and then his hand is gone and Vernon feels cold. He wants the floor to open under him and swallow him up, take him somewhere that isn’t here, isn’t now, teleport him to some universe where Jack loves Vernon back.

“I’m sorry,” Vernon breathes, he’s trembling and he feels so stupid, “I’m sorry, Jack.” 

“Our sushi lunch together,” Jack says. 

Vernon blinks, lost to what Jack is saying, “What?” 

“When I ordered us sushi and we ate it at the office, just the two of us, like you told Officer Lapin about?” Jack says, like it should all make sense to Vernon. 

“What about it?” God if he was being rejected he just wanted to get it over with. 

“It was the first time I felt that weird tug in my stomach, the same one that told me I wanted to get to know you better. It was the first time I realized that maybe I liked you a little more than I should.” 

Vernon is silent as he watches Jack, listens to him. His heart is so fast in his chest and he can barely breathe. What was Jack saying? 

“I was scared too,” Jack continues, “Scared to say yes to all of this, to pretending to marry you because…I like you, Vernon. I didn’t think it was a great idea to marry the guy I had a crush on, but I thought I could keep my shit together…don’t know how well I did.” He looks up at Vernon, eyes sparkling. 

“A crush?” Vernon asks, dumbfounded. Jack had a crush on him? Has a crush on him? It didn’t make any sense. Jack, who was so handsome, so cool, so charming. He had a secret crush on _Vernon_? Vernon who was a ball of anxiety wound tightly around a mess of sexual kinks and creativity, whose only long-term relationship in the past three years has been his cat? Jack has a crush on _him_? 

Jack’s hands rest warm on Vernon’s shoulders, holding loosely, gently, leaving Vernon room to wiggle away if he wanted, if he wasn’t comfortable. Vernon can hardly think, hardly _breathe_. 

“So, I wanna ask you. Who said I don’t love you?” Jack asks, “Because, Vernon, I do. I really do.” 

Vernon’s mind is blank but he reaches out and he cups Jack’s cheek, letting his thumb brush the soft skin just before the dark wash of stubble begins. Jack leans into the touch, looking like Michael trying to nuzzle against him for more attention. Jack hums soft and quiet and he smiles up at Vernon. 

Vernon is moving on autopilot, already free-falling into whatever this is, whatever is forming around them, like a shell, an energy between them. He dips his head and he can see when Jack leans up, when Jack presses on his toes to meet Vernon half-way. 

Then they’re kissing for the second time in their lives. Their mouths meeting in a soft brush, a heat burning through Vernon’s entire body, sparks dancing down his spine. Jack’s fingers dig into the fabric of Vernon’s dress shirt, holding on as their mouths press together in soft kisses. Vernon’s dizzy with it all. This doesn’t feel like their first kiss at the wedding, this is different, but so much better. 

One of Vernon’s hands drifts to Jack’s waist, his hand open against the thin dress shirt and he can feel the warmth of Jack’s skin against his palm. Jack lets out a low moan, Vernon capturing the noises with his lips. The heat inside him spikes and he holds Jack a little tighter than before. 

Jack must be feeling that same energy, that same buzz of arousal, because then he’s pushing Vernon backwards, guiding him until Vernon’s back is hitting the counter and Jack is pressing against him. He feels Jack’s tongue brush his bottom lip the same time their hips meet. Now it’s Vernon’s moaning open and loud as he parts his lips for Jack, as he lets Jack press his tongue into Vernon’s mouth. 

They’ve never kissed like this and all Vernon can do is cling to Jack as their mouths meet, the momentum building between them, the air growing frantic, seeping into their movements. Jack is rubbing against Vernon’s thigh and he can feel the bulge of Jack’s dick. It reminds him of when he woke up feeling Jack hard against him, how hot it was, how ashamed he felt at how much he wanted Jack in that moment. 

“Fuck,” Vernon says breathlessly as they break their kiss. Jack isn’t done with him, listening to Vernon pant as he presses a kiss to Vernon’s neck, earning a sweet gasp from Vernon when Jack’s teeth nip at the tender skin there. 

“You’re so hot,” Jack breathes against Vernon’s shoulder, biting him there too, teeth pressing in against the fabric of Vernon’s shirt, “You make me crazy.” 

“Jack, sh-shit,” Vernon says, pressing his leg against the hardness of Jack’s dick and hearing Jack groan low in his throat, the sound beautiful, something Vernon wants to hear now and forever, wants to feel pressed into his skin. 

“Should we go to the bedroom?” Jack asks, pulling back to look into Vernon’s face, his eyes are burning as he stares Vernon down, his tongue sliding over his red lips, the hunger so apparent on his face. 

Vernon nods, “God, yes.” 

Jack’s hands cup Vernon’s face and pull Vernon closer so they can kiss again. He guides Vernon, trying to get them to move without breaking their heated kiss. Vernon can hardly think let alone get his body to cooperate with him when he’s so turned on, when all he can focus on is the heat from Jack’s mouth, how they’re kissing, how much he likes it. 

Jack leads them through the hallway and to their bedroom, keeps Vernon moving until the backs of Vernon’s knees hit the edge of the bed and then Jack is using his hands on Vernon’s shoulders to press him down into a sitting position. Like this, Vernon is level with Jack’s crotch and he can see the thick outline of Jack’s hard dick through his pants. Vernon licks his lips and touches Jack’s hips. 

He wants so much, wants everything. He can’t even remember the last time he was so turned on, the last time he was this excited. Jack pushes at something inside of him, hits all his buttons at once. Vernon’s hands creep along the length of Jack’s belt, fingers trailing inwards to the front of his pants where he begins to undo the belt, sliding it off, Jack’s eyes so hot on him from above. 

“You look damn hot like that,” Jack says, his voice deep and delicious and his accent thicker than ever with his arousal. Jack’s hand threads into his hair, his nimble fingers carding through the strands easily, making Vernon’s eyes flutter as he lets out a soft moan, “You’re unbelievable.” 

Jack’s belt is off and Vernon drops it to the floor, going for Jack’s pants next and undoing the button and then tugging down the zipper. 

“You want me to blow you?” Vernon asks, sliding a hand into Jack’s pants, feeling the hardness of his dick through his boxers. God, yes, it was the feeling he remembered from before. Vernon rubs at Jack the best he can with the angle and the way Jack’s still mostly wearing his pants. He hears Jack moan and watches his head tip back. 

“You would?” Jack asks. 

Vernon licks his lips. He never has before, but he can’t deny that he’s thought about it. A cute guy meeting his eye in the bar and Vernon’s had thoughts about following him to the bathroom, dropping to his knees, and sucking the guy off right then and there, the voyeuristic side of himself delighted at the notion of public sex, of being used. That wasn’t quite like this, but the urge is high inside of Vernon. He wants to taste Jack, wants to make Jack feel good. 

“I can’t promise I’ll be the best you ever had, but I want to do this,” Vernon says, holding off on tugging down Jack’s pants until he has an answer from the other man. 

“Fuck, Vern, of course I want you to,” Jack says, petting his hand through Vernon’s hair again, “I bet you’ll look real fucking cute with my dick in your mouth.” 

Vernon moans and he tugs Jack’s dress pants down to his knees. That leaves Jack in his boxers and Vernon can’t help but lean forward, his hands on Jack’s hips as he licks a stripe up the fabric covered length of Jack’s dick. Jack hisses, his fingers tightening in Vernon’s hair before stroking smoothly again. 

Vernon licks at Jack’s dick again, letting the flat of his tongue press against Jack’s cock through his boxer-briefs. He can taste the salt of Jack’s skin, the bitter tang of pre-come. He can smell Jack earthy and human and turned on, and it makes his stomach roll with need. 

“You like to tease, huh?” Jack asks. 

Vernon smiles, “A little.” And he nuzzles against the front of Jack’s crotch, letting his tongue trail across the fabric. He finds the head of Jack’s cock pressing against the boxers, straining a little with need, and Vernon can’t help but close his mouth around the head, sucking lightly through Jack’s clothes. Jack moans and his fingers go tight in Vernon’s hair again. 

“F-Fuck,” Jack hisses. 

It feels so good, powerful in a way, to know that he’s the one making Jack feel good. That he’s the one getting Jack off this way. It’s amazing, better than Vernon could have ever asked for. He can’t hold back anymore, can’t bring himself to tease Jack because he’s hungry for it himself. He wants to taste Jack for real, wants to know what Jack feels like in his mouth. 

Vernon dips his thumbs under the waistband of Jack’s boxer-briefs and drags them down to his knees to join his pants. Jack’s cock is there in front of him, bare, heavy, and hard. He isn’t giant, not like dicks Vernon’s seen in porn, but he’s sizeable, bigger than Vernon’s own cock, a little thicker too. He’s also uncut, which Vernon has very little experience with dicks beyond his own and he doesn’t want to hurt Jack. 

Vernon sinks to his knees in front of Jack, his cock right in Vernon’s face. He spits into the palm of his hand and reaches out to touch Jack, closing his fingers around Jack’s shaft. He feels Jack twitch in the palm of his hand and the feeling is intoxicating. He strokes Jack from base to tip, watching the way Jack’s face changes, how he has to force his eyes to stay open as he focuses on Vernon. 

Vernon touches Jack the same way he’d touch himself, slow, almost lazy strokes just to get warmed up. Vernon teases himself a lot when he gets off, edges himself, works himself up slow and steady and backs off when he gets too heated. He doesn’t want to spring any of that on Jack, but for now it’s good, working up the pace. Vernon leans in and presses the flat of his tongue to the head of Jack’s dick, feeling the thick skin there and hearing Jack moan. 

The sounds serve as good encouragement and Vernon licks around the foreskin of Jack’s cock, tasting the tang of his skin; it’s different but not bad, the scent heady, making Vernon dizzy with arousal. Jack’s other hand touches Vernon’s face, his thumb dipping into the crevice of Vernon’s cheek. Vernon slides his tongue down the underside of Jack’s cock, trailing a thick vein, trying to remember every blowjob he’s ever had and what he liked when a girl was doing this to him. 

Jack’s dick twitches under Vernon’s tongue and he can feel when Jack shudders above him. Jack is so responsive it only pushes Vernon to do more, to earn more from him. Vernon opens his mouth and takes a deep breath before taking the head of Jack’s cock in his mouth. 

Jack’s dick is a heavy weight against his tongue, smooth and warm and Vernon sucks lightly. Jack gasps and he uses Vernon’s shoulder to steady himself. 

“Sh-Shit…for never doing this before you’re pretty good at it,” Jack pants. 

Vernon hums around Jack’s cock, feeling bold. He opens his mouth a little wider and takes more of Jack into his mouth, being careful with his teeth and pressing his tongue up against the underside. Jack is so warm and thick in his mouth, the feeling making Vernon’s head spin. 

“God, I was right about you,” Jack says, “I knew you’d look good with a mouth full of dick.” 

Vernon moans around Jack’s cock and Jack groans. One of his hands finds the back of Vernon’s neck, holding lightly, his fingers firm and warm. Vernon’s never sucked dick before but this is a feeling he could get used to. His mouth feels full of Jack and he’s getting so many reactions from the man above him. Knowing that he’s doing that to Jack, that he’s the one getting him off, it makes Vernon’s insides hot, makes his dick throb where it’s trapped in Vernon’s dress pants. 

Vernon pulls back to take a breath, letting his mouth fall open, thick strings of spit connecting his lips to Jack’s cock. Vernon spits on Jack’s dick, stroking him with his hand, wetting the length. Jack shivers at the touch, his eyes fluttering, his head dropping back and if Vernon thought Jack was beautiful before it’s absolutely nothing compared to the way Jack looks when he’s turned on, when he’s getting off; like this Jack looks like a work of art, a masterpiece, something that Vernon is damn lucky to be seeing. 

Jack focuses in on Vernon, their eyes meeting as Vernon strokes Jack and watches Jack moan. 

“S-Sometimes I see things in scenes…like composition,” Jack starts, his voice so deep and low, so enticing, “An-And right now you’re gorgeous like this, Vernon, looking up at me so pretty while you touch my dick. Fuck. You’re beautiful.” 

Vernon’s face flushes but the words are nice, encouraging, even if he has a hard time believing them. Vernon leans back in and takes Jack into his mouth again, letting his hand squeeze gently around the base. Jack gasps and Vernon can taste the bitter tang from the pre-come against his tongue. With the way he had slicked up Jack’s length with his spit the slide is easier and Vernon finds himself taking more of Jack than ever before. 

He doesn’t let up until he feels the head of Jack’s cock brush the back of his throat. Vernon pauses, breathing deeply through his nose, his tongue pressing against Jack’s dick, his hand drifting a little lower to roll Jack’s balls in his palm, careful and easy, and Jack groans loud and rich, the noise setting fire to Vernon. He’s sure he could live off of Jack’s sounds, off of his reactions, he’d be content to get Jack off forever if he could always see and hear him in this way. 

Vernon sets an easy pace and pulls back up to the tip before he begins to bob his head, trying for a smooth rhythm, listening to the wet sounds his mouth around Jack is making, how lewd it is, but how unbelievably hot it is at the same time. Jack rolls his hips, just barely, unconsciously almost as he meets Vernon’s mouth, making Jack’s cock slide against Vernon’s tongue. 

Vernon moans. Every fantasy he’s ever had fires to life inside of his brain. He pictures himself on his knees with Jack holding his head, Jack’s warm hands cupping his cheeks as he fucks Vernon’s face. He knows that can’t happen right now, Vernon isn’t ready for it, but God, he wants it, deep down he’d let Jack use him as much as he wanted. 

Vernon presses down again and he keeps going, inspired by his own fantasies. He can feel Jack’s cock brushing his throat but he doesn’t pull back like before, he keeps going and the wide head of Jack’s dick presses insistently against the resistance before he’s sliding through and Vernon moans as best he can with Jack’s dick in his throat. 

“Holy _shit_ ,” Jack breathes, “Vernon, _fuck_.”

As much as Vernon loves the feeling, loves the reaction he’s getting from Jack, and the way he can feel Jack’s dick twitching with pleasure in his _throat_ , Vernon can’t stay like that, his gag reflex fighting him. He pulls back and off Jack’s cock, coughing a little with the urge to breath. Jack’s hand finds his hair, petting it softly, comfortingly as he had before. 

“Are you alright?” Jack asks, his voice so kind even while turned on. 

Vernon nods, “I’m okay, just a little more than I thought.” 

“Don’t push yourself on my account,” Jack says, “You’re doing amazing.” 

Vernon wipes at his mouth and lets his tongue drag along the side of Jack’s cock as he mouths at the length in front of him, “I know,” Vernon says, “But I like tasting you.” 

“Jesus, you’re a bit filthy aren’t ya?” Jack says, sounding almost in awe of Vernon, of what he’s doing. 

Vernon feels his insides glow with pride. He moves back to the head of Jack’s dick, taking just the tip in his mouth he sucks at Jack, stroking the rest of his cock. He watches Jack tremble before him, he listens to Jack groan and grunt, feels Jack pulsing against his tongue. 

“V-Vernon, you’re gettin’ me close. You’re gonna make me come.” 

Vernon moans and opens his mouth to take more of Jack in, bobbing his head faster than before, enthralled by the promise of getting to taste Jack’s come. 

“Jesus,” Jack mutters, “F-Fuck.” His hips rock forward to meet Vernon’s pace, pushing himself a little further into Vernon’s mouth, but controlled enough to not choke him. Vernon’s knees are aching, but he keeps going, sucking at Jack, letting Jack fuck into his mouth slow and easy, his hand stroking what he can’t fit inside. He wants to make Jack come. He wants to know that he’s the one that did it, that he’s the one that got him off. He wants to taste Jack in every single way. 

Jack’s panting, his composure unraveling and Vernon flicks his eyes upwards to meet Jack’s gaze, to watch how he’s struggling to keep his eyes opened with the way he’s moaning and panting, how he’s shaking apart right in front of Vernon. 

“Fuck, Vernon, I’m gonna…I’m about to…” 

Vernon hollows his cheeks, sucks a little harder, and then Jack groans, his head falling back as he comes in Vernon’s mouth. Vernon feels the rush of warmth, the salty bitterness that doesn’t taste great, but the process is making it enjoyable. He’s got Jack’s _come_ in his mouth and he swallows, eager and greedy, sucking Jack through it, wanting as much as he can get from him.

“O-Okay,” Jack says, tapping Vernon on the shoulder and Vernon relents and pulls back, letting Jack’s softening cock slip from his mouth. It’s shiny and wet from Vernon’s spit and Vernon’s more turned on than he’s ever been in his life. “God,” Jack says, offering Vernon a hand, “C’mere.” 

Vernon takes Jack’s hand and lets Jack pull him to his feet. The second that Vernon’s standing upright, Jack leans in and crashes their mouths together, his tongue sliding between Vernon’s lips, catching the taste of himself against Vernon’s tongue. Vernon moans, pressing himself against Jack’s body, rubbing his clothed cock against Jack’s bare hip. 

Jack moans into their kiss and then pulls back, pressing a kiss to Vernon’s jaw. 

“Are you going to let me take care of you?” Jack breathes against Vernon’s skin. 

“Fuck,” Vernon says, “Fuck, yes, Jack.” 

“Good,” Jack says, pressing a kiss to Vernon’s lips as his hands snake between their bodies and work off Vernon’s belt. Jack keeps kissing Vernon even as he undoes the button and tugs down the zipper of his pants, easing them down along with his underwear. 

Vernon kicks off his pants and boxer-briefs and Jack mimics the motion. Jack isn’t stopping at just the pants, his nimble and clever fingers go to the buttons on Vernon’s shirt and begin undoing them, letting his hands press against the warmth of Vernon’s belly, sliding upwards to remove the shirt from Vernon’s skin.

Vernon has to pull it off the rest of the way, gasping as Jack peppers kisses down his chest, nipping at the soft skin there. Jack’s hands find Vernon’s hips and he guides Vernon backwards towards the bed. Vernon takes the cue and lies down on the bed, completely naked, completely vulnerable for Jack. 

Jack sheds his own shirt faster than anyone Vernon’s ever seen before. Then Jack’s standing over him, slender, pale body, his dark hair and heated eyes, he drinks Vernon in, his pink tongue snaking out to wet his lips. If Vernon was asked what he was expecting to happen he’d say that he was expecting Jack to go down on him, to blow him like Vernon had done, but as he stares at Jack he realizes he kind of has no idea what Jack has planned, and the thought excites him. 

Jack crawls on to the bed alongside Vernon, the mattress dipping under Jack’s weight as he knee-walks over to him. Jack leans over Vernon and then presses a gentle kiss to his mouth, one where Vernon can feel his smile. He touches Vernon’s face as their kiss breaks.

“Would it be okay if I ate you out?” Jack asks. 

All the air leaves Vernon’s lungs in a gasp, “W-what?” 

Jack grins, “I’ve been told I’m pretty good at it.” 

“Are…” Vernon says, “Are you asking to eat my ass?” 

Jack snorts and rests his face in the crook of Vernon’s shoulder. 

“Not in so blunt of terms, but yeah? Can I?” 

Fuck. No one has _ever_ done that to Vernon before, but he likes the thought of sharing something so intimate with Jack, the idea making him warm all over, making his heart quicken in his chest. Vernon runs a hand through Jack’s hair, getting Jack to lift his head and meet his gaze. 

“You can absolutely do that.” 

Jack kisses Vernon again before he slips back down the bed, nudging Vernon’s thighs apart with his hands. He fits himself between Vernon’s spread legs. 

“Can you grab a pillow and put it under your arse?” Jack asks. 

Vernon complies, grabbing one of his pillows and tucking it under himself, propping his ass up for Jack to have easy access. His dick is throbbing between his legs, so hard, leaking thick droplets of pre-come down his shaft. He wants to touch himself but at the same time he wants to hold off, wants to make this last with Jack as long as he can. 

“Mmm,” Jack says softly as he reaches out and strokes Vernon’s cock, his touch a little too dry, but still so fucking good, “You have a nice pretty dick, Vern,” Jack says, curling his fingers around the base. Vernon props himself up on his elbows so he can see Jack better, can watch as Jack leans in and licks a wet stripe over the head of Vernon’s dick, watching it twitch in response to his touch. 

Vernon drops his head back between his shoulders, “Fuck,” he breathes. It’s been so long since someone else got him off. He didn’t want to come too fast, and Jack is so pretty, is breathtakingly gorgeous as he swirls his tongue around the head of Vernon’s dick. 

Vernon feels Jack’s tongue drag in a long line up the underside of his cock and he moans, his hips jerking. He looks back down at Jack, catches his eye just in time to see Jack closing his mouth around the head of Vernon’s dick, sucking light, his eyes twinkling. 

“Jack, God,” Vernon says, reaching down and pushing Jack’s long curtain of hair out of his face, holding it loosely in his hand, watching the way Jack hollows his cheeks, how cute he looks with his red lips stretched around Vernon’s cock. It’s maddening. 

Jack presses down and takes more of Vernon’s dick into his mouth, sucking at him, his mouth the perfect combination of heat and suction, making Vernon’s brain go fuzzy at the feeling, at how good it all is, how turned on he is by it all. 

Then Jack is pulling off Vernon’s cock, placing an oddly sweet kiss to the tip before he moves to Vernon’s left thigh, pressing a kiss there as well, biting the soft pale skin and feeling Vernon’s body twitch in response. Vernon gasps, his thighs a little sensitive and the gentle movement of Jack’s mouth has him arching into the touch, groaning at the soft little bites that Jack’s trailing across his skin. 

He watches Jack move to the right thigh, giving it the same treatment, peppering kisses and nips, and soft bites where Vernon can see Jack sinking his teeth into his skin. Vernon can’t help but reach out and stroke at his cock, rubbing his thumb over the slit. 

Jack isn’t hesitating at all, doesn’t seem shy or new to this kind of thing. Has he done it before? Vernon’s mind whirls with thoughts of Jack hooking up with guys, Jack sucking dick, Jack living out every dirty fantasy that Vernon’s thought about himself but had been too much of a pussy to ever really pursue. 

Jack’s hands reach Vernon’s ass and Vernon can feel Jack parting his cheeks. He breathes, staring up at the ceiling, his arms long since giving out on keeping him up. Then, Vernon feels the touch of Jack’s tongue against his asshole, feels Jack licking a stripe across it. Vernon moans and bucks his hips up. The sensation is amazing, so hot, a bright, burning feeling fluttering to life inside of him. 

“Holy shit,” Vernon breathes. 

He feels a kiss being pressed to his ankle and then Jack’s deep soothing voice. 

“I’ve only just started.” 

Vernon props himself up again, too desperate to watch Jack. Even the sight of Jack’s dark head nestled between his legs is hotter than it should be, the way Vernon sees him move and how it corresponds to the sweet pleasure he feels spiking through him. 

Jack’s tongue runs in a smooth circle over the ring of muscle. Vernon pants. Jack’s moving slow, steady, like he has all the time in the world to taste Vernon, tease him with featherlight touches, with the achingly slow drag of his tongue. He’s never thought much about this before, about doing it or having it done to him, but now he can’t believe he’s lived twenty-eight years of his life without experiencing this intense pleasure. 

Jack hums and Vernon can _feel_ the vibrations against his skin. He strokes himself again, squeezing at his dick to quell how excited he is, how turned on he is right now. Jack changes up and goes back to licking in broad stripes over Vernon’s hole, wetting him, and Vernon sees stars behind his eyes. His hand finds Jack’s head again and he holds on, tugging at Jack’s hair just a little and earning a sweet moan from Jack. 

Then, then Jack’s tongue does something new. Then Jack’s tongue is pressing against him and Vernon gasps, his thighs shaking as he feels that intense heat in a completely new way. 

“O-Oh, fuck,” Vernon gasps, “Jack.” 

Jack’s tongue eases _inside_ of Vernon and it feels so good that Vernon could scream. One of Jack’s hands comes up and pats at Vernon’s thigh before touching at his own shoulder. Vernon can hardly think but he still gets the meaning. He hooks his leg over Jack’s shoulder, opening himself up a little wider for Jack, making the slide that much easier. 

Jack speeds up his movements and then his tongue is fucking into Vernon. The feeling is so delicious, so hot, Vernon’s hands dig into the sheets under him and he tries his hardest not to rock against Jack’s face, to let him lead the movement. 

Vernon can feel Jack’s hair tickling his thighs, he can feel the bite of Jack’s beard as he licks into Vernon. It’s so intimate, so hot and dirty, and Vernon clenches a little around Jack’s tongue, testing the movement and hearing Jack moan, feeling the vibrations reverberate into his skin. 

He strokes himself as Jack eats him out. He’s so embarrassingly keyed up, so wrung out from the day in general, from how long it’s been since he’s been with anyone else. He can’t make this last as long as he wants, as long as he’d hope to. Jack is insistent, his tongue wet, curling inside of Vernon, making Vernon arch and whine, making him jerk himself off fast, thumbing the slit. 

“Jack,” Vernon breathes, embarrassed by how high pitched and needy he sounds right now, “Oh my God, Jack. You’re so good. This is amazing. _You’re_ amazing.” 

Jack’s hands squeeze at Vernon’s thighs and he pulls back, his lips pressing to Vernon’s entrance and then Vernon can feel him _suck_ lightly at Vernon’s hole and Vernon yelps, bucks, bites hard on his lip. The surprise of the new feeling, how intense and amazing it is, it’s enough to push Vernon over the edge. He comes hard, with a scream, tightening around nothing as he shoots his load over his own hand, stroking himself until the feeling is too much for him. 

Jack eases Vernon’s leg from his shoulder and sets it down on the bed. Vernon feels boneless, feels like Jack sucked the life out of him. He’s sated, lazy, so content right now he could fall asleep right here on the bed. Jack crawls up and then is leaning over him, hair in his face, his mouth shiny and slick, but a smile spreading across his mouth. 

“How was that?” Jack asks.

Vernon reaches up and pushes the curtain of hair out of Jack’s eyes, “Amazing.” 

“I’m glad you liked it,” Jack says, bending down and pressing a kiss to Vernon’s lips, “I’ll be right back, okay?” 

Vernon nods, even though he doesn’t really want Jack to leave right now, even if it’s just for a second. So much happened today, a whirlwind of emotions that Vernon knows, once the content feeling of post-orgasm fades, he’s not sure how he’s going to feel. 

Jack returns a moment later with a warm cloth in hand. He takes Vernon’s come-stained hand in his own and then cleans it, moving on to rub at Vernon’s thighs and belly where bits of come cling to his skin. 

“You’re a prince among men,” Vernon says, “You’re amazing, Jackie.” 

Jack smiles soft and sweet and he sets the cloth on the floor next to the bed to be dealt with later. Jack settles down against Vernon’s side, pillowing his head on Vernon’s outstretched arm. He presses a kiss to Vernon’s Scare to Care tattoo. 

The two of them are lying together in the bed. Jack hooks his leg over Vernon’s, and Vernon pets his hand down Jack’s back. He can’t believe this is happening. He can’t believe he and Jack just fooled around. Everything feels like a blur, like Vernon can’t retrace the steps he took to get to this point, even if he wanted to. They fell into the moment, into the sex, but he doesn’t regret it, and he hopes Jack doesn’t either. 

“You seem like you’re thinking a lot,” Jack whispers. 

Vernon turns his face as best he can to see Jack, “A little…I’m kind of letting it all sink in, I guess? It’s sort of wild.” 

“It’s a weird situation, isn’t it?” Jack asks, shifting a little so he’s settled on his side. Vernon mimics the movement and meets Jack in the middle, looking into his eyes. 

“What do we do now?” Vernon asks, “We both went into this knowing it was pretend…what are we now exactly?” That’s the part that scares him. The definition. They got married under the assumption that someday it would end and they would resume their normal lives, go on to find their eventual happily ever after, but, right now Vernon can’t imagine that ending with anyone else. He can’t remember what his life felt like before this, before Jack. 

“What do you want us to do?” Jack asks. 

“I don’t know,” Vernon says, “as terrifying as it all is…and as scary as it feels to admit…I know I’m falling in love with you. I know that I want to be with you.” 

Jack’s eyes go warm as he smiles at Vernon, leaning in close to catch his mouth in a kiss, his hands cupping Vernon’s face gently. 

“It is scary…I’m a little scared too, but I’ve liked you for a long time, Vernon. I like you even more now…I was scared when you told me you would marry me to keep me here. I was scared I wouldn’t be able to quell my feelings for you and that it would put you in a weird spot. I never wanted you to think that I agreed to marry you because I was hoping for anything…it wasn’t like that. I was scared I was so damn obvious that there was no way you didn’t know how I felt about you. That you’d hate me when you realized it.” 

“I don’t think I could ever hate you, Jack,” Vernon says. His fingers sweep along the narrow expanse of Jack’s back, his fingertips brushing over the knots of Jack’s spine. He watches Jack’s eyes flutter. 

“So,” Jack says, “I know we’re technically married, but…Vernon, do you want to be my boyfriend? Do you want to give this a try for real?” 

Vernon grins, his heart feeling so full that he’s sure it’s going to burst. 

“I want to, yeah. I’d love to be your boyfriend.” 

Jack laughs, warm and giddy, and Vernon’s heart soars at the sound, at how this is working out. It’s like someone lifted a giant weight off his chest. He has no reason to be afraid anymore. He and Jack aren’t pretending to be something they aren’t. They’re together and they have nothing to hide from anyone. 

Vernon slips from Jack’s grasp to bend down and grab their comforter where it’s hanging halfway off the bed. He covers them up and then eases back into Jack’s waiting arms. Jack hums and trails lazy fingers down Vernon’s sides, their eyes falling closed. It’s easy to drift off to sleep with Jack holding him, with everything feeling so much lighter around them. 

\--

“We gotta tell everyone don’t we?” Jack asks over their morning coffee. 

They had woken up about an hour ago, Vernon delighted that it was all real, it all happened, and that Jack is still his boyfriend. Jack and Vernon had showered, dressed, put all the groceries away that they had left out the night before, and started on breakfast before they were due to the office for work. 

“We don’t have to,” Vernon says, “They can just think we’re married and that can be that.” 

“I don’t feel exactly right hidin’ it from everyone,” Jack says, “I’m happy with you and I’d like them to know about it?” 

Vernon thinks about Brian and the advice he had given Vernon. He has no real reason to want to hide it from any of the others either. They were his friends, Jack’s friends, and they would want the both of them to be happy. Besides, with the fact that Jack and Vernon are already married the transition to them playing pretend to being real feels non-existent. 

“We can,” Vernon says, “But if Brian or Arin tries to buy us a ‘congrats on being gay’ cake or some shit I’m going home early.” 

“Deal,” Jack says with a laugh. 

They feed Michael breakfast and then head out to the office. The closer they get the more nervous Vernon feels. Not in a bad way, but sort of like during the wedding. He’s not quite used to letting himself be completely vulnerable to a large group at once but he has to remind himself that he isn’t alone in this. Jack is his partner, his boyfriend, and Jack is right there with him to do this. 

They get to the office and Jack doesn’t even let Vernon go to his desk before he’s got his fingers around Vernon’s wrist and he’s leading him towards Arin’s office. 

“First thing?” Vernon asks, “Can’t I drink some coffee first?” 

“After we tell Arin,” Jack says. He knocks on Arin’s office door, lacing his fingers with Vernon’s as the two of them wait for Arin to answer. Honestly, as much as Vernon loves Arin he’s also nervous to see what Arin’s reaction will be. Arin’s always been protective of Jack and when Vernon proposed the fake marriage idea Arin had joked about Vernon treating Jack well. How was he going to feel now that they were an actual couple? 

Arin’s door opens and he spots Jack and then Vernon and he smiles at them.

“Hey, what’s up?” he asks, scanning their faces and then Vernon watches as slowly, his eyes fall to where their hands are joined together. Arin arches an eyebrow before he looks back at them. 

“Can we come in?” Jack asks. 

Arin nods, “Of course, Jack.” He moves aside to let Jack and Vernon slip into the office, Arin following after them and closing the door behind them. Arin leans against his desk instead of sitting, maybe to make it more casual, which Vernon appreciates because an office setting like this – even one as fun as Arin’s – is reminding him of Officer Lapin and their Immigration interview. 

“So, what’s going on?” Arin asks, his eyes flitting down to where Jack’s hand is still laced with Vernon’s. 

“Well, we wanted to tell you first,” Jack says, glancing at Vernon before he looks back at Arin. He was clearly taking the reins on this one, which made sense. Arin is like a father-figure to Jack, more so than to anyone else in the office, so it made sense that his relationship with Arin was a little different than Vernon’s, “Vernon and I decided to be together…like officially.” 

“Oh,” Arin says, though Vernon swears he can see the gears turning in Arin’s mind, “So, you mean, like you two are actually married?” 

“Well, we’re _actually_ dating,” Vernon says, “I wouldn’t say we’re married yet.” 

“This is kind of a recent development,” Jack says, “You know.” 

Arin’s grinning huge, almost maniacal. Vernon’s seen that grin before and it’s never led to good things. Arin rushes them, pulling first Jack into a hug and then grabbing Vernon’s wrist and tugging him in too, his strong arms wrapping around Jack and Vernon as he squeezes them against his chest. 

“My boys!” Arin says and he presses a kiss to the top of Jack’s head as Jack laughs, “My son has found love!” He claps his hand against Vernon’s back, “I guess you’re my son too now, huh?” 

“Oh my God,” Vernon says, squirming in Arin’s hold. 

“We’re going to tell everyone else too,” Jack says, “It’s not a huge deal.” 

“Well, I’m happy for you two crazy kids,” Arin says, releasing them from his bear hug.

“Thanks Arin,” Jack says, patting Arin’s chest, “We’re happy too.” 

Vernon nods in agreement, feeling his face warm up. He is happy. He hasn’t been in a relationship in a while and to be in one now with Jack, it just felt right. It felt like he was right where he was supposed to be. 

“I think we’re going to tell everyone at lunch,” Jack says. 

Arin frowns, “You expect me to keep it a secret that long?” 

“It’s only a couple hours!” 

Arin sighs, “Can I tell Dan?” 

Jack laughs, “Yeah, you can tell Dan because you were probably going to anyway.” 

“Dan doesn’t count. Dan knows everything I know. It’s our thing,” Arin says. 

“Well, no one else but Dan, okay?” Vernon says. 

Arin nods and presses two fingers over his heart, “I promise.” 

He and Jack leave Arin’s office and begin their work day. It isn’t like the two of them are even that far apart. Jack’s helping Matt and Ryan carry their mail to Ryan’s car so they can take it home and film their next mail video. Vernon’s at his desk answering emails and reading reviews of _Dream Daddy_. 

Arin orders in for lunch, having food delivered to the office so that Jack doesn’t have to go and pick it up. It makes it easier for Jack to be able to tell everyone. Vernon is nervous, not because he doesn’t think anyone will be upset or that they won’t understand, it’s just big, it’s a change in the dynamic of their work place whether they mean to shift the balance or not. 

They wait until everyone is settled and eating and then Jack clears his throat, drawing the eyes of their co-workers to him. 

“Um, Vernon and I just had a quick announcement,” Jack starts. He licks his lips and Vernon can see he’s nervous too. He’s sitting next to Jack and he scoots a little closer, sliding his arm around Jack’s shoulders, hoping to comfort him a little. Jack smiles at Vernon and then looks at the group around them, “Vernon and I have decided to date for real. We’re, ah, we’re together now.” 

Suzy’s face lights up, “Ah! You guys! Really?” she asks. 

Vernon nods, “Yeah.” 

Brian smiles and he leans over where he’s sitting to pat Vernon on the shoulder. 

“I knew you could do it,” he whispers to Vernon. 

“Thanks, Bri,” Vernon says. 

Everyone in the office seems to take it well which is a relief to Vernon. They dig into their lunches, and if Jack and Vernon lean on each other, or hold hands, no one says a word, no one pays them any mind, it’s just like any other day in the office. 

\--

“Hey, guys! Thanks for popping into my stream. I know it’s kinda late, but I appreciate you stopping by,” Vernon says, glancing towards where his ipad is set-up facing his record player. He’s got his phone in his pocket and he leans over his laptop to type in the name of the song currently playing before he leans back and fishes out his phone so he can read the comments. 

There are some about the song, some making references to _Dream Daddy_ , but a heck of a lot asking about Jack. 

“Jack’s here,” Vernon says, turning around to see Jack still tucked into the corner of the couch. He smiles at Vernon, “You want him to come say hi?” 

Vernon watches the comments explode with a variety of affirmatives. 

“You’re so popular, Jack,” Vernon says. 

Ever since Jack and Vernon announced their wedding Vernon’s noticed people taking more of an interest in them now than ever before. Jack laughs but then he’s pushing up off the couch and padding over to Vernon. Jack comes up behind Vernon and wraps his arms around Vernon’s middle, pressing his face against Vernon’s back, Vernon running his hand down to where Jack’s are wrapped around him. 

“Are you going to say hi?” Vernon whispers. 

“Sure,” Jack says, “But I wanted to say hi to you first.”

Vernon’s phone buzzes in his hand. “Your audience awaits.” 

Jack slides away from Vernon and pads over to the ipad, bending in front of it and waving at the audience watching the stream. 

“Hey!” 

The chat erupts and Vernon laughs. 

“They want you to pick a song to play next,” Vernon says. 

“Oh!” Jack says, “Well, Vernon did just get me _The Book of Mormon_ soundtrack on vinyl. Which I didn’t even know was a thing.” 

Vernon leans into the shot, “He loves it.” 

Jack looks at Vernon and smiles, “I do. We could listen to _‘I Believe’_?” 

Vernon looks at the chat and sees a resounding ‘yes’ being shouted at him in text form. 

“Sounds like we have a winner,” Vernon says. Last week he had taken Jack to his favorite record shop. Jack had never been and Vernon enjoyed showing him around, holding his hand as they moved through the aisles and Jack plucked out album covers that looked interesting to him. 

Their musical tastes weren’t too similar but Jack was catching on quickly and Vernon was watching more and more musicals online with Jack. It had been a couple weeks since they started dating for real and the transition from friendship to pretend dating, to real dating wasn’t as hard as Vernon had thought. It felt natural, it felt right, it felt like before but without any guilt involved. 

Vernon bends down near the new records he had yet to put in his collection and grabs out the one that he had gotten for Jack. They’d listened to it once already, blaring it as they cooked dinner, Jack singing along at the top of his lungs and making Vernon laugh. 

He waits for the current song to end before he switches the record over, Jack holding his phone and manning the comment section, talking to the audience watching the stream. 

“You all want to see, Mike? I’m not sure where she is. She’s a sleepy girl.” 

“The sleepiest,” Vernon chimes in, setting the needle carefully down against the record before shutting the top. 

“That’s our girl,” Jack says fondly and Vernon laughs. 

The song starts playing from the record player and Vernon goes to stand next to Jack. He rests his head on Jack’s shoulder for a second to view the screen of his phone and he watches as people go nuts about how cute they are. Vernon laughs, his face going pink. It’s still kind of weird to be so public about their relationship but he’s happy and a little part of him enjoys showing off that he’s with Jack, that it’s him that holds Jack’s heart. 

The two of them listen to Jack’s song and then two more songs before Vernon wraps up the stream, signing off to all the fans that stuck around to watch it. Jack waving at them as Vernon turns off the ipad. 

The two of the collapse on the couch together, Vernon leaning in against Jack, setting his head against Jack’s shoulder. 

“That was fun,” Jack says. 

Vernon glances up at him, “Yeah? You liked it?” 

“Of course. I remember when you used to do them before we dated. I’d see the notification pop up and I’d want to watch, sometimes I would, especially if I was back home. I’d miss you and it’d feel like hanging out with you again. Sometimes I didn’t watch because I didn’t want you to think I was weird.” 

Vernon takes Jack’s hand in his own and brings it to his mouth, kissing the soft skin. 

“You’re cute.” 

“Maybe just a little.” 

Vernon hears Jack yawn a fraction of a second later and he smiles. 

“You tired?” 

“Maybe.” 

They had both gotten up early because they had follow-up phone interviews with Officer Lapin. Well, Jack talked to Officer Lapin. Vernon’s phone interview was handled at the same time as Jack’s with a different officer and their lawyer patched into the calls. 

The questions were a little more intrusive this time around. The woman interviewing Vernon asked him to recite Jack’s personal morning routine, what he liked to eat, how he slept at night, stuff the Immigration office deemed important for Vernon to know. Lucky for the both of them he did know, and he answered much more smoothly this time around, maybe more confident because he knew this time there was no lying. 

The immigration process was moving along even though it felt like they weren’t making much progress. Mr. Stevens liked to say that as long as Jack was still in the country it was working, it was considered a success, and Vernon held on to that a lot. The goal was keeping Jack here. He felt that now more than ever before. 

“Let’s go to bed,” Vernon says, standing and offering Jack his hand, pulling him up off the couch. 

Jack laces their fingers together, squeezing lightly at Vernon’s hand as they head towards the bedroom, Vernon flicking off the light along the way. Once they get to their room Jack releases Vernon’s hands and shucks out of his jeans, tugging off his t-shirt and leaving himself in just his boxers, looking small and cute as he yawns loudly, covering his mouth with his hand. 

Vernon does the same, shucking off his clothes until he’s down to just his boxers and he and Jack crawl into bed together. They settle into their usual positions of Vernon on his side and Jack behind him, his arms looping around Vernon’s middle, holding him close as he presses soft kisses between Vernon’s shoulders. Vernon sighs and presses back against Jack, wedging their bodies that much closer. 

He used to be so caught up in the fact that he was single, convincing himself that he didn’t need anyone, wasn’t built for things to last, but now Vernon is embracing his relationship with Jack, relishing in Jack’s touch, in their time together. He enjoys it unabashedly, without guilt, letting himself fall deeper and deeper in love with Jack. It’s scary but exhilarating all at once. 

“Love you,” Jack says, his breath tickling warm and gentle against Vernon’s bare back. 

Vernon’s body tingles and he smiles huge and dumb into his pillow. 

“I love you too,” Vernon mumbles, not quite used to saying it yet even though he absolutely feels it. 

They lay together in the dim darkness of their bedroom and a few moments later they feel a weight on the bed, a soft meowing in the dark as Michael finds them. She settles in the small space between their feet, a warm purring lump on the blankets. Right now, Vernon’s content, never falling asleep any better than he does with Jack and Mike in his bed. 

\--

Vernon wakes up with Jack half-way on top of him. He shifts under the warm weight of Jack’s body, Jack’s arm draped across Vernon’s chest. Jack is a cuddler by nature and it’s surprising to Vernon that he and Jack didn’t always end up snuggling when they shared the bed before they were dating. It feels like most of the time he wakes up to Jack hanging off of him. He doesn’t mind, never does, it feels nice to have Jack there so warm and solid against him. 

Vernon rubs his hand over Jack’s lower back, fingertips brushing the waistband over his boxers. Jack makes a soft noise in his sleep and rubs his face against Vernon’s chest, his bread prickling against Vernon’s skin. As much as Vernon likes laying here, now that he’s awake he really has to take a piss, his bladder insisting that he get the hell up right now. 

Vernon loops his arms around Jack and tries to slide him over without waking him up. It sorta works. Jack is a dead weight when he’s asleep and Vernon jostles him a bit, Jack whining. 

“I’m sorry, I gotta go to the bathroom,” Vernon whispers as Jack presses his face into his pillow. He pads bleary-eyed to the bathroom, pissing and washing his hands before he heads back to the warm comfort of the bed. 

It’s a welcomed sight to see Jack lying there. His pale body is stretched out against the mattress as he lies on his stomach, his dark hair messy from sleep. Vernon carefully settles himself down on the bed, hoping he’s not disturbing Jack too much as he lies down again. 

He lies there a few quiet moments before he hears Jack make a soft sleepy noise. 

“I’m up, you know,” Jack says, turning on his side, his voice groggy as he blinks at Vernon. 

“Sorry,” Vernon says, “I didn’t mean to wake you.” 

“It’s okay,” Jack says, yawning, pushing the hair out of his face, “Good morning.” 

“Morning,” Vernon says with a smile. He rolls over to get closer to Jack, giving him a chaste kiss. It’s early and neither of them have brushed their teeth, but Jack still hums into the kiss. 

Vernon pulls back and settles down on the bed, wondering if Jack’s wanting to go back to sleep. It’s Saturday and they don’t have to go to the office or do anything important, they can sleep in if they want to. 

Jack wiggles over to Vernon, kissing Vernon’s shoulder and then letting his lips trail upwards, peppering kisses across Vernon’s skin, on his neck, his jaw, before Vernon laughs, turning to look at Jack and Jack leans in to catch his mouth again. 

“I wasn’t done with you yet,” Jack mumbles against Vernon’s lips. 

“Oh?” Vernon says. 

Then, in one fluid movement Jack is sitting up and pulling himself across Vernon’s lap so he’s straddling Vernon, his hands finding the expanse of Vernon’s chest to brace himself. This was new and Vernon licks his lips as he stares up at Jack, his hands finding Jack’s hips. 

“You’ve got my interest,” Vernon says. Jack is a warm and pleasant weight against his crotch, his dick buzzing with interest in whatever Jack’s doing. 

Jack leans down so they are pressed chest-to-chest and he kisses Vernon again, his tongue snaking out to slide into Vernon’s mouth as they kiss. Vernon’s hands creep across Jack’s back, fingers trailing over the knobs of his spine. 

Jack’s hips shift against Vernon’s, rolling in small waves, the backs of his thighs barely brushing the outline of Vernon’s dick. Vernon hums into their kiss. He’s getting hard and normally he’d be embarrassed, but he doesn’t think Jack will mind. 

Their kiss breaks and then Jack blinks down at him with heavy, warm, sparkling eyes. 

“I was thinking,” Jack starts, his voice and accent thicker than usual, a clear sign he’s turned on, “That you could fuck me.” 

“Shit,” Vernon gasps, “Really?” 

Jack nods, kisses Vernon’s jaw, “Yeah, if you wanted to. If you’d be into it.”

Fuck, of course he was into it. He and Jack have fooled around since that first night they got together. They’ve exchanged handjobs, blowjobs, Jack’s pressed Vernon’s knees to his chest and then eaten him out like there was no tomorrow, but they’ve yet to fuck. The thought makes Vernon tingle all over, it also makes him rock hard. He doesn’t have a lot of experience, but he’s maybe been researching it in his off-time, wanting to be prepared when the subject came up. 

“Have you ever?” Vernon asks, trying to find his words, find how to ask without sounding like a complete idiot. 

“Yeah,” Jack says, “Once or twice.” 

It was a little surprising, but not by too much. Vernon pictures Jack getting fucked, random unidentified men filling his imagination, spreading Jack’s thighs and filling him up. Vernon bites back a moan at the thought. He didn’t need to imagine it. He was going to get to be with Jack in that way. Jack wants it and fuck, so does Vernon. 

“Do you have lube?” Vernon asks, he may not know a ton about how this all works but he knows that lube is a must-have. 

Jack smiles and rolls off of Vernon for a moment, leaning off the bed to open the nightstand draw, digging around inside before he returns with a clear bottle of lube. 

“Picked some up the other night.” 

“Have you been planning this?” Vernon asks. 

Jack shrugs, “Tryin’ to think of the right time to bring it up. I didn’t plan it to be this morning, but…” 

“But?” Vernon asks.

He watches Jack’s face go red, “But I really want you to fuck me.” 

“Fuck,” Vernon says, rubbing a hand over his crotch, feeling his dick throb under his touch. Jack hands off the lube to Vernon and then Vernon is watching as Jack hooks his thumbs into the waistband of his boxer-briefs and slides them down, revealing his pale thighs, his hard dick jutting to life as it’s freed from the fabric. 

Vernon licks his lip, distracted by Jack’s dick. 

“I guess I won’t have to worry about you not touchin’ me while we fuck, huh?” Jack teases. 

“God, you know I love getting you off,” Vernon says. 

Jack grins, warm and a little smug as he takes the lube back from Vernon. He pops the cap and Vernon sits himself up on his elbows, watching Jack squeeze the clear liquid into his palm. 

“Are you going to finger yourself?” Vernon asks. 

Jack rubs the lube between his thumb and his forefinger. “That was the plan. Why? Did you want to do it?” 

Vernon swallows, nerves plucking in his chest. 

“I don’t know if I’d know what I was doing.” 

“You could watch me first, you know, get used to it?” Jack says. 

Vernon nods. He’s interested, but at the same time intimidated. He thought he had a handle on sex, but with Jack so much of it is new, and Vernon wants to do good, he wants to be good for Jack and get him off and not feel like he might screw up. Jack was good at calming him down, making him feel better about everything, and sex was no exception. 

He watches as Jack shifts so that his back is facing Vernon. He’s on his knees and he leans forward, planting a hand in the mattress, leaning over so that his ass is sticking out, like he’s presenting himself to Vernon. Vernon swallows, devouring the slight curves of Jack’s body. He’s pale, lovely, so damn beautiful as his nimble fingers slide between his legs, inching between his cheeks. 

Vernon watches with an open fascination, a hunger, as Jack rubs at his pink hole. He hears Jack huff, hears him groan, his head flicking back to get the hair out of his face. 

“It is-isn’t too hard,” Jack says, “All about prep. Don’t wanna rush. Wanna make it easy for you to get inside.” 

Vernon moans at that, at the reminder that he’s going to be _inside_ of Jack soon. 

Jack teases his index finger in a circle around the rim of muscle, moaning softly as he touches himself. 

“Been a long time since I’ve done this to myself,” Jack confesses, “Feels so good.” 

“Fuck,” Vernon breathes, completely in awe of Jack, of how blazingly hot the man is. His hand drifts to his dick, stroking himself through his underwear, squeezing at his cock to calm himself down. Jack makes him excited so easily it was any wonder that Vernon wasn’t coming at the drop of a hat, “Jack, you’re so beautiful.”

Jack moans. He rubs at his hole a little faster, more insistently and Vernon watches as his arms shake with the effort of keeping himself up. 

Vernon moves closer. He can’t help himself. Jack is so pretty, so lovely, he can’t help but touch. He reaches out and stokes at the backs of Jack’s thighs, fingers trailing over the warm skin. Jack gasps in surprise, looking back to see Vernon there, his eyes so warm as he finds Vernon’s gaze. 

“I-I’m gonna push inside now,” Jack says. 

Vernon watches as Jack pushes against his own entrance, pressing until his body gives and Jack’s finger starts to slide inside of his own ass. The sight is so fucking hot that Vernon is afraid he’ll come right then and there. He runs his hand up to Jack’s ass, squeezes at one of the cheeks, letting his nails dig-in just barely, earning a sweet moan from Jack. 

It’s so fucking hot to see Jack’s body opening up to take his own fingers, to see how badly Jack wants this, for him to be doing it in front of Vernon. It was all so much. 

“N-Now I’m gonna move a little,” Jack says and Vernon watches as he sets a slow pace, moving his finger in and out of himself, fingering himself lightly. Once he starts fingering himself Jack moans and his arm gives out as he tips forward against the bed, turning his face sideways against the mattress so he can breathe, panting harshly as he works himself open. 

He’s single-handedly the most beautiful thing that Vernon’s ever seen. 

“Holy shit,” Vernon breathes, petting Jack’s skin, touching his lower back, his ass, his thighs, feeling Jack’s body tremble with need. 

“Can I help?” Vernon asks breathlessly, his mind blank with everything but how amazing Jack looks right now. 

“Y-Yeah?” Jack says, “You want to?” 

“Yeah, can you take my finger too?” 

“That’s the plan if I want to fit your dick in me,” Jack says with a laugh. 

Vernon snorts, but his insides feel like fire. He picks up the discarded lube by Jack’s ankles, popping the cap and pouring it on to his fingers like he watched Jack do earlier. Vernon slicks up his fingerips and then closes the bottle and sets it aside. Jack’s still moving, still touching himself, waiting for Vernon to join him. Vernon hesitates for a moment, wanting to do this, but not wanting to hurt Jack or fuck up. 

Jack must sense Vernon’s hesitation because he lifts his head and glances back at Vernon. 

“Just press in alongside me, it’s okay.” 

Vernon nods, rubs at Jack’s rim, feeling the smooth, hot skin there, feeling Jack shake as Vernon touches him. He doesn’t tease long, instead he presses against Jack’s hole, the slide easier than he thought as he begins to sink into Jack. The feeling is strange, different from Vernon being with a girl, not worse or better, just different. It’s fucking hot to see Jack open around his finger, to feel himself there against Jack’s own. 

“Just mo-move a little,” Jack instructs. 

Vernon nods and begins to move inside of Jack’s ass, fingering him slow and easy and feeling Jack clench around him, feeling how tight he is. God, if he felt this good around Vernon’s finger he can only imagine how good it would feel to have Jack tight around his cock. 

Vernon and Jack move together, in-synch, prepping Jack. Vernon watches as Jack presses a second finger into himself, stretching himself open even further. He groans, making beautiful noises against the mattress, his hair in his face, his mouth open, tongue darting across his red lips. 

Jack’s starting to rock back into their fingers, moaning as he does so. Vernon sneaks his free hand between Jack’s legs and curls his hand around Jack’s cock, stroking him. Jack moans and rolls his hips forward into Vernon’s touch. Vernon rubs his thumb over the slit of Jack’s cock and listens to him hiss, feels him shiver. Jack is locked between wanting to press backwards against their fingers and forward into Vernon’s hands. 

“Holy fuck,” Jack moans, drawing in quick panting breaths, “Vern, oh my God.” 

Vernon moves his hand to Jack’s balls, rolling them gently and he listens to Jack whine in response. 

“It’s good?” Vernon asks. 

“Fuc-Fuck yes. I…God…I need you now.” 

Vernon watches as Jack starts to remove his fingers, Vernon following suit, his heart in his throat and his dick leaking in his underwear. Jack sits himself up, turning around and all but throwing himself at Vernon, kissing him hard, their teeth clacking together as they kiss. 

Jack’s hands find Vernon’s shoulders and then Jack is easing Vernon down on to his back on the bed. Jack’s hands going for Vernon’s boxer-briefs, tugging them down his thighs, not taking them all the way off, but leaving them bunched around the bottoms of his thighs, leaving Vernon bare just enough for his cock to spring free. Vernon’s dick lies hard and flushed against his stomach. Jack takes Vernon’s cock in his hand, stroking him from base to tip, rubbing just under the head of Vernon’s dick and feeling Vernon twitch in response. 

“Hand me the lube,” Jack says, nodding towards Vernon’s hands. 

Vernon finds the bottle near his elbow, the lube jostling around each time they shift or move on the bed. He hands it off to Jack and watches as Jack pops the cap again, squirting a liberal amount into his palm. He clicks the bottle closed and then sets it aside as he takes Vernon into his hand again, stroking him, wetting his length. 

“Sh-Shit,” Vernon moans at the touch, even this feeling like so much, feeling so good. He gets so hard when it’s Jack touching him, anything Jack does to him setting fire to his body. 

“Ready?” Jack asks. 

Vernon nods, watches as Jack releases his cock and moves to straddle him again. Even seeing Jack over him, waiting to sink down on to him, God, it’s so fucking hot that Vernon could die. Jack reaches between them and he takes Vernon’s dick in his hand, lines them up, the head of Vernon’s cock brushing Jack’s ass, sliding over his hole as Jack tries to steady himself. 

Jack holds Vernon’s cock at the base and Vernon’s hands skate up Jack’s calves, up over his thighs, settling at his hips, holding loosely as Jack begins to press down. The head of Vernon’s cock is flush against Jack’s hole and already he can feel the intense heat from him. 

“F-Fuck,” Vernon breathes, “Jack, holy shit.” 

Jack’s tongue swipes at his lips, his eyes fluttering as he slowly lowers himself on to Vernon’s cock. Vernon can see and _feel_ when Jack starts to open around him, when Vernon’s cock begins to sink into him. The heat is insane and Jack is so fucking tight, even when he’s just squeezing around the head of Vernon’s dick. 

Vernon freezes, letting Jack set the pace, letting him catch his breath and adjust to the feeling of having Vernon inside of him. 

“You feel so good,” Jack says, breathlessly, “Fuck.” 

Vernon doesn’t think there’s anything hotter than watching Jack sink down on his dick, watching his cock slowly disappear inside of Jack’s asshole. Maybe watching Jack’s eyes flutter, watching the white of his teeth bite into his lip, his nails digging soft pink trails into Vernon’s chest, gasping out shuddering breaths; that might be the only thing that’s even better. 

Finally, Jack is seated fully on Vernon’s cock, clenching around Vernon as he drags in a rough breath, lets himself adjust to the feeling of Vernon being fully inside. Vernon is holding Jack’s hips, breathing harshly through his nose, groaning whenever Jack clenches around him. The feeling is insane. Jack is so _tight_ , so hot. 

“Are you okay?” Vernon asks. 

Jack nods, licking at his lips, “I’m p-perfect.” 

Jack presses his palm flat against Vernon’s chest as he finally begins to move. He rocks a little, moving his hips back and forth, riding Vernon stunted and slow. Vernon doesn’t move, he lets Jack lead them, lets Jack control what they do. He just clings to Jack, his thumbs rubbing against Jack’s hipbones in slow, gentle circles. 

Jack starts to move. He pulls up, almost off of Vernon’s cock all the way before he eases himself back down slowly, tightening around Vernon as he sinks back down. Vernon shifts his palm from Jack’s hip over to his cock, wrapping his fingers around Jack’s dick, stroking him gently. Jack arches into the touch, letting out a surprised moan. Vernon touching him throws Jack off his rhythm, caught between thrusting into Vernon’s hand and lowering himself on to Vernon’s cock. 

Jack’s eyes are so hot as he looks at Vernon, his face going soft pink, his hair in his face and Vernon wishes he had had the foresight to tie it back for him, but at the same time he likes the messy look, likes how it makes Jack look a little rougher, a little wild. 

“Can’t believe this is happening,” Vernon says, “Can’t believe you’re riding me like this, Jack.” 

Jack moans and he grinds down against Vernon’s dick making his choice as he lets Vernon stroke him. 

“I’ve wanted this for a while,” Jack pants, “So many times I just wanted you to fuck me senseless.” 

“Fuck,” Vernon says, letting his thumb trail over Jack’s slit, pressing against it and he feels Jack shuddering against him. 

“When we r-rented that stupid party bus with the stripper pole? You were behind me and I was pretending to dance…I…God, I jerked off so many times imaging you pressing me against that pole and fucking me.” 

“Jesus,” Vernon says, he can’t help the way his hips roll upwards, the way he thrusts up into Jack. Jack moans and bears down against the thrust as he picks up his pace, “You ever think about fucking me?” 

Vernon can’t help but ask. He’s envisioned it a few times, not even necessarily with Jack, but in general, but once Jack ate him out the thought sunk into his head. He wanted to know what it felt like to have Jack take him, to have his legs wrapped around Jack’s waist as they fucked, as Jack pounded him into their mattress. 

Jack nods shakily. “Y-Yes. Thought about how you’d feel. Thought about how you’d sound. If you’d beg me to fuck you. If you’d let me come inside of you.” 

Vernon moans, Jack hitting at least half of Vernon’s turn-ons in one go. Judging by how it went when Vernon sucked Jack off it was safe to say that Vernon would do just about anything when it came to Jack, when it came to exploring sex with him. He liked the idea of getting fucked, making the fire in his stomach burn brighter, and he tingles all over as he realizes that they can do that too. They can fuck again and Vernon can be the one getting fucked. They have time to explore, time to be together in every way they could dream up together. 

“I’d let you,” Vernon says, still jerking Jack off, “I’d let you fuck me, Jack.” 

Jack moans, speeding up, tossing his head back as he rides Vernon’s cock. The room around them fills with the lewd sound of their skin meeting, the wet slick slide of Vernon’s cock in Jack’s ass, the sounds of their heavy breathing and the bed creaking with their movements. 

Early morning sunlight pours into the room, making everything a warm gold, making Jack look like a damn work of art as he rides Vernon’s dick. The two of them rock together, Jack practically bouncing on Vernon’s cock and Vernon rocking upwards to meet his thrusts. Jack’s hand slides down meet Vernon’s where he’s holding Jack’s hip, Jack sliding his fingers against Vernon’s, lacing them together so they are holding hands. 

There’s a heat building between them but it’s so much more than just sexual. It feels like everything all at once. It feels like Vernon’s chest is open, free-flowing, every emotion in him twining together, flooding the room, spilling over he and Jack like a wave. He loves Jack. He does, in every sense of the word he loves Jack. For the first time since it all began Vernon feels that twinge in his soul, he feels every bit the role he took on. He feels like Jack’s other-half, Jack’s husband. 

“V-Vernon,” Jack pants, grinding down against Vernon’s cock, squeezing tightly around him, groaning loud and needy, so beautiful, sending heat right into Vernon’s bones. Vernon can feel himself getting close, teetering on the edge, and he wants to last long enough to get Jack off first, doesn’t want to come too soon. He strokes Jack a little faster, twisting his fist around the head of Jack’s cock and watching him jerk into the touch. Vernon’s learned since he and Jack started hooking up that Jack is sensitive to touch, especially on his dick, his foreskin making every touch amplified. Vernon likes taking advantage of that, of watching the way Jack shivers, the way he moans, how he responds to even the littlest touches. 

“Are you close, baby?” Vernon asks, bringing his hand to his mouth to spit into his palm before he reaches down to touch Jack again, “You going to come for me?” 

Jack moans. He must be getting close because he loses his rhythm, his hips stuttering as he rides Vernon’s cock, Vernon jerking him off. Jack’s panting, his chest and face going flush, his hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. God, he’s beautiful. 

Vernon releases Jack’s dick, earning a whine from Jack, but he runs his hand up the back of Jack’s arm, curling around his shoulder and bringing him down, getting them chest-to-chest so he can kiss Jack, so he can push the hair from Jack’s face. Jack’s cock is trapped between their stomachs and Vernon can feel the slick head rubbing against the skin of his belly. 

Their kissing devolves into Jack panting messily against his mouth, gasping out, “Don’t stop. Vernon, don’t stop.” And Vernon thrusts into Jack, rocking his hips up to fill the man above him. He fucks a little quicker, a little harder than before and he feels Jack shaking, knows Jack is getting close. 

“Come for me,” Vernon mumbles against Jack’s mouth, “Come for me, Jack.” 

“I want to,” Jack says, “Fuck, I wanna come.” 

“I’m close,” Vernon tells him, “You’re going to make me come inside of you. I’m gonna fill you up.” 

Jack moans, Vernon’s words helping to push him over the edge because Vernon can feel him falling apart. Jack freezes on top of him, shaking as he comes sticky and wet between their bodies, Vernon fucking him through his orgasm, speeding headfirst into his own. He holds Jack tight and fucks into the warm heat of Jack’s body, once, twice, before he’s burying himself inside of Jack, stars shooting behind his eyelids as he comes hard.

The two of them slump together in an overheated heap on the bed. Jack pants wetly against Vernon’s neck, struggling to catch his breath. They just woke up, but Vernon already feels drained, like he could sleep for hours, naked, and warm, and wrapped in Jack. 

Jack lifts his head and Vernon catches his mouth in a lazy kiss. 

“I love you,” Vernon breathes, “I fucking love you, Jack.” 

Jack huffs out a breathless laugh, “I fuckin’ love you too.” 

Vernon eases himself out of Jack, listening to Jack moan and hearing the slick noise of his cock sliding out of Jack. If he hadn’t just come that might be enough to get him going again. Jack collapses on the bed, pushing his hair out of his face. 

“God, I know we should shower but I’m not sure I can move right now,” Jack says. 

Vernon turns on his side, seeking Jack’s hand and lacing their fingers together. 

“We could take a sweaty disgusting nap and then wake up and shower?” 

“Mmm,” Jack says, his eyes fluttering, “I suppose we have to wash the sheets anyway.” 

“Yeah, a little filth-nap won’t hurt,” Vernon says, bringing their hands to his mouth and pressing a kiss to where their fingers are joined, “Maybe…you could fuck me in the shower later?” 

“Oh hell,” Jack says, “Yer tryin’ to get me hard again.” 

Vernon licks his lips, the urge real and insistent inside of him. 

“Maybe…but save it for post-nap.” 

Jack searches Vernon’s face before he smiles and presses his sweaty body close to Vernon’s. 

“Deal.” 

\--

It’s been two months since Jack and Vernon started dating for real. Two months of growing as a couple, figuring each other out, of small petty arguments – like whose turn it is to do the dishes, and who drank the last of the milk – decorating their apartment to incorporate more of Jack’s style, buying cat toys for Mike, and generally just being a blissfully happy couple. Two months but it’s almost felt like forever. Vernon’s never been so content with another person before as he is with Jack, never felt like this with anyone he’s ever been with. It feels easy and perfect all at once. He feels like he can do anything as long as Jack’s by his side. 

The green card issue has been progressing and every day they jump another hurdle set-up by the Immigration office, every day they grow closer to the end goal of Jack getting his green card and staying here forever. 

Vernon’s lighting a candle on the coffee table when he hears Jack’s keys jangle in the door. He hurriedly throws the lighter in the still open drawer of the end table and then bumps the drawer closed with his hip. Vernon runs a hand over his shirt, through his hair, pushes his glasses up on his nose and waits for Jack to enter the apartment. 

“Hey, babe,” Jack says as he slips inside, shutting the door behind him, “Are you feeling better?” 

“Yeah, a lot better,” Vernon says, trying to stay calm, trying not to break. He had called in sick to work today, telling Arin he didn’t feel well and it was probably for the best that he stay home. Jack had still gone into work, but only after Vernon had insisted that he’d be fine on his own for a few hours. 

Jack toes off his sneakers and sets his keys in the little bowl by the door. He finally turns to face Vernon, smiling at him before his eyes fall to the coffee table, to Vernon’s surprise. 

“Is that sushi?” Jack asks. 

“Surprise!” Vernon says, “I ordered us dinner.” 

Jack grins and pads up to Vernon, getting on his toes to press a kiss to Vernon’s cheek. 

“You’re so cute. So, were you really sick or did you just want to stay home so you could surprise me with food?” 

Vernon laughs, “You’re accusing me of _lying_ to miss work? I’d never do that,” Vernon says. 

Jack snorts, “Yeah, sure.” Michael curls around his ankles and he bends to pet her, picking up her soft cloth shamrock that they’d gotten for her and tossing it down the hall, Michael skittering after it like she’s some kind of puppy. “I’m just gonna wash my hands.” 

“Okay,” Vernon says and he sits on the floor on one side of the coffee table, the other side intended for Jack to sit. It feels like it takes Jack forever to wash his hands and return to the living room, but he eventually does. “Your seat,” Vernon says, waving a hand to the opposite side of the coffee table. 

“Pretty nice set-up,” Jack says as he lowers himself to the floor, sitting cross-legged, surveying the work that Vernon had done, “The candles are a nice touch.” 

“The lady at Target told me they’re supposed to smell like orchids.” 

Jack looks offended, “You went to Target without me?” 

“I know, I know. I’m the worst boyfriend ever, but I also got you sushi.” 

“That’s true,” Jack says, lifting the top off of his plastic container of sushi, “This looks good. Did you get it from our usual place?” 

Vernon nods. “I was kind of craving it.” 

“Good call,” Jack says, “Can we eat? I’m kinda starving.” 

Vernon feels a little too nervous to eat, but he nods anyway, to say anything else would only draw suspicions from Jack. Vernon picks at his sushi and Jack skillfully uses his chopsticks to pick up his pieces. 

“Hey,” Vernon says, drawing Jack’s attention to him, “Do you remember what we were talking about that time we first ate sushi together?” 

“You mean our first ‘date’?” Jack asks, wiping at his mouth with a napkin. 

“Yeah, do you remember?” 

Jack hums, “I think I was a little too wrapped up in how cute I thought you were, everything else from that day has kinda gone blank.” 

“It’s okay, I remember,” Vernon says, “we were talking about how nervous we were being the ‘new guys’ in the office, how badly we wanted this to work out, how much we liked it there.”

“Aw,” Jack says, “Now look at us.” 

“Yeah,” Vernon says, “funny how things work isn’t it? But…I remember too that you jokingly said we’d stick together, that we should make a pact to be a team and look out for each other. We barely knew each other, but it meant a lot to me at the time…it still does.” 

Jack smiles, “Looks like we kept that promise, didn’t we?” 

Vernon reaches across the table and covers Jack’s hand with his own. 

“Thanks for having my back all this time.” 

“Thanks for having mine,” Jack says, “You’re being sentimental tonight.” 

Vernon flushes and looks down at his dinner. “I guess, I’m just thankful for how this all turned out. I’m happy with you, with the life we have together. I thought I enjoyed it all so much because it meant I wouldn’t feel lonely, but it’s so much more than that. I just feel like you’re a part of me, some big, huge part I was always missing, always looking for, and you were a whole country away until we suddenly ended up in the same place, at the same time.” 

“Vernon,” Jack says, “You’re gonna make me cry.” 

“Sorry,” Vernon says around a smile, “I just want you to know that I appreciate you. That I love you.” 

“I love you too. You’re brilliant, funny as all hell, creative as shit and cooler than I’ll ever be.” 

“That’s debatable,” Vernon says, withdrawing his hand from Jack’s to take another bite of his sushi. 

“Not to me,” Jack says. 

They keep eating and Jack tells Vernon about his day at the office, how they were trying to shoot a commercial for some new Grump merch coming out soon, but every single time they started to record a siren would go off from outside. 

“I swear to God it got so bad that Barry thought Brian set something up, like he was paying Matt and Ryan to ruin the takes or something,” Jack says, giggling to himself. 

Vernon laughs, “I would not put it past him.” 

“Yeah,” Jack says, leaning back and patting his stomach, “We eventually got it done though which is a relief. I think I’m going to start editing it tomorrow.” 

They’ve finished their dinners and Jack sighs, grabbing his empty container. 

“I’m gonna throw this out before our apartment smells like raw fish for weeks.” 

“I’ll help you,” Vernon says, standing alongside Jack, following him into the kitchen where they dump the remnants of their dinners into the garbage can. Vernon will have to pull it out tomorrow so their trash doesn’t stink up the rest of the apartment, but for now it can wait. 

Jack stretches as he pads back into the living room, popping his back and sighing in satisfaction. 

“So, is there something you want to watch on Netflix or-“ Jack turns to look at Vernon and that’s when Vernon catches Jack’s hand in his own. 

Vernon’s heart is beating wildly, faster than he thought humanly possible, like he just biked a killer trail. Vernon can hear his own breathing, his nerves shooting up his spine, but it’s too late to stop now. He did all of this. He got the dinner, the candles, he can’t _not_ do this.

“Vernon?” Jack asks, “Are you okay?” 

Vernon nods and then with what he hopes is with grace, he sinks down to one knee on the living room floor of their apartment. 

“I realized something,” Vernon says, looking up at Jack whose watching him with huge eyes, “I realized that all those months ago when we agreed to get married that I never properly proposed to you. We never had that, and you’re so amazing, we’re so good _together_ , that I think you definitely deserve a proper proposal.” 

Vernon digs into the pocket of his pants, producing the little velvet box that he had spent hours picking out. He releases Jack’s hand so he could present the box, lifting the top and showing Jack the simple golden ring inside. It didn’t look too different from the ring Jack was currently wearing, just a little more expensive – thanks to Arin – and an engravement of their initials in the band. 

“Jack, you’re my best friend. You’re the person I love more than anyone else. You’re all that I could want in this world. I’m lucky to have you, lucky to call you mine, lucky to share my life with you. So, I want to know…will you marry me, Jack? For real this time?” 

Jack is quiet. Vernon knows this is sudden. They’re technically married already, but they’ve only been dating two months. Vernon wasn’t sure if Jack felt ready to commit to this for real, forever, but Vernon was ready, and he had to take the chance. 

“You are trying to make me cry,” Jack says wiping at his eyes, laughing as his face turns red, “Yes.” The one little word fills Vernon with life and he propels himself up to his feet, catching Jack in a hug, tucking his face into Jack’s shoulder. 

Jack laughs, hides his face in Vernon’s shoulder, and Vernon can feel the heat of his breath and the dampness on his cheeks. He lifts Jack off his feet and spins him a little, Jack clinging to him. When they break apart Vernon shows Jack the ring. 

“It’s okay if you like your original ring more. I just thought that I should offer a new one.” 

Jack plucks the ring from the box with shaking fingers, turning it in his hands. He spots the engravement, the simple: _J &V_ that is carved there. Vernon watches him run a finger over it before their eyes meet. 

“I love it.” 

“I have one too, with the same carving on it.” 

Jack slides his new ring on his finger alongside his old one, both fitting perfectly, nestled together on his finger. 

Jack wraps his arms around Vernon’s shoulders, smiling at him as he leans in to press a kiss to Vernon’s mouth. 

“I didn’t know that one of the scariest, worst moments in my life was going to lead to the best thing that ever happened to me,” Jack says, “that it would lead me to you.” 

Vernon kisses Jack again, sweet and soft, his heart so full it could burst. Every bad moment, every ounce of pain, of heartache, every fight, it was all worth it in the end because it led to now, to them. It led to Vernon finding the person he knows he’s absolutely supposed to be with, the person he might not have found if he hadn’t made one rash decision to help one of his best friends so many months ago. 

\--

One year later Jack and Vernon are renewing their vows. That’s what they call it officially for legal reasons, but to everyone around them it’s their proper wedding. The green card process had finally been resolved a few months ago and Jack had been issued his green card. That didn’t mean that magically the Immigration office stopped checking in on them, as Ross liked to remind them. As far as they knew the office could keep tabs on them for the next three years. Vernon isn’t too worried about it, especially now, with their renewal/wedding. He and Jack are solid, and he knows it, the process of dealing with immigration becoming familiar to the both of them, less and less feeling like something to fear. 

The wedding isn’t something thrown together in a span of two weeks this time, but something Jack and Vernon had planned for months on end. It’s an outdoor wedding again, but instead of being held on a mountain they’ve gone for a park this time. There are rows, and rows of white chairs settled into the lush grass of the park. All the grumps are there; Arin and Kevin as well as Jack’s brothers serving as Jack’s groomsmen, Dan, Vernon’s brothers, and Leighton serving as Vernon’s.

This time around Vernon and Jack’s families get to attend the wedding. After becoming a legitimate couple, Vernon took Jack home and let him meet his parents. For how much Vernon had been afraid of their opinion they loved Jack, his mom grabbing Vernon by the arm and excitedly whispering to him about what a catch she thought Jack was. 

Jack’s family had flown in just for the wedding, arriving a few days before the ceremony. Jack and Vernon took them out to dinner and Vernon got to officially meet Jack’s parents, his older brother, and his younger brother and sister. They were lovely, just like Jack, as if Vernon expected any less from the Walsh family. At some point drinks had been served at dinner and Jack’s older brother had slung an arm around Vernon and happily toasted to Vernon “Becoming a Walsh!” to which the rest of Jack’s family toasted and cheered along. Vernon doesn’t think he’s ever seen Jack as happy as he was that night, his face wide with pride, his smile persistent the entire night as he got to be around Vernon and his family. 

“You’ll come back to Lisburn for the honeymoon, right?” Jack’s mom had asked Jack over their dinner. 

Jack had glanced at Vernon. They hadn’t talked about a honeymoon much, but Vernon’s been wanting to see Ireland for a long time now, and he’d love to see Jack’s hometown, this big piece of Jack he’s never seen before. 

“We’d love to,” Vernon had said, answering for the two of them. 

Jack’s mom smiled and reached out touch Vernon’s hand. 

“You’ll love it!” 

Brian is officiating the ceremony again and he stands with pride at the make-shift wedding arch that’s serving as an altar. Suzy had helped with decorating again even though Jack and Vernon were taking more creative control this time around. There were maybe a few more skulls than last time, but there were still some minimal fairy lights, silver bows tied to chairs, a fresh purple orchid tucked into the lapel of Vernon and Jack’s suits. 

The two of them stand in front of their friends, their families, the whole world, hands joined. It doesn’t feel at all like the first time. Vernon is calm, is happy. Jack’s eyes are bright, crinkling around the corners as he smiles at Vernon. 

He used to think love was this unobtainable thing. Something that he could grasp at, but would ultimately slip from between his fingers. He had resigned himself to a solitary life where he’d be happy on his own, where he didn’t need love, but looking at Jack now he knows he found it, that it was there all along in plain sight. 

Brian smiles at them as he wraps up his wedding speech.

“With the power vested in me by a five-hour course on the internet, Vernon, Jack, you two may mutually kiss as husbands.” 

The crowd around them cheers and Jack laughs. Vernon laughs as he feels Jack tug him close. He feels so weightless, feels like he could fly away, like nothing could stop him. He kisses Jack, his husband, and he knows in his heart that he never has to pretend to love Jack, not for one single second, never again, not for the rest of his life.


End file.
